Lisa M. Kelsey, MFT

11/18/2025

Reflections Day 1883: Tonight my mom and I decorated my Christmas tree, thanks Mom. This was kind of a big deal for me as last year I didn't decorate my tree. That was the first year ever of not decorating my tree. It was too hard to and yet so sad to see it undecorated. My friend was going to help me decorate, my mom offered, even my niece offered but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. This year I knew I couldn't let that happen and I was ready to decorate it. My favorite part of decorating the tree is reminiscing about every ornament. They each have a story, from the person that gave it to me, to the place I bought it from, and to what it reminds me of. It has been forever since my mom helped and she too was enjoying seeing all of the ornaments. She has given me so many ornaments and also given my daughter so many ornaments. There was one party foul where I broke an ornament, my mom was relieved it wasn't her as so many of them are breakable. We also had another funny moment where my mom commented on the state of my tissue paper and how some of the pieces were barely staying together and we were laughing so hard and I had to run to the bathroom to not have an accident lol. It reminded us of so many of those funny moments at my aunt's house on game nights, miss you Auntie Gilda. I hung a heart that my cousin gave us to be from my cousin/godmother that passed away. I hung a guitar that reminded me of my dad. I hung all the ornaments that my daughter made growing up and all the ornaments she and I made together. I hung ornaments that friends had made for me. I hung all the ornaments from our travels. My whole house is now decorated and all the decorations are so special to me and they too have a story as well. The holiday's are a special time and putting up the decorations are a big tradition in my family. Almost every nook has some sort of decoration, including the kitchen and bathroom. Last spot to decorate is outside, hope to finish this weekend. I couldn't have done this without my mom, love you mom, and love that you always have my back.

11/06/2025

Reflections Day 1882: Last night while driving to Kohl's to complete a return my car wasn't fully accelerating on the El Camino. I am so grateful I was able to pull into the Kohl's parking lot safely and park. I went into Kohl's to do my return and came back out to my car hopeful it was just a momentary weird thing. My car started up and I was on my way home on the El Camino and all seemed ok until right before the intersection of McClelland Drive and the El Camino where again I couldn't accelerate, and was able to pull over to park right before the intersection and the car stalled. I called AAA and they now have you pinpoint your location on your cell phone, well that wasn't working so I hung up. I called AAA again and asked to speak to someone live and at the same time I tried to start my car again and was almost across the intersection and the car stalled again and now I was blocking the far right lane. I have never had anything like this happen in my life and all 3 of these occurrences were so scary and now I am blocking the lane on the El Camino OMG. They put my tow as a priority and someone arrived about 10-15 minutes later. He had me start my car and I was low on fuel so he thought it might be no gas. I was so embarrassed as this happened many years ago right by my daughter's school St. Veronica's where I ran out of gas at McDonald's and 7 11. Every family drove by us and asked if we were ok. He towed me to a gas station, filled the tank and car started right up. He followed me home and all seemed good. Today I drove to my therapist in Burlingame, to work in SSF, to my private practice in Burlingame and I was on my way to my moms and I felt the acceleration off again, but then it recovered quickly. I got to my moms, dropped off the turkey necks for our stuffing and headed down her block. As I turned onto Dennis Drive the acceleration was off and the car died in the middle of the street. It is an awful feeling when you are stepping on the gas and the car is not moving, I was scared again, what if I can't get out of the middle of the street. I turned the car off and on again 3 times and was able to get the car up the street and make a right onto Warwick and pull over and park. My car is there now and I will tackle it first thing tomorrow morning. Thanks to my mom for picking me up and lending me her car to get myself home. Fingers crossed it is something small. I was looking for a new car last year with my daughter and we had narrowed it down to 2 gorgeous SUV's and then they didn't have all the features, colors etc we wanted. I stopped looking, however the universe may be nudging me back to looking for a new car.

