01/12/2025
The past 3 months have been the most challenging in my life so far. I have been in a severe IBD flare which has literally knocked me off my feet. I have self managed without drugs for 15 years and for that I am thankful, but Since having my kids my body has struggled to manage the stressors of life more (I also have hEDS which adds complexity to the nature of the ibd).
It's a lonely walk when you can't see someone's illness. A few people have tried to relate to me saying 'yes I get IBS too'. But IBS is very different to IBD.
IBD is an autoimmune condition of which the root cause isn't fully understood and varies significantly from one person to another. Diet looks very different from person to person. For me, I've always tried to pay attention to my nutrition as I know that plays a big part, but stress is the biggest risk factor and I'd not been managing that.
EDS drives inflammation, so does perimenopause (which I'm well and truly in!)
It's exhausting when the medical system doesn't connect the dots between symptoms and that adds stress to my journey back to health.
But I believe everything in life can teach us something if we let it.
I'm learning total surrender through this process.
I'm learning to be more compassionate towards myself. I'm the classic woman who outwardly displays love and compassion to others, but I've not been good at extending that love and grace to myself.
My children are my priority so I need to be well for them first. Everywhere outside of home I'm replaceable, but I'm not to my family.
I've been reminded that nothing blooms all the time so why should I?
As the Bette Midler song the Rose has reminded me 'just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snow, lies the seed that with the sun's love, in the spring becomes the rose'.
I'm eternally grateful for a very loving and supportive husband who has extended love and grace to me throughout this season.
I'm hoping to be back at work in the NY and doing what I love; helping people on their health and wellbeing journeys. But for now, I'm taking care of me and going as slow as needed to recover.