Strong.Love

Strong.Love Mental Health and Relationship Tips for Men by Kristal DeSantis, LMFT, CCTP aka on Ins

12/16/2025

My TEDx talk is officially live!!!! ✨🙌

https://youtu.be/4r6zC9BzPrM?si=_tep8S6xs88fzilJ

Less than twenty-four hours ago, Why Unhappy Relationships Feel So Lonely: 4 Skills for Modern Romance went up on YouTube.
As of right now, it’s already passed 13.5K views!! Honestly, I’m still letting that sink in.. and I'm so grateful this talk is resonating with so many people.

This talk exists because I’m tired of the story we’re being sold about modern love.

The problem isn’t a gender war.
It’s not that people are “too much” or “not enough.”
It’s that we’re trying to build emotionally connected relationships using outdated maps designed for survival and function—not connection.

We were taught to partner up, but we were not taught how to relate or be successful in those partnerships!

In this talk, I share what I’ve learned from years of working with couples and individuals at the breaking point: connection isn’t magic or chemistry—it’s a set of skills. Specifically, the 4 S’s of Safety:

Self-Awareness

Stability

Self-Regulation

Self-Expression

When those skills are missing, relationships don’t just feel hard—they feel lonely, even when you’re not alone.

The response to this talk tells me something important:
People aren’t looking for sides.
They’re looking for tools.
They’re looking for a way back to each other.

If this resonates with you, I hope you’ll watch, share it with someone you love (or someone you’re struggling to love right now), and start practicing these skills together. That’s where real change happens.

Thank you for the support, the messages, and the conversations this talk is already sparking.
This is why I do this work—and I’m just getting started.

💛

12/02/2025

Holiday Builds & Bonds Fundraising Drive and Volunteer Day for Partnerships for Children

Want to change the world? Start with one child who needs to feel remembered.

This season, we're teaming up with Partnerships for Children helping 10 Texas foster kids get the Christmas they deserve.

$100 = 1 child = one unforgettable holiday.
Goal: $1,000 by December 16th.
If you’ve got heart, this is your moment.

Donate: https://strongmen.betterworld.org/campaigns/giving-kids-christmas

Want to do more than click a link? Come get hands-on.

Join us for our Builds & Bonds Volunteer Night
🗓️ December 10th
🕓 5–7 PM
📍 Partnerships for Children Warehouse

We’ll be wrapping gifts, creating joy, and proving—once again—that STRONG is love in action.

Sign Up to Volunteer: https://www.strong.love/event-details/builds-and-bonds-holiday-toy-drive-and-volunteer-day

Be the reason a kid feels seen this Christmas. Take a STRONG step toward being the change in the world you want to see.

What a great event!! Thanks to all who attended, donated, and supported this movement for Men's Health Month!! 💪💙
11/24/2025

What a great event!! Thanks to all who attended, donated, and supported this movement for Men's Health Month!! 💪💙

11/20/2025

Happy International Men's Day!

Exciting News!!!! We've teamed up with The Buzz Mill and Squatch Frontier Fitness for Men's Mental Health Month 🙌SQUATCH...
11/17/2025

Exciting News!!!! We've teamed up with The Buzz Mill and Squatch Frontier Fitness for Men's Mental Health Month 🙌

SQUATCH x STRONG RUCK 2025
A Men’s Mental Health Ruck for Movember
📅 November 23, 2025 • ⏰ 9:00 AM📍The Buzz Mill – Austin, TX

🥾 WALK. TALK. SHOW UP.
Join STRONG: The Men’s Mental Health Initiative and Squatch Fitness for a 6-mile round-trip ruck.

We’re taking big steps for men’s mental health.

🕘 Start Time: 9:00 AM (arrive early to check in)

🥾 Distance: 6 miles round trip

📍 Start & Finish: The Buzz Mill

👕 Swag: Coffee, tacos, stickers and t-shirts

💵 Suggested Donation: $20 — or just show up for the community.

💪WHY WE RUCK
Men carry a lot — and too often, they carry it alone.This isn’t just about miles. It’s about brotherhood, strength, and breaking the silence that keeps too many men stuck.

Lace up. Ruck up. Let’s walk it out together.

🙌 HOW TO JOIN
RSVP (+ donate) at the link: (live link in story)
https://www.qrrio.com/e/q5q9w5Wf

Bring your ruck (there will be rucks available if needed). *A ruck is a weighted vest, but rucks are optional! Just come walk with us.*

Bring a friend. Hell, bring two.

Be part of something bigger than yourself.

Big Feet. Bigger Hearts. Sasquatch Say "Never Walk Alone."

November Events for Strong: The Men's Mental Health Initiative !📚 Friday, Nov 21st: Books & Brews — grab a drink and joi...
11/09/2025

November Events for Strong: The Men's Mental Health Initiative !

📚 Friday, Nov 21st: Books & Brews — grab a drink and join the discussion on East of Eden by John Steinbeck.

💪 Sunday, Nov 23rd: Our first-ever RUCK Men’s Health Event with Squatch Frontier Fitness and The Buzz Mill — strength , community, and good vibes, all for a great cause.