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10/27/2025

Reflections Day 1881: I treasured the time this past weekend, the events I attended and the family I was with. On Friday night I attended my nieces middle school play called "Box" by Lindsay Price. She was on the communications team and handed out the programs and introduced the play. She helped everyone stay on track and led like the true Sagittarius she is. We didn't know what the play would be about, in fact my brother thought the kids had written it like we did when we were in middle school. Turned out it was about the boxes we put ourselves in, the boxes others put us in and how we navigate it all. It was so powerful and so well done. Every possible middle school issue we all had to tackle was in there. Cheers to the actors and cheers to Lindsay Prices script. My mom and I went out to try Benihana's in Foster City for dinner. I had heard mixed reviews about taste and portions and Benihana's did not disappoint. Both of our meals were to die for, tasted great and same portions as Burlingame. It brought back so many memories and fun dinners at the one in Burlingame. Glad we gave it a try. Yesterday and today I hung around the house, which isn't my usual but was nice get in walk and the gym and then to stay in my PJs and not have plans. Last night I went to Winter's Tavern in Pacifica to see my daughter sing the band Magnolia Ave perform. It was their first bar gig and they did an incredible job. I was glad to have my mom join me and my cousin and her boyfriend. Family celebrating family is what it's all about. My daughter sang 3-4 songs with the band and it was so nice to see her sharing her passion of singing with the world. The band is very talented and it was great to see her sing a few songs. At one point the crowd got really into it and moved toward the stage and were dancing. That is true testament to a band when they draw the crowd forward and get them dancing, go Magnolia Ave! Take each day as it comes and make the moments and celebrate each one.

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10/19/2025

Reflections Day 1880: Over the past several months there have been many signs. They say loved ones that have passed can come to us we just have to be aware and see the signs. My signs lately have been animals, which is very interesting as most of my life I have not been an animal person. That all changed about 5 years ago with our puppy Lia, who melted my heart and let me love her and in turn be more open to animals. She will always have a special place in my heart. The signs lately have been hummingbirds, white butterflies, squirrels, raccoons, turkey's, turkey vultures, and cats. You are probably saying what the heck is going on and I was too. Ever since my dad passed I've seen white butterflies and thought of him. In my backyard I've noticed hummingbirds and more so in the last few months. I had a medium reading a month ago and she told me that the white butterfly was actually my cousin/godmother and the hummingbird my dad. I kid you not ever since then they are in the backyard every time I go out there. Sometimes they are just there for a few seconds, sometimes a few minutes and other times the hummingbird has sat in the tree for like 5 minutes. It feels very special to know its a sign from them and I feel the love. In my trip to Napa there were turkey's first 5 at a time one day and like 10-15 the next day. I have never seen turkey's there. At my cousins about a month ago we saw turkey vultures, frogs and feathers. On the Crystal Springs path we saw a turkey vulture circling. A few weeks ago a friend and I were in the backyard trying to fix my St. Francis of Assisi statue and 3-4 hummingbirds, 2-3 other birds, the squirrel, white butterfly and monarch butterfly were all in the backyard. Two of the hummingbirds were circling around my friend as she held the statue to let the glue dry. It was like nothing I've ever seen. St. Francis had a love of animals and I think they were all excited to see the statue get fixed. There was so much positive energy in the backyard while all of this went on. Then when I arrived home from Napa a raccoon crossed in front of my garage, and then one was across the street, and then one was about 3 feet from me. Several times on my morning walks I've seen a neighborhood cat stop and stare at me. One morning the cat laid in the middle of the sidewalk and just stared at me for several laps. Today at many booths there were hummingbirds. We go to the restaurant Johnny's on Main St. in Half Moon Bay, we are in line and there is a hummingbird sketched on the door. We sit down there is a hummingbird on the back of the menu. Then my mom says, look behind you the whole wall had hummingbirds as part of the wallpaper. You can't make this all up and some may say coincidence. I say they are all messages and signs from the universe. I choose to see each of them, think about it and take them in. The raccoons I shooed away, but I looked up the meaning after. The universe is sending animals and signs my way and I'm thankful and can't wait to see what is next.

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10/12/2025

Reflections Day 1879: The past week and a half has been a whirlwind. A last minute trip to Vegas, sun, gambling, nice meal and even a little club time. Lots of laughs, some winning and peaceful walks. Then home one day and then on my way to the timeshare in Napa for some sun, cousin time and peaceful walks. I got 2 out of 3 but the weather did not cooperate. It was cloudy and a bit chilly which was a bummer. I think the universe wanted me to chill inside. One trip was sort of spur of the moment (Vegas) and one trip was planned to get through a potential hard day (Napa). The sun of course came out on the last day in Napa ugh and I was heading out. I saw a hummingbird drinking water in Vegas on my walk. I saw turkeys on both days walking in Napa, never seen turkeys. Last night I saw two raccoons right outside my house. Today the weather was beautiful on my walk and my time in the backyard. I saw a hummingbird and white butterfly in the backyard The animals were super present this past week. Taking time with friends and family,noticing the animals and putting one foot in front of the other.

