11/12/2025
Nothing erodes a woman's self-worth more than being with a man who is s*xually uncontained.
When a man watches p**n, follows Instagram models, checks out women on the street, flirts with other women...
His partner can't help but feel she is of low value to him.
And over time she will either start believing she is of low value, leave him, or have an affair to feel valued again.
The problem is that our culture not only condones s*xual leakiness in men, it encourages it and preys on it.
From a young age men's attention is stolen by the misuse of the shadow feminine.
Advertising, music videos, movies and tv shows... everywhere a young man turns there is the tease of s*x right there in his face, yet always out of reach.
And it never stops.
Because the masculine yearns for the feminine... he wants to be close to her and connected to her.
He wants intimacy with her.
He is curious about her s*xually, as is only natural for a young man feeling the rush of hormones pulsing through his growing body.
Yet rather than his natural curiosity being educated, loved and nurtured... it's twisted.
His attention is stolen from him and only made worse by women being taught the same...
That for her, the way to gain connection from the masculine is to use her s*x.
Young women realise that they can indeed use their s*x to get his attention.
So the game is on.
And everyone ends up losing.
Men grow up addicted to grasping for s*x with his attention... unable to control his own awareness that spills out anywhere and everywhere that a bit of supple feminine skin is on display.
Women grow up both despising how easy it is to manipulate a man's s*x... and simultaneously believing this is the only way that they can gain his love and devotion.
In the end, far too many women end up with an impossible choice to make - use the exhibition of her s*x to win the game... or resign herself to never feeling fully s*xually safe with a man.
Neither option leaves her feeling good.
And sadly, as much as men try to explain away their impulse to look at women as a natural part of who they are... we don't actually feel good about it.
Because a man who cannot control his own attention, who cannot direct his s*xual intent to ONLY the places and women that he CHOOSES to... is weak.
Deep down he knows it.
He knows how little mastery he has over his own life.
Sadly at this point in our cultural evolution, s*xually contained man are rare.
So rare that any man who can develop this kind of mastery over his own s*xual attention becomes 1 in 10,000.
He stands out immediately.
Women can feel how safe he is in his immovability.
It makes him incredibly attractive.
And it's what makes a man 'high value'.
Because he values himself enough to not get caught up in the losing game of attention manipulation.
A woman next to such a man will radiate with bliss, satisfaction and insatiable desire for him, and only him.
Because she feels truly safe... and through that she feels so valued, so cherished, so wanted... that she can't help but shine.
This is the next level for men in our culture to learn.
~ Damien Bohler
Art: same
Sacred Divine Masculine
