02/10/2026
Red Flags in Riding Instructors
We talked about red flag STUDENTS... the nightmare clients who make instructors question their sanity but let's flip it.
What about red flag INSTRUCTORS? The trainers who take your money while wasting your time, damaging your confidence, or worse... harming horses?
I know a few trainers that should read this list and take the time for a little self reflection ;)
🚩 RED FLAG: TALKING BADLY ABOUT STUDENTS (Behind Their Back OR To Their Face)
I'm not talking about constructive criticism. Some people can be overly sensitive and interpret any correction as "mean." This red flag is actual sh*t-talking, mocking, and belittling students in front of others.
There's a huge difference between...
Constructive feedback: "Your position needs work - let's focus on keeping your shoulders back and heels down."
Belittling/mocking: "Wow, you look ridiculous up there. I can't believe you still can't figure this out. My 8-year-old students ride better than you."
I recently had a lesson with a "highly acclaimed" trainer who started mocking and belittling a young girl right to me during this kid's lesson where the kid could certainly hear the insults. I was disgusted by the trainer's attitude and treatment towards this young girl and never went back.
Why this is a red flag:
- Shows complete lack of professionalism and basic human decency
- **If they talk about OTHER students like that, they're talking about YOU like that too **
- Creates toxic, competitive environment
- Destroys student confidence
- Bullying behavior has no place in teaching
What it tells you: This instructor has serious character issues and doesn't respect their students.
When to leave: IMMEDIATELY. One instance of instructor trash-talking students (especially in front of the student!) and you're done. Find someone who actually respects the people they teach.
🚩 RED FLAG: POOR HORSE CARE (Neglected, Unhealthy Horses)
Horses who are:
- Underweight or obviously neglected
- Living in filthy conditions
- Sour, resistant, unhappy in their work
- Using dead lame, head bobbing horses (I don't mean serviceably sound horses that can be kept comfortable for toting around kids in the lower levels here and there.)
- Tack that doesn't fit or is in disrepair
- No access to clean water or adequate food
Why this is a red flag:
- If they don't care for their horses, they don't care about horsemanship
- Ethical instructors prioritize horse welfare FIRST
- You're learning from someone with no moral compass
- Creates safety issues (lame horses are unpredictable)
- Shows what they truly value (money over wellbeing)
What it tells you: This person should not be teaching anyone about horses.
When to leave: Immediately and honestly? Report it if horses are genuinely neglected. You don't want to learn from someone who abuses animals.
🚩 RED FLAG: CHRONIC LATENESS (Disrespecting Your Time)
I am not talking about showing up late once because of a genuine emergency. We are talking about an instructor being chronically late to many lessons. Often with no apology and no accountability.
I had a horse on training board recently (because I believe professionals should still take lessons from other professionals as there is always something new to learn) and the trainer was routinely late to half of my lessons. I took 4-5 lessons per week and this trainer would set the schedule in the first place. At times she would be up to 45 mins late even though I could see she was in her house right across from the barn. Sometimes I had to cancel my lesson entirely if I had a busy schedule and couldn't wait. Of course I no longer ride with this trainer, my time is valuable and not to be abused.
Why this is a red flag:
- Shows complete disrespect for your time
- Demonstrates lack of professionalism
What it tells you: They don't value you or your business. You're not a priority. Time for many of us a luxury and not to be wasted especially when many of us have to watch our time due to work or family obligations, etc.
🚩 RED FLAG: UNSAFE PRACTICES (Putting Students at Risk)
Not appropriate challenges that build skills and may push you slightly out of your comfort zone.
Actually dangerous situations:
- Putting beginners on unsuitable horses
- Ignoring safety protocols
- Horses that are clearly too much for the rider
- Equipment in poor/dangerous condition
Why this is a red flag:
- Shows instructor prioritizes pushing students over keeping them safe
- Liability nightmare waiting to happen
- Demonstrates poor judgment
- Could result in serious injury or death
What it tells you: This instructor doesn't understand risk management or doesn't care.
When to leave: The FIRST time you feel genuinely unsafe (**not challenged - UNSAFE**), find a new instructor. Your safety isn't negotiable.
🚩 RED FLAG: ABUSIVE TRAINING METHODS
Not firm or direct instruction.
