Held SEN Support Space

Held SEN Support Space Held is a gentle support space for SEN mums who are tired, overwhelmed, and doing their best.

Sometimes the smallest patch of sunshine is all you need 🤍Doug showing us how to pause, sit, and just be
25/04/2026

Sometimes the smallest patch of sunshine is all you need 🤍
Doug showing us how to pause, sit, and just be

23/04/2026

🌿 HELD – SEN Support Space 🌿

“School avoidance is just a new trend…”

I sat in a meeting recently and heard those words.

And if I’m honest… it hurt.

Not because I don’t understand where schools are coming from — I do.
I’ve worked in education for over 26 years.

But because behind every child who can’t attend school,
there is a story.

A real one.

Not a trend.
Not a phase.
Not poor parenting.

A nervous system in overwhelm.
A child who feels unsafe, even when they can’t explain why.
A family trying everything… and still being told it’s not enough.

⸻

Let’s gently say this, together:

School avoidance is not new.
What’s new… is that children are showing us more clearly when something isn’t working for them.

And that takes courage.

⸻

For some children, walking through the school gate is easy.
For others, it feels like standing at the edge of something their body simply cannot manage.

That’s not defiance.
That’s distress.

⸻

As parents, you sit in those meetings
holding it all together
while quietly carrying the weight of:

• sleepless nights
• heightened anxiety
• trying every strategy you’ve been given
• and still feeling like you’re being questioned

I see you.

⸻

And to the professionals reading this — because I know many of you do —
this isn’t about blame.

It’s about understanding.

When we shift from
“Why won’t they come in?”
to
“What’s making it hard for them to be here?”

Everything changes.

⸻

No parent chooses this path.
No child wants to feel this way.

This isn’t a trend.

This is children asking — in the only way they can —
to be understood.

⸻

🌿 No question is silly. No parent walks alone. 🌿

⸻

If this is your journey right now…
you are not failing.

You are responding to your child in the way they need most.

And that matters more than anything.

23/04/2026

There’s a moment many SEND parents experience.

The moment you meet another parent who just gets it.

Suddenly you don’t have to explain the acronyms.
You don’t have to justify your worries.

You’re simply understood.

SEND parenting can feel incredibly isolating, but connecting with others on a similar path can make such a difference.

Advice is shared.
Experiences are validated.
And the weight many parents carry alone becomes a little lighter.

That’s why we created Cuppa & Chat nearly nine years ago.

Friendly, informal sessions where SEND parents can connect online or in person.

They’re always free.

You can join us here:
https://www.eventbrite.com/cc/cuppachat-sessions-3847953

19/04/2026

HELD – SEN Support Space

“For the parents the system keeps overlooking… but who never stop showing up.”

This one is for the parents out there…

The ones making the calls.
Chasing the referrals.
Repeating their child’s story over and over again.

The ones being passed from one service to another…
told “it’s not us”…
told “you’re not in the right area”…
told “there’s nothing more we can do.”

And still… they keep going.

đź’›

This is for the parents
battling a system that too often tries to ignore them.

Not because they’re difficult.
Not because they’re asking for too much.

But because they are asking for what their child is entitled to.

Support.
Assessment.
Understanding.
Care.

⸻

🌿 Let’s say it clearly:

These parents are not a problem.

They are advocates.
They are protectors.
They are the voice their child doesn’t yet have.

They are warriors—even on the days they feel completely worn down.

⸻

🌿 Behind every “pushy parent” label…

Is usually a Mum or Dad who:

Hasn’t slept properly in weeks.
Is holding multiple children with different needs.
Is navigating systems that don’t join up.
Is carrying worry, exhaustion, and responsibility all at once.

And still…
they show up.

⸻

🌿 If this is you:

We see you.

We see the strength it takes
to keep going when you’re being ignored.

We see the courage it takes
to question professionals and ask again.

We see the love behind every email, every phone call, every “I’m not giving up.”

⸻

🌿 A quiet truth:

If the system worked properly…
you wouldn’t have to fight this hard.

⸻

🌿 So keep going (even gently):

Your voice matters.
Your child matters.
And what you’re asking for is valid.

Even when it feels like no one is listening.

⸻

You are not “too much.”
You are doing exactly what your child needs.

And in this space…
you are HELD 🤍

⸻

“We see your progress — even when it’s small, because every step matters.”
Supporting every child, every step of the way 🌿

19/04/2026

And in the middle of this is a Mum…

A single Mum.
With a 13-year-old navigating a sleep disorder.
A 4-year-old showing ADHD traits.
And a 3-month-old baby in her arms.

Trying to juggle appointments that don’t exist.
Phone calls that go nowhere.
Nights with little to no sleep.
Days where everything still has to carry on.

Trying to cope.

🤍

Sleep disorders are not “just a phase.”
They impact learning, behaviour, emotional wellbeing… everything.

And most importantly…

We see you.

The broken nights.
The heavy days.
The strength it takes to keep advocating when you’re running on empty.

You are holding more than most people will ever realise.

