20/02/2026
One thing that really shocked me after moving to the UK?
How people truly mind their business.
And I donāt mean it in a bad way.
I just meanā¦ they really do.
On our previous street, we lived there for almost two years. Two years and I didnāt know my neighbourās name.
We would see each other, exchange that small, polite smile, and that was it. Everyone back into their houses. No conversations, no āhow are the kids?ā No random knock. No āIām going to Tesco, do you need anything?ā
At first, it felt cold to me.
Because where I am coming from in Nigeria, that kind of distance is almost impossible. Your neighbour knows your name, your childrenās names, and probably what you cooked last night. Community is not something you try to build, itās just there.
So this level of privacy? E come confuse me, bayi.
Sometimes i would even overthink the smile, is it friendliness? is it just politeness? Am i meant to stop and talk? Or is that intrusive?
Itās normal here, itās their culture and way of life, people respect space.
But i wonāt lie, i still question it sometimes.
How do people live side by side for years and never connect beyond āhelloā?
Now, our current neighbourhood is different and warmer. I know at least two neighbours by name. I know what they do. Theyāve asked how weāre settling in.
And i canāt explain the relief that comes with that.
Interestingly, Iāve noticed that when thereās any form of danger or something unusual happening, everyone suddenly becomes alert. Curtains shift, reports starts flying upandanš They say itās a duty they owe the society..see something, say something..whatever that is.
So itās not that people donāt care.
They just careā¦ differently.
And Iām still adjusting.
Migration really humbles you and has really humbled me. It forces you to question what you thought was ānormal.ā
Iām learning that integration doesnāt mean erasing where youāre from. It means choosing what to carry forward.
And honestly, Iām still figuring out what that looks like for me.
