01/06/2026
This is a fantastic visual from www.SocialWorkersToolbox.com.
Here’s something you may not know about me - decades before my autism diagnosis: I almost failed out of high school.
The anxiety, difficulty initiating tasks, freeze response from constant adrenaline, and limited social skills made going to school feel unbearable. Every day felt like survival mode.
What most people saw were the behaviors.
What they didn’t see was the nervous system overload underneath.
Bright lights, loud hallways, unpredictable social demands, and constant communication pushed my system past capacity. Eventually, even walking into the building could trigger a fast, loud meltdown - visible to everyone, but misunderstood by most.
From an occupational therapy and mental health lens, this wasn’t defiance or lack of effort. It was:
Sensory overload
Chronic anxiety
Nervous system dysregulation
Exhaustion from constant coping
A body stuck in fight, flight, or freeze
So how did things improve?
Not by forcing compliance.
Not by “trying harder.”
It was family communication, therapy, and adults who were willing to understand what my nervous system was communicating.
This is why resources like The School Refusal Iceberg matter so much today.
Parents and families now have access to information we didn’t have then - and that matters. A small shift in understanding can completely change a child’s experience.
School refusal is not bad behavior.
It’s a stress response.
And behavior is communication.
Just a little understanding can go a very long way. 🌱
