12/02/2025
A story of childhood trauma...
'The Good Fairy', adapted by Jan Mullen from a story by Tara Brach.
From the corners where the silence remains, there came the urgency to go to a mountain top and scream out the whole truth.
Rose sent out a prayer to God, to the universe: 'It's too painful, I can't take it!' Then she came to Rose, the power of mind, the energy of the universe, the Good Fairy in The Wizard of Oz, waving a wand.
Rose sat cross-legged on the floor of her bedroom, looking up; she was about eight years old. The Good Fairy said, 'Here's the deal. There's just too much going on here and I don't have the power to make it be gone, to make it be okay, or even to help you cope with it in a way that's not going to cause you some pain.'
'What can I do,' said the Good Fairy, 'is help you get through this time now, help you get through it as it is going on. It will come back, but it will come back to you only at a later time, when you're able to handle it and there will be someone to help you.' Rose said, 'Okay, because I can't take it any more.'
The Good Fairy waved her wand, saying: 'I am going to send the painful things that are happening into different parts of your body and will hold them for you like it's a time capsule.'
'Your heart, your heart is broken and I'm going to have to let your rib cage close in around it and let your heart constrict so that you don't feel the pain of your heart breaking.'
'I'm going to really need to tighten up your neck to let it be a fortress with very thick round walls, so that what you are feeling doesn't get up to your mouth, and you can't speak the words. You can't cry out for help and can't scream out in rage. You won't be able to breathe too deeply, to feel what's going on in your body. That fortress will keep the knowledge of what's happening in your body from connecting with your head, so that you will not be fully conscious of what's going on.'
'I will tie up your ears, so that you hear but you won't take too much in. And this is what I will do with your mind. It will store the truth in a deep, deep place, sealed away behind steel doors of fear. This will for now help you to live with, accept and believe the lies you are told. The lie that you deserve this and that this is the way your life has to be.'
'When the time is right, you will begin to open up. It will be a very long process. It may take as long to heal as you've been in pain and in the frozen place. Finally, your body will no longer be able to hold all this in. Your muscles will begin to give way, you will feel an urgency to do physical healing, and that will begin this process of really unwinding your body and releasing everything you've been holding all these years. There will be physical as well as emotional pain in the process.'
'By then you will be strong enough, safe enough and old enough to bear the truth and you will have a special friend, who will be the grown-up - adult - you, your Self, who will hold you as no one else can, as you find yourself again.
'Now I want you to go to bed. I will wave my wand and you will go to sleep, and when you wake up, you will forget I was ever here. You will forget you asked for help and you will no longer feel your daily pain. This is the only way I know to get you through this.'
