03/10/2025
At Melissa Teo Surgery & The Surgical Oncology Clinic, we believe life after surgery is not just about survival — it’s about confidence, dignity, and living fully again. 💪✨ Supporting our patients beyond the operating room so they can thrive every step of the way. 🌸
“Living with dignity after stoma surgery”
“Caring for a person with a stoma is also about helping them find peace and providing them emotional support.”
“On a quiet April morning, in a busy hospital ward, the care team met Madam Lee for the first time. Just a few hours before this, she had undergone an emergency operation that would change her life forever.
The surgery on the large intestines left her not only with a sizeable abdominal wound but also a stoma, a surgically created opening in the abdomen to divert waste out of the body. This is done when the natural route is no longer possible, usually as a result of severe inflammation, tumour or injury of the colon. The stoma is by the cut end of the intestine, and waste is collected in a stoma bag or pouch attached to the skin.
Madam Lee was quiet initially, her eyes staring into the distance, when she was told about her condition and the likelihood that it would be permanent. She nodded politely as I stayed by her bedside, gently explaining the care process, showing her the pouch, answering questions she didn’t think to ask yet. But I sensed she was struggling to come to terms with the outcome of the surgery.
“Let the disease take its course,” she said later to the medical team, making known her decision to refuse further treatment. “What kind of life is this with a bag stuck to your body?”
The next day, I returned. I pulled up a chair beside her and said to her: “Madam Lee… it’s okay to be angry. It’s okay to feel sad. But can I walk this road with you? Just one day at a time.”
That day, she cried. So, did I.
Over time, she revealed her fears – not of pain or death, but of living differently.
“How can I go back to my dancing class?”“What if the bag leaks while I’m dancing the cha-cha?”“What if it smells… and people stare?”
Her biggest fear was not medical in nature. It was about losing her dignity, freedom and joy.
We worked through it – together. I showed her odour-control techniques, discreet pouch covers, even stoma belt options that could hold everything in place while she danced. I encouraged her to practise basic steps in the ward when she was ready. She laughed shyly the first time – but then her hips moved just a little, and that spark came back.
Seven years have passed since that April. Madam Lee is coping well with her stoma, and we’re still in touch.
For many, the word stoma triggers fear and shame, making stoma creation one of the most emotionally challenging procedures in colore**al cancer care. As a general surgery nurse, I have heard countless patients cry, “Why me? I would rather die than carry a stoma bag.”
The harsh reality is colore**al cancer is the second most common cancer in Singapore. Early screening and detection for those over 50 years old improves both prognosis and treatment choices.
Stoma care remains poorly understood, and the social challenges are profound. Patients often feel isolated, anxious, and fearful of being judged when they have a stoma. This stigma not only affects their quality of life but also delays acceptance and rehabilitation, even when the surgery goes well.
My late father was diagnosed with lower re**al tumour that required life-saving surgery, leaving him with a permanent stoma in 2002. He was a healthy man who was devoted to farming, and this news devastated him. We faced daily struggles with persistent leakage issues around the stoma appliances and emotional distress, but also our resilience and love for him made us determined to adapt. Caring for my dad has since shaped my advocacy for better support systems for patients and families.
Clinical outcomes are only part of the treatment and recovery process. Healing also requires trust, empathy, education and human connections.
Building rapport, often in a patient’s native dialect, can help transform the nurse-patient relationship. Experiential teaching helps. At times, we guide patients with a simple exercise by placing a stoma bag filled with water on the abdomen, allowing them and their families to imagine life post-surgery.
At first, many recoil at the idea, imagining it to be unbearable or shameful. Yet, once they get to experience what the bag feels like in a safe environment, they slowly realise that life with a stoma is manageable. What begins with resistance often changes into a decision to accept surgery – and fight.
At Khoo Teck Puat Hospital (KTPH), patients are regularly reviewed post-surgery, and we show them ways to be more comfortable and independent.
We also put patients directly in touch with stoma nurses who can guide them, especially for skin concerns or when the appliance leaks frequently. This also enables complications to be detected early and prevents unnecessary emergency visits.
Moving forward, we need to talk more openly about stomas to help patients feel less isolated.
We also need more education for patients and their caregivers so that patients can regain independence with practical knowledge.
Expanding networks, such as a support group, allows patients and caregivers to connect with others who share similar experiences. This year’s World Ostomy Day to be marked at KTPH on Oct 4 will feature talks by medical experts, patient stories, a sexologist’s insight, and physiotherapy workshops.
Finally, we feel stronger financial support can help reduce the significant burden of costly stoma appliances and accessories.
World Ostomy Day, celebrated every three years, is more than a symbolic occasion. Besides raising awareness; this day is about affirming dignity, resilience, and inclusion.
Madam Lee didn’t just survive with a stoma – she reinvented her life. She found strength in her scars, grace in her gait, and rhythm in her recovery. She even returned to her beloved square dance and cha-cha group – with the stoma bag and all.”
She tells everyone now: “A stoma didn’t stop my dancing. It didn’t stop my swagger.”
(Chong Joon Lan is Senior Staff Nurse and Surgical Specialty Nurse at Khoo Teck Puat Hospital, and Organising Chair, World Ostomy Day 2025, Singapore)
