25/09/2025
Nighttime parenting.
Somehow, over time, a strange and unrealistic belief about baby sleep has developed.
The myth that parenting is a daytime activity, and shouldn't be necessary at night.
That babies need to learn how to 'sleep through the night' as quickly as possible, because parents aren't supposed to parent at night.
That our little ones should turn off at 7pm and turn back on at 7am, and in between, parents are supposed to have a 12 hour break.
This is HUGELY problematic, on so many levels.
Parents spend so much time fighting to make this happen, battling with unrealistic expectations and the subsequent confusion when their little one doesn't conform.
They wonder whether they have done something wrong, whether they made a mistake by rocking their baby, feeding their baby to sleep, responding to their baby's cries (nope, no bad habits there!).
They worry that their little one isn't getting enough 'consolidated sleep' at night, because they wake every 3 hours, and surely that's not right?? (it's perfectly healthy!)
The reality is that parenting at night is incredibly important for your little one's development. Their tummies are small and they need milk throughout the night (some nights more than others), their brains are processing and developing as they sleep and sometimes they need reassurance or comfort. Their teeth are coming through and causing pain that they don't understand. And there are so many other things going on for them at night.
So no, this myth is absolutely not true. Parenting is not an exclusively daytime activity. And parenting at night IS important.
But as they get older, they'll become increasingly independent at night, and they'll need us less and less. When they're developmentally ready. As humans have done for millennia.
In the meantime, just know that parenting your child at night is not a bad habit, and you're not doing something wrong. You are helping them to grow and develop healthily.
The Gentle Mama
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