Timothy Spitzhoff, MA, LCMHC, Lcas-a

08/17/2022

It was an absolute please to speak with my fellow panelists and ZBT alumni on wellness in our respective fields.

04/01/2022

Introducing our NEW coaching group, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work!! This group is facilitated by Kimberly Welliver, MA, LCMHC and myself. The group is 9-weeks, starting May 4th, 2022, every Wednesday, at 7 PM EST, Virtually.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work program at Southlake Counseling aims to help couples in building strong relationships over the course of nine modules. The leaders of this program achieve this by presenting Dr. John Gottman’s research through teaching, role-playing exercises, and assisting couples in learning how to:
Improve friendship, fondness, and admiration
Enhance romance and intimacy
Improve conflict resolution
Creating shared meaning
Maintain gains

Why this program?
Dr. John Gottman analyzed over 30,000 couples’ habits and interactions over the course of his research. Through the course of his research, he developed antidotes to decrease the top four behaviors that lead to divorce. Dr. John Gottman has broken down the steps into digestible lessons to first identify these detrimental behaviors as well as what couples can do to overcome conflict and strengthen their relationship.
Who is this program for?
- Married couples
- Couples contemplating marriage
- Engaged couples
- Couples of all gender and orientation
- Couples of all faith and background
- Couples who are doing well and want to improve
- Couples contemplating couples/marriage therapy

To sign-up TODAY, call 704-896-7776 or visit our website at www.southlakecounseling.com!

I am a licensed mental health counselor who works with individuals who suffer from a variety of mental health disorders that hinder them from living happy and healthy lives. I also conduct couples and marriage therapy utilizing the Gottman Method.

03/23/2022

Now accepting new clients at Southlake Counseling. Call today at 704-896-7776

03/21/2022

Our love story is something we write to have a happy ending. However, sometimes our love story veers away to a page of conflict and confrontation. Dr. John Gottman, author of the book the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, identified criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling as the top four predictors for divorce.

🐴Criticism is a verbal attack on someone's character, personality, actions, or appearance. It can sound like "You are always late" or "You are so selfish and you only think about yourself."

🐴Defensiveness is normally the response to criticism. It occurs when a partner is denying responsibility when their actions.
Example: Partner One: You didn't buy any dog food on the way home. Partner Two: You know I had a busy day at work and I will get to it later.

🐴Contempt is taking a moral superiority over the other partner. Physically it can look like eye rolls or scoffing. Verbally it can look like talking down to or even sounding disgusted with their partner.

🐴Stonewalling occurs when a person physically retracts from the conversation and becomes unresponsive to the partner. The person may avoid eye contact and even turn away from their partner. During this time, the individual may be in a state of being flooded. When a person is flooded, they are entering into a fight or flight response and their cognitive abilities decrease.

If the four horsemen are running rampant in your love story, the good news is there is hope for there is an antidote for each of them. These antidotes will be covered in future segments.