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Therapy with Abby

09/04/2026

We’ve been taught that nervous system work is about calming down. But that’s only part of the story.

You can have all the tools, all the insight, understand your patterns inside out…and still feel like you’re right at the edge of what you can handle.

That’s usually not a regulation problem.

It’s a capacity problem.

This is the shift I’ve been exploring in my own life, and in the work I do with clients - not just how to feel better in the moment, but how to expand what your nervous system can actually hold.

More emotion.
More rest.
More uncertainty.
More of your life.

If this resonated, comment SHIFT and I’ll send you the details of something new I’ve been building. ✨

06/04/2026

Real transformation requires letting go ✨

03/04/2026

I’ve been thinking about something a therapist said to me years ago.

This was before I was a therapist myself. At the time, my life looked…together. But internally, it didn’t feel like that.

I was always slightly braced. Jaw clenched before I’d even got out of bed. Mind scanning for problems that hadn’t happened yet. And when I wasn’t anxious, I’d swing the other way - flat, foggy, shut down.

So I did what most people do. I learned the tools. Breathing, grounding, journalling. I got very good at regulating myself.

And it helped.
Just not in the way I expected.

Because underneath it all, there was this niggling question: why does this still feel like so much effort?

I remember saying that in therapy once.
“I’m doing all the right things… but I still don’t feel like I’m coping with life very well.”

And she said:

The problem isn’t that you’re not coping well enough. It’s that you’re coping all the time.

That really stayed with me.

Because coping matters - it helps in the moment. But it doesn’t change what your system can hold. You’re still living inside the same limits. Just managing them better.

And I think a lot of people are living like that. Functioning and holding it all together. But finding life quietly quite effortful.

For me, things only really shifted when the work changed. Less about managing myself…and more about expanding what I could actually hold.

Not that life got easier. But it stopped feeling like everything might tip me over.

There’s just… more room now.

And that changes everything.

That’s the work I’m interested in now. Not just helping you feel better in the moment…but helping you build the capacity to hold more.

I’m opening the doors to The Capacity Shift soon - an 8-week guided experience designed to do exactly that.

Comment SHIFT and I’ll send you the details. ✨

02/04/2026

Your nervous system doesn’t need constant calm - it needs safety 🌼

31/03/2026

When we’re overwhelmed, stressed, or spiralling, the part of the brain responsible for perspective and problem-solving (the prefrontal cortex) goes a little offline.

Which means no matter how hard you try, thinking your way out of it usually doesn’t work.

What *does* help is tending to your body first.

Slowing your breath.
Moving.
Grounding.
Pausing.

✨ Regulation before reflection ✨

Because clarity tends to come *after* the storm has passed.

Decisions feel easier once your system has settled.

So if you find yourself in a spiral, see if you can remember this:

You don’t need to figure everything out right now. Your only job in this moment is to soothe your system. The rest can wait. ❤️

—————————-

If this resonates, you might be interested in my new programme, The Capacity Shift.

It’s an 8 week guided experience - all about building a nervous system that doesn’t get overwhelmed so easily in the first place.

Comment SHIFT and I’ll send you all the details 🙌

27/03/2026

Being good at reading people is often a form of hypervigilance.

Your nervous system learned early on that it was safer to focus on them than to stay with yourself.

This is why I won’t stop talking about the need for both nervous system work AND inner child work.

Because your nervous system isn’t just responding to what’s happening now.

It carries the imprint of everything that’s happened to you - especially what happened when you were small.

So healing isn’t just about calming your body.

It’s about working with the patterns your system learned back then.

That’s the work inside The Capacity Shift. ✨

Not just helping your nervous system settle, but expanding what it can hold.

By working with the body, your emotions,
and the underlying patterns driving it all.

26/03/2026

✨ Something new is coming ✨

An 8-week guided experience for people who are ready for more space, more ease, and more capacity in their nervous system.

If you want to be the first to see it, comment SHIFT and I’ll send you the details. 💓

22/03/2026

I see this so often at the moment. People trying *really hard* to feel better - stacking tools, routines, protocols…and somehow ending up feeling worse.

It’s not that tools are “bad” (I personally love my sauna blanket and my red light mask)

But when there is *pressure* behind them I think it can do more harm than good.

You don’t need a nervous system that feels perfectly regulated and calm all the time. You need a nervous system that has CAPACITY.

When nervous system capacity grows, it’s not only your ability to handle stress that changes. Your capacity for joy, presence, patience, creativity and connection expands too.

This is exactly what I’ll be teaching inside The Capacity Shift. Comments SHIFT below and I’ll send you the waitlist link. ✨

20/03/2026

Becoming someone new isn’t just a mindset shift.

It asks your nervous system to tolerate things that once felt unsafe.

And what I see so often - in my work and in myself - is that this is where people get stuck.

Not because they don’t want to change, but because their system doesn’t yet know how to hold it.

This is the work I care most about now.

Not just helping you *cope* better - but helping you expand what your nervous system can hold so you can actually step into the life you want.

If this resonates, I’m opening something soon that goes deeper into this work.

You can join the waitlist via the link in my bio ✨

17/03/2026

If this resonated, this is exactly what I’ll be teaching inside The Capacity Shift.

Not just how to calm down - but how to increase your nervous system capacity so you can handle more of life without feeling overwhelmed by it.

Comment SHIFT below and I’ll send you the waitlist link. ✨

14/03/2026

Something new is coming 👀

04/03/2026

So many of us were taught to minimise what we didn’t receive.

“My parents did their best.”
“Other people had it worse.”
“It wasn’t that bad.”

And often those things are true.

But grief doesn’t require a villain.
It simply recognises that something important was missing.

maybe it was emotional safety.
maybe it was protection.
maybe it was someone who noticed when you were struggling.
maybe it was space to be messy, playful, or vulnerable without fear.

When those needs go unmet, we don’t just leave them behind in childhood.

This is the work of reparenting.

Not blaming the past or staying stuck in it. But learning how to offer yourself the care, protection, and compassion you needed back then.

That’s exactly what I explore in my Reparenting Your Inner Child audio course - a gentle, reflective series designed to help you understand your patterns, reconnect with younger parts of yourself, and start building a different relationship with yourself.

If this post resonated with you, the course might be a supportive next step.

You can find the details in the link in my bio. ✨

Address

The Courtyard House, Units 2-7 Taylor’s Yard, 170 Brick Lane

E16RU

Website

https://www.therapywithabby.co.uk/

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