10/02/2025

Reflections Day 1878: When someone touches your heart there is no better feeling. I have had this happen several times over the past few days and it has meant so much to me. Over the weekend I hosted friends for dinner and one friend went out of his way to bring my favorite wines and had asked another friend what my favorites were. This was such a sweet and kind gesture. A friend a few days ago reached out and has been reaching out to check on me and had such kind words and encouragement to share with me. So many friends and family have reached out during these past 9 months and I thank every one of them for every time they have checked in and peeked in on me. This morning my brother sent me such a beautiful, inspirational video from instagram about how he felt about me and it almost brought me tears and really grabbed my heart. Just now I read a feedback response from a fellow people leader that I work with and her kind words about our partnering and about me warmed my heart. I know many of you have seen my posts about grief, about relationships, about trauma, and about narcissism and yes all of that is true and happening. What is also true is kindness, generosity, joy, checking in and ultimately touching my heart in your actions. Thank you for sharing that with me I can't begin to tell you how much it all means. We can go through tough things and we can move forward one step at a time, one moment at a time. My heart is filled a little bit more from each kindness.

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08/28/2025

Reflections Day 1877: The uncomfortableness is so heavy today. It started last night and it was mild and as the day progressed it just got heavier and heavier. Over the past 8 months there have been holiday's, milestone events, vacations, appointments and so much I haven't been part of. Each time they happen it's so hard to not be part of them and it wears on me. I tried to go to one to see how it would be several months ago but the rejection was really hard to deal with. Last night was another event and I decided to not go. Instead I went to a movie with a friend and while F1 was great, I did think about the event. I've missed so much and it hurts my heart but I'm trying to wait, trying to be patient and trying to grieve and heal. A few times today I thought about things I could do to distract and numb and take the uncomfortableness away. I was in and out of the kitchen several times and didn't do my usual of binge eating. I thought about the casino a few times, but didn't do my usual of gambling. Instead I sat with the uncomfortableness. I was grateful for my work meetings and work that kept me focused on something else but the breaks in between this all pops up. There's so many things I wanted to do around the house but didn't. I could have gone to a work happy hour, but I didn't. I could have gone to the gym but didn't. I truly don't know if anything will change and that is so scary, sad and still unbelievable. I take each day as they come and likely tomorrow won't be as heavy as today, I hope.

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08/25/2025

Reflections Day 1876: About 9 years ago I started my journey with Reiki. When I first went I was super skeptical. The person actually said you are pretty skeptical aren't you. She could already see me; and for years would provide me with so many insights, energy shifting and open me up to so much awareness. I learned so much from her, I learned so much about me and I realized that there are many ways of working on ourselves. The more I opened to the possibilities of therapy and Reiki the more I was able to see for myself and also be able to share with clients. For the past year I was looking for a new Reiki person and today I got to meet with her. I really liked her and it felt good to get back to something that provided so much healing and awareness. She reminded me of how important it is notice the good, focus on joy and light even in the moments that have been so difficult. I've been practicing this and focused on it especially during my leave of absence. I told her about my reflections and how much I have missed writing them. My reflections were and are a way of sharing my experiences and myself with the universe. Sometimes they spark something in someone else or provide comfort, provide a chuckle in the funny ones and maybe even remind someone they aren't alone. While Reiki might not be for everyone that's ok. If it's something you might be interested in then check it out. Being supported by so many to find the healing modalities that work best for me means so much. Today in my session she sensed many supporters around me and knowing I have both people here and spiritual people in my corner oh so powerful. Part of my healing is in my sharing of my reflections and I know I will be able to share more and more as I feel drawn to. I hope whatever healing path you might be on that you can find what might help and support you.

