21/11/2025
I read a line the other day about going to your first deceased body and how you cope.
It said, āthe first one takes everything from you, the rest are free of charge.ā
Thereās a version of you that exists before you see what people are capable of.
Before the evil.
Before the chaos.
Before the scenes that play on a loop in your head long after everyone else moves on.
Once you lift that veil on society, you canāt unsee it.
You canāt unknow it.
Something in you shifts ā quietly, permanently.
You donāt come home the same.
You donāt look at people the same.
You donāt look at yourself the same.
You learn to function with a part of you missing, a part you never get back.
You learn to laugh again, but itās different.
You learn to love again, but itās guarded.
You learn to live again, but itās heavier.
And thatās the part no one talks about ā
how the job rewires you.
How you lose pieces of the old you without realising it.
How survival slowly becomes a personality trait.
But if youāre still hereā¦
still showing upā¦
still tryingā¦
Then that says something too.
It means the darkness didnāt win.
Not today.