Therapy with Abby

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Therapy with Abby

https://therapywithabby.komi.io

16/12/2025

One of the biggest mistakes I see when people set boundaries is taking too much responsibility for how the other person feels.

If you grew up having to keep the peace, other people’s emotions can feel urgent. Like something that needs tending to. Quickly.

So when you say no - or ask for something different - and you’re met with sadness, confusion, disappointment, or even anger,
it can be hard not to soften it, over-explain, or walk it back.

But someone having an emotional response
doesn’t automatically mean you’ve done something wrong.

They might feel sad. Or frustrated. Or disappointed. That can be true - and you can still stay with your no.

Both things can exist at once.

Just remember:
You are not responsible for managing how someone responds to your boundaries. You are only responsible for setting them. ❤️

26/11/2025

You don’t need a dramatic trauma history to have unmet childhood needs.

Many of us grew up without enough emotional attunement, support, or safety - and learned to cope by staying small, staying busy, or staying very, very capable.

Those patterns protected you. But now they’re keeping you stuck in loops of overthinking, self-abandonment, and nervous system overwhelm.

These aren’t personal flaws. They’re echoes of care you didn’t receive - and it’s not too late to offer that care to yourself now.

Reparenting Your Inner Child is a 7-part, therapist-guided audio course to help you gently untangle old patterns, regulate your nervous system, and feel softer, steadier, and more supported in your everyday life.

It’s 35% off for Black Friday - £39 instead of £59.
If this feels like your season for deeper healing, the link is in my bio 💕

21/11/2025

If this post spoke to you - if slowing down feels uncomfortable, confronting, or strangely hard - I’ve made something that might help.

It’s a free guide called The Art of Slowing Down.

Inside I share things like why finding your signature ‘unwind scent’ can be a powerful cue for calm, and the tiny shift that turns an ordinary walk into something that actually calms your nervous system - without requiring a whole new routine.

These are the exact practices I use when slowing down feels unbearable - when rest makes me twitchy, when busy has become my shield.

If you’d like the guide, comment ANCHOR below and I’ll send it straight to you. 🤍

05/11/2025

I made a list of 30 simple ways to reparent your inner child - gentle, practical things you can start doing today.

💬 Comment “REPAIR” and I’ll send it to you 💕

03/11/2025

When our child’s behaviour triggers us, it’s tempting to snap, shut down, over-control. But those reactions are often defences - protective layers that keep you from feeling what’s underneath: grief, longing, loneliness, shame.

This is where reparenting comes in.

Because the more compassion you can offer your younger self, the more space you create to respond - not react - to your child.

✨ If this speaks to you, my Reparenting Your Inner Child audio course is available - and it includes a bonus mini guide on how to reparent while you’re parenting.

02/11/2025

If you grew up in a home where love felt conditional - on being good, quiet, helpful, or never causing trouble - you might still be carrying that pattern.

As a child, people-pleasing kept you safe. As an adult, it can leave you disconnected from your own needs.

This post is for the ones who learned to read the room before they knew how to read. The ones who took care of everyone else - and called it being “mature.” The ones who learned it was safer to be liked than to be real.

That pattern didn’t start with you. But healing it can.

My audio course, Reparenting Your Inner Child, will gently walk you through seven powerful lessons to help you: 
✨ Understand how your earliest experiences shaped your nervous system, beliefs, and patterns
✨Recognise when a younger part of you is running the show - and respond with care instead of self-criticism or shame
✨Offer yourself the nurturing, protection, and play you may have missed growing up
✨ Stop repeating the same old patterns - and start showing up for yourself in ways you never knew were possible

💕

31/10/2025

Sometimes the traits we were most praised for as children - being easy, agreeable, low-maintenance - were actually adaptations.

When conflict didn’t feel safe, we learned to avoid it.

When emotions weren’t welcome, we learned to suppress them.

When love felt conditional, we learned to earn it by being “good.”

And those patterns didn’t just disappear -
we carried them into our adult relationships, our boundaries, our sense of self.

What looks like “maturity” is sometimes hyper-vigilance.
What sounds like “chill” is sometimes fear.
What feels like “being good” is sometimes self-abandonment.

That’s why I find inner child work so powerful.

It helps us understand where these patterns began - and gives us the tools to gently choose something different. 🧑‍🧒✨

If this resonates, you’ll love my Reparenting Your Inner Child audio course - a 7-day journey to understand, soothe, and reconnect with the parts of you that had to grow up too soon.

30/10/2025

☁️ ✨

29/10/2025

Honestly, a good therapist will want to you to say these things.

It might feel awkward but some of the most powerful moments in therapy happen when you have the courage to say the things you think you *shouldn’t* say

Remember, therapy is for YOU. You don’t need to be polite or let your worry about your therapist’s feelings stop you from expressing yourself authentically.

A good therapist will want to hear about *all* of your feelings. ❤️

28/10/2025

For many of us, the boundary-setting era was a sacred reclamation. We needed it.

But maybe now, your nervous system is no longer in survival mode - and your heart is craving something *more* than just solo-safety.

So if you’ve been feeling a little more isolated lately…
It might be worth asking:
Are my boundaries helping me feel safe - or are they keeping me alone?

25/10/2025

In an ideal world, our childhood homes would’ve been places of unconditional care - where we felt safe, soothed, and fully seen. But many of us didn’t get that.

Maybe our parents were too overwhelmed, unsupported, or unequipped. Now, as adults, we’re often left with a nervous system on high alert - and self-sabotaging patterns that leave us feeling unhappy, unfulfilled and unwell.

That’s where reparenting comes in.

It’s the practice of tending to your own needs - now - with the care, protection, and joy you may have missed back then. Not to fix the past, but to change the present.

As a therapist, I’ve seen inner child work be the missing piece for so many people — the thing that finally helped things shift. It might be the same for you.

My Reparenting Your Inner Child course isn’t just about *understanding* inner child work. It’s about *practising* it.

🎧 7 audio lessons
📝 Journalling prompts
🧑‍🧒 A gentle meditation to meet your inner child
🖊️ Scripts to help you write to your inner child
🧒 A bonus mini-guide: Reparenting While Parenting

Link in bio - get instant access ❤️

24/10/2025

When I work with clients, there’s an exercise I often guide them through: writing a letter to their inner child.

One sentence we often begin with is:
✨ It was never your job to…

This sentence is especially powerful for clients who were *parentified* - children who had to take on adult responsibilities far too soon. The caretakers. The peacekeepers. The ones who never got to fall apart.

Inside my Reparenting Your Inner Child course, I guide you through this letter-writing process step by step.

This isn’t about blaming others. It’s about no longer blaming yourself for what you were never meant to carry 💞

🌱 The Reparenting Your Inner Child course is open now.

Seven guided lessons to help you meet, validate, and care for the child you once were - and finally lay down what was never yours to carry. 💕

Address

The Courtyard House, Units 2-7 Taylor’s Yard, 170 Brick Lane
London
E16RU

Website

https://www.therapywithabby.co.uk/

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