Actually abusive:
- Yelling, screaming, belittling
- Physical intimidation
- Cruel training methods toward horses
- Excessive force or punishment
- Making students cry regularly from emotional abuse
Why this is a red flag:
- Abuse is never okay, period
- Destroys confidence instead of building it
- Traumatizes students and horses
- No place in ethical horsemanship
When to leave: Immediately. Abusive instructors cause lasting damage.
🚩 RED FLAG: INAPPROPRIATE BOUNDARIES
Not friendly, warm instructor-student relationships but actually crossing lines:
- Using students as therapists
- Romantic/sexual interest in students (HUGE red flag)
- Getting drunk/high around students
- Involving students in personal conflicts
Why this is a red flag:
- Unprofessional and potentially predatory
- You're there to learn, not manage their personal life
- Creates uncomfortable, unsafe environment
- Shows lack of professional judgment
What it tells you: This person doesn't understand professional boundaries and could be dangerous.
When to leave: Any hint of inappropriate behavior, especially romantic interest or intoxication around students - RUN. Report if necessary.
🚩 RED FLAG: NO PROGRESS (Ever)
While I wouldn't say this is as extreme of a red flag as the others listed above, this is my personal red flag which is why it is added to this list.
We are not talking about plateaus, which are normal but maybe years go by and:
- You're doing the exact same things
- No measurable improvement
- Instructor offers no progression plan
- Same exercises every single lesson
- No goals or milestones
- Just going through motions
Why this is a red flag:
- Either instructor doesn't know HOW to progress you or they're keeping you stuck to keep collecting money
- You're wasting time and money
- Riding should involve growth
IMPORTANT CLARIFICATION: I'm NOT talking about riders who want to jump after 5 lessons when they can't even post on the correct diagonal yet. We see that ALL the time in this industry... entitled riders barn-hopping because instructors rightfully hold them back from doing things they're not ready for. If your instructor says you're not ready to move up because you lack basic skills (sitting trot, correct diagonals, independent hands), they're probably RIGHT. That's not this red flag.
This red flag is: You've been taking consistent lessons for a while and you feel like you're not learning ANYTHING new. Same exercises. Same feedback. No progression plan. No new challenges. Just... stuck.
It's completely okay to outgrow your trainer. Some instructors are AMAZING at teaching beginners but don't have the skills or experience to bring riders to upper levels and that's okay! That's their niche and they should own it. Conversely, plenty of high-level professional trainers have zero desire or ability to teach walk-trot beginners. They're brilliant with advanced riders but would be terrible for someone just starting out.
Neither is better or worse... they're just different skill sets. The red flag is when an instructor keeps you at the same level indefinitely NOT because you need more foundation work but because they genuinely don't know how to progress you further. They've hit the ceiling of their own knowledge or experience, but they won't admit it or refer you to someone more qualified.
Signs this is happening:
- You've mastered the basics but get the same "work on your heels" feedback for months with no new instruction
- You ask "what's next?" and get vague non-answers
- No goals, no plan, no progression roadmap
- Other students at your level have been there for YEARS doing the same things
- You feel stagnant and bored, not challenged
When to leave: If you've genuinely outgrown what your instructor can teach you, it's time to find someone at the level you're working toward. Thank your instructor for the foundation they gave you, and move on. That's professional growth, not betrayal. Good instructors will recognize when a student has outgrown them and help facilitate the transition to someone more appropriate for the next stage.
A FINAL NOTE: YOU NEED TO ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF
I know the comments will likely be flooded with stories from students who were belittled, bullied, or mistreated by trainers and those experiences are valid. Toxic instructors cause real harm but here's the hard truth: If you're experiencing multiple red flags and you stay anyway... that's on you. You are the paying customer. You have the power to leave.
I understand that leaving can feel hard because you've invested time and money. Maybe you're attached to the horses and you have made friends at the barn. Perhaps you're worried about finding something better or the instructor has manipulated you into thinking you NEED them.
Remember, staying in a toxic situation doesn't serve you. Recognize red flags early. Speak up when boundaries are crossed and LEAVE when things don't improve.
You're not a victim if you keep choosing to stay in a situation you have the power to leave. Advocate for yourself. Set standards. Walk away when those standards aren't met.
Good instructors exist. Professional, respectful, ethical barns exist but you have to be willing to leave the bad ones to find them. 🐴
What red flags have you experienced with instructors? What made you finally leave?
