Sandra Schmidt, Psychotherapy in Parenting & Relationships

13/02/2026

With Valentine’s just around the corner… I’m curious.

What do you truly think about it?

Do you feel it’s overrated?
Do you believe romance needs to be celebrated on one specific day?

I like to think every day is an opportunity to show love and care, without pressure, without expectations, and without spending hundreds on gifts or overpriced roses that barely last the week.

How many feel obligated, because if no flowers arrive, they’ll never hear the end of it?
And how many do it spontaneously, just because it feels right?

And what about those without a partner, who are valuing friendships, or learning to value themselves more deeply?

Each to their own, of course.

For me, I prefer being surprised on an ordinary day.
Not joining the rush on one commercialised day.

But here’s the part that matters most,

The most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself.

When you treat yourself with respect and care, you build a lifelong romance that doesn’t depend on anyone else.
Love becomes something you carry, not something you wait for.

And for anyone who feels lonely around this time… remember, you don’t have to share the wine.
There’s freedom in that too.

And maybe spare a thought for those grieving a partner, or quietly finding this season hard, especially when social media fills with roses and grand gestures.

Just something to reflect on.

02/02/2026

Facebook doesn’t always show posts, so I’m sharing more on Instagram.
If you’d like to stay connected, that’s the best place to find me. 🌺

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02/02/2026

Everyday example (very relatable)

A real-life bid looks like this:

One partner says,
“Do you want to watch something together?”

The other says,
“Not now, I’m wrecked.”

That wasn’t rejection — it was a missed moment.

A turn toward might sound like:
“Not right now, but I’d love to later. Can we check in after dinner?”

Same boundary.
Different nervous system impact.

01/02/2026

The questions at the end, invite conversation, not defensiveness.
They open the door, they don’t push anyone through it.❣️

01/02/2026

You can’t build a safe relationship with someone who doesn’t look at themselves.
If every issue becomes your fault,
if there’s no reflection, no repair, no ownership,
safety never gets a chance to grow!

☀️

31/01/2026

Questions to ponder in..

💥 When did you learn that you had to explain yourself to stay safe?

💥 What happens in your body when you don’t explain?

💥 Who do you over-explain to the most?

30/01/2026

Burnout doesn’t always look like collapse,
Sometimes it looks like a body that never fully switches off.

Waking tired.

Always braced.

Rest that doesn’t land.
That’s not laziness.

That’s a nervous system that learned it wasn’t safe to power down.

Nothing here means you’re broken.

It means you’ve been adapting for a long time.

💥 Which slide did your body recognise first?

28/01/2026

Awareness is the first step.
Change comes after.

28/01/2026

When we ask “what happened?” instead of “what’s wrong?”
everything shifts...

💥 question
Is this stress buffered by connection and care?
Who is helping this child regulate, or are they alone with it?
What would repair look like here?🌺

27/01/2026

Children don’t get over what they don’t get support with, they adapt to it.

Developmental trauma shapes how we feel, relate, and cope long before we have language for it.
Healing starts when we stop asking “What’s wrong with me?”
and begin asking “What happened, and what do I need now?”🌺

27/01/2026

So please remember, grief is not a problem to be solved.
It’s an experience to be lived, at your pace, in your way…

💥 The question is:
What happens when we stop trying to fix it and start allowing it?

26/01/2026

Grief lives in the nervous system, not just the heart or mind.
Be gentle with yourself.
Your body is doing its best to survive a loss.🌺