12/18/2025
SHOULD I CLOSE?
Because honestly, I’m terrified my short temper (which is, ironically, way shorter than me) and my firecracker attitude are just itching to explode on the next poor soul who needs a wake-up call!
I’m officially done being a doormat! Huge shoutout for those who don’t treat me like a human towel—you’re the real MVCs!
Sure, emergencies happen, totally understandable but NOT like when your goldfish suddenly needs a massage (classic!). But when clients cancel last minute after I’ve prepped everything and stood by the door like a golden retriever? Pure comedy! Spoiler alert: I’m absolutely worth your time!
Cancel on the same day? Sorry, no refunds! You owe me for my time—consider it therapy for putting up with your nonsense!
Thinking about a membership? Awesome! Just make sure there’s money on your card! Can’t manage that? Then. kindly take your drama elsewhere!
For those who don’t want a card on file, there’s the SERIES package—you can pay cash in full upfront. Shocking, right? No excuses!
Honestly, I’ve seriously thought about closing up shop and maybe just be a full time WITCH—but then I remember my fabulous clients who get it. So, I’m just RED FLAGGING those who clearly aren’t worth my time.
For those New Clients calling to book? Go to the website and book from there. I am done booking new clients too and not showing up!
I no longer answer any calls either. Only if you’re in my contact list.
I respond to text during week days 8am-6pm.
If you’re worth my time, I will respond right away Before or After those hours.
Be thoughtful, please never text me after 9pm to book or related to that, unless I texted you first. I will not text you that late either unless you ask me to.
Here I am: kicking the BS and tackling knots because life’s too short for pain in the A**!
And remember: if a stone falls from the sky and hits you, don’t get angry—you could’ve looked up to avoid it!
Thanks for understanding!
Melanie Turner
The moral of this venting stuff:
1. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH:
Alright, let’s set the record straight! Enough is enough! I need to take breaks too in between massages to massage my hands and forearms and hands. They’re starting to look like that rock guy from Fantastic Four—seriously, they’re begging for a break! I mean, sometimes I don’t even recognize it anymore! Sometimes it looks like T*rds! Yeah—- even me, I still can’t INSEE it. I almost like it developed a PTSD from it. So, I have been experimenting making salves to make it more like the thumbs I used to have!
2. YOU CAN’T MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY:
I can’t make everyone happy—especially those who think my sole purpose is to cater to their every whim. If I could, I’d be a massage therapist in a cheesy rom-com, but sadly, most of my clients just want to drain every ounce of energy I have.
3. SETTING BOUNDARIES:
Set some boundaries, people! Otherwise, the wolves will come out to play, and guess what? They’ll take everything I’ve got, leaving me with nothing but an empty heart and aching hands! I don’t want that!
I need both for my valued clients and for my loved ones.
4. THE MORE YOU GIVE, THE MORE THEY EXPECT.
And let’s be clear: don’t be too nice! The saying is very true!
The more you give, the more they expect.
If I run out of steam, suddenly I am the “horrible person.” Great! At least I know I’ve spent more than enough time with those who couldn’t care less once they’ve gotten what they wanted!
5. YOU CAN’T HELP PEOPLE WHO DOESN’T WANT TO HELP THEMSELVES:
I am guilty of this: I want to lose weight but food just too good!
There’s only so much I can do to help others. To make them free from pain. They must be the one to avoid things that causes the pain.
I have to remember, I can’t help those who won’t lift a finger to help themselves!
So, I will keep things real and save my strength for those who actually appreciate it!r
