09/04/2026
You personalise everything.
When someone doesn’t show up for you in your grief, you think they don’t care.
When your family argues about how to honour your loved one, you think they’re being difficult.
When someone says the wrong thing, you replay it over and over, feeling hurt.
But most of the time, it’s not about you.
They’re in pain too.
They don’t know how to be with you because you’re grieving and they don’t know what to say.
They step away because they’re scared, not because they don’t care.
They argue about the memorial because they’re trying to control something in a situation where they feel powerless.
When you step above it and look from a higher perspective, everything changes.
Instead of feeling attacked, you see the pain.
Instead of feeling abandoned, you see the fear.
Instead of feeling misunderstood, you see that everyone is just doing their best with what they know.
This is the work I do with my clients.
I had one recently whose family wanted to honour her loved one’s anniversary one way, and she wanted to do it differently.
She felt hurt. Like they weren’t listening to her. Like her grief didn’t matter.
But when we stepped above it, she realised something.
They were all grieving.
They all loved this person.
They were all in pain.
And instead of it becoming “my way or your way,” it became “our way.”
Because at the end of the day, what tied them together wasn’t the disagreement.
It was the love they all had for the person who passed.
This higher perspective doesn’t just help with grief.
It helps with everything.
Divorce. Work. Relationships. All of it.
When you stop personalising and start seeing from above, you realise:
This isn’t happening to me.
This is happening for me.
And sometimes, it’s not even about me at all.
If you’re ready to step into that higher perspective, link in bio to book a clarity call.
