24/10/2025
Kindness Isn’t Just for Dogs
We talk a lot about “do no harm” and “force-free” in dog care. But too often, that ethos stops at the dogs. We extend compassion to dogs, understanding their trauma, their triggers, their unmet needs—and yet when a human behaves in a way we don’t like, we default to judgment, shame, and hate.
I feel deeply privileged to have worked with people before I worked with dogs. That experience shaped me. It taught me that change, real, lasting change, comes from support, not punishment. From care and understanding, not condemnation.
We’re quick to explore why a dog lunges, growls, or shuts down:
• Is it pain?
• Past trauma?
• Lack of safety or understanding?
But when a human lashes out, we rarely ask the same. We forget that people are shaped by their own histories, wounds, and unmet needs. We forget that behaviour is communication.
Emotions Are Valid. Cruelty Is Not.
It’s okay to feel angry. Hurt. Disappointed. Those emotions are real and valid. But they don’t justify bullying or cruelty. We cannot preach kindness while practicing hate. We cannot condemn bullying towards dogs and then bully humans we disagree with.
Kindness isn’t passive. It’s not weakness. It’s a radical choice to meet conflict with integrity. To fight for justice without becoming unjust.
The Trap of Extremism
Belief systems can become cages. When we cling too tightly to being “right,” we lose the ability to grow, to listen, to learn. Extremism, whether in dog training or human discourse, shuts down dialogue in our own mind. It stops us thinking the more difficult truths about ourselves.
I will never condone aversive tools. I will never support dominance-based training. But I will not shame those who use them. Because shame doesn’t teach. It entrenches. And if I truly believe in kindness as a path to change, I must walk that path with everyone.
I’ve worked with people who’ve done terrible things. But when I stopped judging and started supporting, I saw transformation. Not because I excused their actions, but because I offered a space where change felt possible.
You can’t make someone be kind by hating them. You can’t make someone see your truth by making them feel small. Every time we berate, preach, or shame, we push people deeper into their own beliefs.
If Kindness Works for Dogs, It Works for People
If we want the world to believe that kindness rehabilitates dogs, we must show that it rehabilitates people too. Not just in our words, but in our actions. In how we treat those we disagree with. In how we hold space for discomfort, dialogue, and growth.
Kindness isn’t just a training method. It’s a way of being.