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08/18/2025

Reflections Day 1875: Today marks the end of my leave of absence from work. While one of the main reasons I took my leave hasn’t changed, I do believe I have grown and changed. I am grieving, I am healing, I am holding boundaries, and I am not wearing a mask. All of those are huge for me. I am sitting with the discomfort and while it is no fun, it is so necessary. The more I distract, plan, fill up my time, the less time there is for the grief, for the pain, for the sorrow and for the heartache. Throughout my time off I have made plans and then realized I had to cancel them. I have set up phone calls with friends and have had to cancel them. I have overbooked a bit on a few trips and had to postpone them. I had to listen to my gut, to my heart, and to my head about how I was feeling and do what was best for me, and many times it was saying a no after saying a yes. have learned not just in the last 7 weeks but in the last almost 10 years that if we aren’t feeling it for any reason we need to speak up. I am so blessed that 99% of the time the person on the other end gets it and says I’m so glad you spoke up for what you needed. Taking this leave was speaking up for what I needed. Not easy by any means, but needed and necessary. I also spent time processing rejection. Boy was this a hard one. It was and is rejection by family and friends. I processed it and journaled about it which was hard and a good exercise. There were tears, there was disappointment and I sat with it. A little while later I started to think about all of the people that have supported me, that have reached out to me, that have checked in on me. I then reached out to each of them to say thank you. Thank you for checking in on me, thank you for supporting me and thank you for seeing what I was going through and showing your care and concern. I sat with both the rejection and the appreciation of support, both were happening and both needed to be recognized. And while a lot of this was hard stuff, I also appreciated the times with friends and creating new moments. I traveled with friends and family to casino overnights, a Vegas trip with a friend who we’ve been saying we are going to Vegas for like 6 years, my annual Napa trip with my mom, and my Miami trip. Laying in the sun in all of these places was one of my favorite things as I am definitely a sun and tanning person. I also sat in my backyard a lot taking in the sun when it was out in SSF and taking in the beautiful landscaping that was created over 10 years ago. Another huge accomplishment was joining and going to the gym 5-6 times a week the whole time I was off. I started at our work gym and realized if I am not going to work I don’t want to be driving into work to go to the gym, so instead I drove to Millbrae for 24 hour fitness. Prior to moving to SSF in 2014 I went to gym for years and it was part of my life. When I moved to SSF I stopped as I didn’t want to bring all of my stuff to the gym to get ready in the morning. A friend that I hadn’t talked to for a long time said what do you mean you aren’t going to the gym they were shocked. It reminded how something so important to me had been lost. This time off allowed me to get it back and get back to the gym. It wasn’t always easy, but it always felt good after. Getting stronger physically and mentally is a great combination and I got to do that everyday. I thank my doctor for signing off on my leave, my people leader for covering some critical items for me, and every coworker that covered items for me. You all allowed me to take this time off and really focus on me, can’t thank you enough. Thank you to every friend who supported me from a text saying how are you, to phone calls or get togethers, to trips, to concerts, to music in the parks. Your time meant so much to me. To my mom who is always there to listen and support me and even stuck up for me a few times, mom your support means the world to me. To my brother who lends a listening ear and sent me a really important message about boundaries, thank you. To my therapist for her support over the past 2 years, and especially for the last 8 months, meeting with me 1-2 times a week. To myself for noticing I wasn’t ok, for saying I wasn’t ok and for asking my doctor for time off. I can’t change the main reason, but I can take care of myself, love myself and show love and kindness to every person that’s important to me. Here’s to my first day back tomorrow and to meeting with my clients this week, I’m back.

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07/11/2025

Reflections Day 1874: In life we have to advocate for ourselves. We know ourselves best. When I got home from my trip yesterday I started to get a sore throat and I was hoping it would go away when I woke up today, but unfortunately it didn't, in fact it had turned to my usual of swollen tonsils. When this happens I need to get liquid steroid that day or it will get worse. When I got up I called my primary doctor and waited to speak to someone and was bumped to voicemail and left a message. I called again and was bumped to voicemail. I needed to speak to someone as I needed to get the liquid steroid. I tried to log into our myChart and the system had changed to a new one on 7/1. I tried to set up an account and it wouldn't work. I was getting frustrated, didn't feel good and set up an appointment at urgent care. My old primary doctor and nurse practitioner always had someone to answer the phone or would get back to you in a few hours. They provided the liquid steroid in their office and even did breathing treatments when I needed them. It is extremely disappointing to not be able to find this level of care, however I do know that in urgent care they will help me the same day. I got to urgent care, was taken right in and shared what was going on. I was negative for strep throat which I knew. I then shared with the doctor and she checked me out and was discouraging me from taking liquid steroid. While I appreciated her sharing some side effects and concerns she had, I didn't feel like she was listening to me. I have been dealing with swollen tonsils my whole adult life. When I get them if I don't get this steroid they can get worse. This can happen once a year to me or more times in a year. The liquid steroid always works and I've had no side effects. I get she needed to do her job, but it was also important for her to listen to me. I shared that I avoid taking steroid medicaiton as much as I can in fact the last time I was presribed prednisone pills I didn't take them. The last time this was bad I did take them. I wanted to let this doctor know that I know my body, I know how my tonsils get and needed the medication to stop the swelling. She agreed to give me the medication. Some of us maybe would have felt uncomfortable to question the doctor. Please, please remind yourself you know your body, you know how you react to certain medications and say what you need. I am so grateful she gave me the meds, within 3-4 hours my tonsils were not swollen anymore. I am also taking Tylenol and Ibuprofen per her recommendation. I am resting, drinking fluids and taking care of myself, feeling like I'm on the mend. Speaking up can be hard, but speaking up for yourself so important.