19/04/2026

🌿 HELD – SEN Support Space

“When the system loops… and your child is the one stuck in the middle.”

You go to the GP…
They refer you to the hospital.

You go to the hospital…
They tell you the clinic no longer exists.

You try another hospital…
They say you’re not in their catchment.

And somewhere in all of that…
your child is still not sleeping.

Still exhausted.
Still struggling.
Still expected to show up to school like everything is fine.

đź’”

This is something so many parents don’t talk about enough.

The endless back-and-forth.
The “not our department.”
The feeling of hitting wall after wall while your child is the one paying the price.

And then… school asks for medical evidence.

But how do you get evidence…
when no one will actually see your child?

🤷‍♀️

⸻

🌿 If this is you right now, hear this:

You are not failing.
You are navigating a system that isn’t joined up.

Your child’s needs are real.
Even if the pathway to support feels invisible.

Sleep disorders are not “just a phase.”
They impact learning, behaviour, emotional wellbeing… everything.

⸻

🌿 A gentle reminder (because sometimes we need one):

You are allowed to go back.
You are allowed to ask again.
You are allowed to say:

👉 “This isn’t resolved.”
👉 “My child still needs help.”
👉 “Where do we go?”

⸻

🌿 Small steps forward (if you’re feeling stuck):

• Ask your GP for a written letter confirming your child’s sleep difficulties
• Request a referral to community paediatrics
• Contact PALS if you’re being bounced between services
• Keep a simple sleep diary – your voice is evidence too

⸻

🌿 And most importantly…

We see you.

The tired mornings.
The battles to get out the door.
The guilt.
The worry.
The strength it takes to keep going when nothing feels clear.

You are holding more than people realise.

And in this space…
you don’t have to carry it alone 🤍

⸻

“We see your progress — even when it’s small, because every step matters.”
Supporting every child, every step of the way 🌿

I’ve had a few parents ask me recently about their baby having a flat head…And I can hear the worry behind the question ...
09/04/2026

I’ve had a few parents ask me recently about their baby having a flat head…
And I can hear the worry behind the question every time.

“Have I done something wrong?”
“Will it stay like that?”
“Should I be doing more?”

So let me gently say this first…

đź’› This is really common
đź’› It is not your fault
đź’› And there are simple things that really do help

⸻

Babies spend a lot of time on their backs (as they should for safe sleep),
so sometimes a little flattening can happen.

What helps most isn’t anything complicated…

🌿 Little and often tummy time
🌿 More cuddles upright (these count more than you think)
🌿 Encouraging baby to look both ways
🌿 Reducing long stretches on flat surfaces when possible

⸻

And most importantly…

✨ As babies grow, move, sit and explore…
their head shape usually rounds out naturally

⸻

If something doesn’t feel right —
for example, baby always turns one way, or it’s not improving —
it’s absolutely okay to speak to your health visitor.

You’re not overreacting.
You’re advocating 💛

⸻

You are doing enough.
You are noticing.
You are responding.
That is what matters.

⸻

If this is something you’re navigating right now,
you’re not alone 🤍

Cathy – HELD

06/04/2026

But know this…

I love my children exactly as they are.
I wouldn’t change them for anything.

The world just needs to meet them there.

If you’re one of those parents this week —
You are not alone.
You are held.” 🤍**

06/04/2026

Across the country this week,
thousands of parents are holding their breath…

Waiting. Hoping. Praying
that their child gets the school place they need.

Because this isn’t just about a school…
It’s about safety.
Understanding.
A place where their child can belong.

If you’re one of those parents this week —
I see you.

You are not alone.
You are held.” 🤍**

🌿 HELD – SEN Support Space“She was the only one not invited…”My daughter was 4.Undiagnosed, but already walking her own ...
06/04/2026

🌿 HELD – SEN Support Space

“She was the only one not invited…”

My daughter was 4.
Undiagnosed, but already walking her own unique path.

A party was happening…
Not just nearby —
but in the garden next door.

Every child in her class was invited.

Except her.

⸻

I remember the feeling so clearly đź’”
That deep, aching heartbreak — not for me,
but for her.

Because it’s never just about the party…
It’s about belonging.
It’s about being included.
It’s about feeling like you matter.

⸻

And the hardest part?

She didn’t even realise. 🤍

She was completely oblivious.
While I stood there, holding all of that hurt for her.

⸻

So I did the only thing I could in that moment…
I took her out.

Not to run away —
but to protect her.
To hold her in something gentler.

⸻

🌱 What I’ve learned since

Sometimes, as SEN parents,
we carry a quiet grief…

For the things our children don’t even know they’re missing.

And that grief is real.
It matters.
You matter.

⸻

🤍 A gentle truth

Your child’s worth is not measured
by who invites them to a party.

But the world still has learning to do
about what true inclusion really looks like.

⸻

If you’ve ever stood in that same place…
heart aching for your child…

Please know this:

You are not alone.
You are seen.
You are held. 🤍

Address

Locks Heath
Fareham
SO31

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