Bring your crew — everyone’s welcome!

I’m still buzzing from this 🤩— I had the honor of presenting my STRONG Model at the American Association for Marriage an...
11/04/2025

I’m still buzzing from this 🤩— I had the honor of presenting my STRONG Model at the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy’s Systemic Family Therapy Conference — and was given a two-hour featured session to speak with clinicians all over the country!!

I introduced my STRONG Model, a trauma-informed, attachment-based framework designed to engage men in therapy — especially those often labeled “therapy-resistant.” The model helps clinicians identify masculine trauma presentations, create structured therapeutic contracts, and implement goal-oriented interventions while maintaining a strong relational focus.

Why this matters: Too many men feel like therapy wasn’t built for them. When they disengage, entire family systems lose access to the stability, emotional regulation, and intimacy that ripple outward when men are truly involved. When therapy meets men where they are, families heal faster, and relationships thrive.

Over those two hours, I connected with clinicians eager for practical, skills-based tools to reach men, first responders, veterans, and high-achievers — clients who want action, structure, and practice. The STRONG Model gives them exactly that: a framework that helps men and couples build safety, trust, and connection from the very first session.

It was incredible to share this work on a national stage and to feel the growing curiosity around the intersection of masculinity, attachment, and trauma-informed care.

Seeing how deeply this resonated reminded me why I built STRONG in the first place: to make therapy more accessible, effective, and empowering for men, their partners, and the clinicians supporting them.

I’m excited to keep expanding the conversation and reimagining therapy for modern relationships so it’s stronger, more inclusive, and more human.

While I’ve been in London for the Relational Life Therapy Conference, I decided to look around and see what else was hap...
11/01/2025

While I’ve been in London for the Relational Life Therapy Conference, I decided to look around and see what else was happening in the cultural conversation about mental health — and I’m glad I did.

First stop: Robbie Williams’ Radical Honesty exhibit at the Moco Museum London.
Part art exhibit, part therapy session, part brutally honest excerpts from an inner monologue. The humor is sharp, but the message underneath is real — honest thoughts about anxiety, self-doubt, and the weirdness of being human.

Then I saw Minnie Driver in the one-woman play Every Brilliant Thing.
Told through the eyes of a child whose parent is battling severe depression — it was emotional, powerful and an incredible interactive experience. The audience helps build a list of “every brilliant thing” worth living for, and that simple act becomes surprisingly powerful.

I deeply appreciated how thoughtfully they handled heavy themes. A Samaritans rep was onsite to support anyone who needed it, and the show wove in real education on how to talk about su***de safely.

It’s encouraging to see mental health — anxiety, depression, and everything in between — becoming part of the wider cultural conversation. Not hidden behind stigma, but recognized as part of our shared human experience.

If you plan to see either, know they touch on anxiety and su***de in real, direct ways. They’re not light — but they are powerful.

As a therapist, I’m encouraged to be working in a time when we’re empowering people to tell their stories — out loud, without shame. I’m grateful to have been a witness to these two powerful expressions of that movement.

***depreventionawareness

I’m so grateful to have spent the past two days watching Terry Real do live therapy demonstrations with two couples.Firs...
10/30/2025

I’m so grateful to have spent the past two days watching Terry Real do live therapy demonstrations with two couples.

First of all—how brave is that? Even for a seasoned therapist, doing back-to-back intensives with couples you’ve never met, while an audience of over 250 colleagues analyzes your every move? That’s brave. And these weren't "easy example clients" either. These were real couples in real distress--at their breaking points. They had all been in therapy: individually and as a couple.

Working with Terry was their crucible moment.

Watching him work, there were moments of real struggle—stuck points, tension, discomfort—but the courage to stay in it, to challenge people to go deeper, to find their points of connection is exactly what defines his work. There were moments of tension and risk that even challenged the therapeutic audience—and that’s exactly the point.

As Terry said:
"Keeping people safe in their comfort zone isn’t the goal. Change is.”

That landed.
Because in my own work, I want clients to feel seen, honored, and safe—but also challenged to change. Sometimes empathy opens the door; sometimes confrontation does.

And without leaning too heavily on gender binaries, it’s worth saying: therapy can sometimes feel too soft, too focused on process, empathy, and feelings—leaving many men (and plenty of women) feeling unseen or disengaged. Terry brings a refreshing directness. His message is simple but radical: Love without honesty isn’t love at all.

Therapy has become democratized—and that’s a good thing. More people have language for what they’re feeling. But with that accessibility has come a dilution of accountability. The buzzwords have outpaced the responsibility they require.

Terry’s work is a reminder that empathy without accountability is just enabling.

Naming without changing isn’t healing—it’s just looping the same pain with better vocabulary.

What our field needs now isn’t more jargon.

It’s courage.

The courage to love people honestly enough to call them higher. To a new vision of love and relationships. To challenge us all to embody the bravery that love truly deserves.

Address

Austin, TX

Website

https://linktr.ee/atxtherapist

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