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06/30/2025

Reflections Day 1873: In my life I have taken 3 leaves of absence from work. The first was for my ACL/MCL surgery, the second was maternity leave when my daughter was born and the third was extended bereavement leave when my dad passed away. My surgery and maternity leave were standard leaves of absence. The extended bereavement leave was a bit harder to come to. I went back to work to both of my jobs a week after my dad passed away. Most people couldn’t believe it and I thought I was fine. I wasn’t really fine, but I was trying to do my best to get back to life. A few weeks back to work I started to notice I wasn’t feeling right, and I was missing little things I wouldn’t normally miss. I started to think maybe I need some additional time off. It was a really hard decision because I had to admit I wasn’t ok. I am a very strong person, a proud person and to admit I needed help and ask for it wasn’t easy. I remember calling the person that I would discuss my leave with, and I told them why I wanted to take the leave and how my doctor supported it and that it would be about 3 weeks from that date. The man said that most people are usually already on their leave and asked why I was waiting and planning it? I said I had someone on medical leave and someone else on sabbatical. The man said to me you are important too. It reminded me that while it’s my nature to take care of others, I also needed to take care of me. I didn’t change my leave date, I kept it the same, but it was a big lesson about taking care of me. You may be wondering why I am talking about leaves of absence? Well, I’m at another turning point where I was noticing that things were not ok. For some time, I’ve shared that I’ve been going through something really difficult and about a month ago I realized it may be time for me to take another leave. This one is a bit different than the others as it’s not a surgery, not a pregnancy and not a death, but it is a huge loss that I’m grieving. I am not sure how it will turn out and that is very scary, however I know I need to take the time for me away from both jobs to have the space to heal. This too was a big decision and thank goodness I had so much support from my family, friends, my manager, my clients, my direct reports and all the people in my corner. I start my leave tomorrow and I will take each day for me. I have a few trips planned, I will continue to work with my therapist, I have a few books to read and most importantly I can just be me without the mask up that I’ve had to hold up for 6 months. On Friday I was meeting with a few colleagues and shared about my leave and what has led to it. Sharing this story is not an easy one and yet sharing it helped one of the people I spoke with share their story. They had never told anyone the full story and they trusted me to tell me. I felt honored and I felt proud that my sharing led to their sharing. Many times, we are really concerned with what people will think, how they will react, what they will say, me included. Remind yourself in those moments that telling our story is one of the most powerful things we can do. I am grateful for this time I will have on my leave as it’s a gift for me to heal.

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05/14/2025

Reflections Day 1872: Thank you so much to SSF Police for the Public Safety Community Meeting they held last night to support our community after the April 28th shooting on Arroyo Drive. They did a great job walking us through minute by minute what was going on and for me it provided a beginning to closure. Thank you to my neighbor for letting me know the meeting was happening. On my block we had thought we heard about 30-40 shots, turns out the shooter shot over 60 shots and the police 20-30 shots. Can you imagine being 2 doors away from over 80 gun shots, wow. Can you imagine what the neighbors felt that were getting shot at? SSF Police offered mental health support to the community and held us last night as they walked through everything and showed the video shortage. I felt seen and heard and that us the community was valued. I felt supported and protected by the SSF Police that put their lives on the line to protect us. Here is the recording of the meeting and the video they showed with no sound of the 911 calls and body cam footage. We are not alone and our neighborhood and this community has come together and will continue to support each other.

City of South San Francisco Public Safety Community Meeting 5/13/2025