15/12/2025
There’s a whole side of perimenopause and menopause that women hardly ever speak about.
You hear the obvious ones…hot flushes, night sweats, mood swings…but there is an entire universe of symptoms, physical, emotional, messy, confronting, that happen quietly, privately, behind closed doors.
That’s why I’m talking about it…part of being a Menopause and weight loss coach means I hear it daily, but women feel closed about it.
We weren’t warned about so many physical changes and none of us should feel alone!
For many women, it starts long before they realise what’s happening…
The anxiety that appears out of nowhere.
The tears over things that never used to bother you.
The sudden rage that shocks even you!
You feel like you’re losing control…or worse, losing yourself. 🙃
Then there’s the sleep…or lack of it.
Falling asleep is easy, staying asleep becomes the real problem…trust me, no amount of wines or beers will help you sleep better….
You wake at 2am or 3am like someone switched a light on inside your brain.
Tossing, turning, staring at the ceiling, knowing you’ll have to function the next day on fumes.
You start to dread bedtime because you know the battle that’s coming. 🫣
The fatigue…
Not “tired” but drained…
A bone-deep heaviness that makes the simplest tasks feel like climbing a mountain.
The dishwasher feels overwhelming.
The idea of cooking dinner feels impossible.
Some days you are just surviving…not thriving.
One no one talks about is the grief.
The grief that comes with your body changing.
The grief of losing the version of yourself you once knew so well.
The grief of feeling older than you expected to feel…you are not even old 😫
Then there’s the gut…
The unpredictable bloating that can make you look six months pregnant within an hour.
The constipation, diarrhoea, cramps, food intolerances that appear out of nowhere.
You start avoiding events because you’re never sure how your stomach will behave.
Let’s talk about the relationship stuff too…
because this part is silent, painful, and real.
The loss of libido.
The discomfort during intimacy.
The frustration of wanting connection but your body says “no.”
The miscommunication, the tension, the worry that your partner thinks it’s them, when it’s your hormones playing pickel ball inside your body.
The emotional connection!!
Sometimes you feel detached from the people you love the most.
You’re physically there but mentally floating somewhere else.
It’s lonely…often this is where us women go to the Docs for happy pills.
You don’t say anything because you don’t want to be “dramatic.” 😣
The brain fog is another layer of chaos. 🥴
Forgetting words mid-sentence.
Walking into a room and forgetting why.
Reading a message and instantly forgetting what it said.
You feel scattered…foggy…not as sharp as you once were.
That can be terrifying when you’ve always been the one who “has it together.”
Then there are the rare and strange symptoms that no one warns you about…
– Burning mouth
– Itchy skin (especially the shins and arms)
– Electric shock sensations
– Sudden food reactions
– Ringing ears and itchy ears
– Random joint pain
– Heart palpitations
– Tingling in hands and feet
– The weird “internal vibrating” feeling
– Breasts that suddenly ache
– Hair thinning in places you want it…growing in places you do not want 😬
– Body odour changes
– Dry eyes, dry skin, dry everything 🫣
These symptoms show up uninvited, without explanation, and can make you feel like you’re falling apart piece by piece.
The weight.
Oh yes the weight.
You’re exercising.
You’re eating the same.
Sometimes even eating less.
But your body is like…”Nope…we are storing everything now.”
Your waistline shifts.
Your shape changes.
You don’t recognise yourself in photos.
No matter how disciplined you are…the scales barely moves.
It’s frustrating.
It’s emotional.
It’s unfair.
For so many women…it’s a silent battle!!
The family impact is real too.
Your patience shrinks.
Your tolerance disappears.
You snap faster.
You apologise more.
You feel guilty constantly because you’re trying your hardest but your hormones are doing their own thing.
The hardest part, on the outside, you look “fine.”
You look “normal.”
You look like you’re coping.
But underneath…
You are carrying more than anyone will ever understand unless they are living through it.
There are so many symptoms, common ones, rare ones, strange ones that never make it into everyday conversations.
There are close to 100 symptoms that science now correlates to this phase of life.
Perimenopause and menopause don’t just affect your hormones…
They affect your confidence, your relationships, your identity, your entire life!
So I’m sharing this because someone out there needs to hear it.
Someone is reading this thinking,
“Oh my God…that’s me…I’m not crazy…I’m not alone.”
These are the parts women don’t talk about.
These are the invisible battles behind the brave face.
These are the stories that deserve to be told.
We need to talk more about this.
If this helps even one woman feel understood, validated, or seen…
then it’s worth sharing. ❤️
If you made it this far… you can do anything 🫶🏼
But for more help navigating through this journey please contact St Anne’s Therapy Clinic .
