22/06/2022
LIFE COACH POST - HOW I COPE WITH A TRIGGERING DAY
Every year for my mothers birthday, we would go to the races. Mum, my dad, and me; our little family. Her favourite race day, at usually fell ON her birthday, or a couple days before/after. It was always a beautiful day - fun, wholesome, and nearly always beautiful weather.
After she passed away, I dreaded her birthday coming around. Not just her birthday I guess, but every anniversary. Of course, this is really common for people suffering with grief.
A few months after Mum passed away, we had the Salisbury Racecourse correspondence posted through our letterbox. Dad and I looked at each other, unsure whether it was the right thing to do, to ‘carry on’ the tradition, without Mum.
Today was our 3rd Race Day without Mum (would have been 4th but, global pandemic and all…). It’s a few days before her birthday this year, but we still toast her. I try to pick horses that Mum would like, or the names that remind me of her. My favourite today was Forest Demon, reminding me of her smashing around the New Forest on her ponies when she was young, with her sister . We reminisced about this today; so special.
How do I cope with triggering days? It’s hard. But I find it so important to make the most of special days, making special memories, and loving special people.
I will always miss my Mum at the races, but I’ll be damn sure to go every year I can, and make a day that would otherwise be empty and sad, a celebration of my Ma. I am grateful that her memory lives on, and she is responsible for showing me a flipping good time.
Give your loved ones a hoorah, and remember them with a smile. X
Love you, Mum. Happy Birthday.
How do YOU cope with days that are triggering?
PS - here’s a pic of me and my race day get up. 👗