Norm Therapy

01/10/2026

WARNING: This post has discussions of Domestic Violence and su***de. Discretion is advised.

Brutality Behind the Badge: When Those Who Serve Can’t Protect

Some may know the name of David Brame, a man who served as a police chief in the early 2000s. You may expect him to be known for the service he provided under his role. For the lives he protected and saved.

This is not the case, though. Brame is known for killing his wife Crystal, then killing himself shortly after.

Brame had prior abuse allegations against him, most notably a r**e accusation from 13 years prior. He did not face legal repercussions. His position of authority was still held.

The consequences? A brutal murder-su***de witnessed by his children (Writer, 2014).

A similar incident followed six years later. Joseph Longo Jr, a police investigator, stabbed his wife Kristin to death. He then pointed the knife at himself.

These horrific situations are not isolated. Up to 40% of law enforcement families experience Domestic Violence (French & Fletcher, 2022). The exact percentage is unknown, however, due to the secretive nature of officer relationships. The expectation to brush off misdeeds, to follow a code.

This is not actual protection. It does not address the reasons behind the brutality that officers enact in both public and private.

Why were both Brame and Longo Jr. violent toward their wives and themselves?

Every day, police officers step into the chaos the rest of us try to avoid. This constant, cumulative exposure to trauma is the silent crisis of law enforcement, inflicting severe and often hidden wounds on the men and women sworn to protect and serve.

Officers face significantly higher rates of PTSD, depression, and anxiety compared to the general population (Walden University, 2024). A single officer may be exposed to hundreds of traumatic events over the course of their career. This is a slow, steady erosion of their mental well-being. A cumulative burden that wears down their resilience.

The mental trauma combined with work overload, lack of institutional support, and a culture that breeds silence, unsurprisingly, leads to terrifying outcomes.

The mental health crisis among law enforcement is an emergency that demands immediate and systemic change. We must shift the narrative from seeing mental health support as a weakness to viewing it as essential.

On this National Law Enforcement Appreciation Day we need to step up for those who run toward the danger. This is not just a moral obligation, it is critical for public safety. When an officer’s mental health suffers, their judgment, performance, and ability to engage empathetically with the community are all compromised.

If you or someone you know is having thoughts of su***de, call or text 988 immediately to reach the 988 Su***de & Crisis Lifeline in the United States and Canada. Help is available 24/7.

Be the first responder for safety. Provide support at AbuseRefuge.org.

01/01/2026

Happy 2026! A new year means 365 new opportunities to create value and drive change. ⭐

We are ready to seize them with you!

Wishing everyone a year filled with powerful moments and breakthroughs. 🎉

01/01/2026

Tonight, on the eve of the New Year, we extend our sincere wishes for safety and peace. 🎆🕊

We take this moment to reflect on the significant impact made possible by your support and the spirit of kindness that sustained our efforts.

Here’s to conquering new challenges and celebrating countless victories in the coming year. 🍾🎉

12/28/2025

WARNING: This post has discussions of murder and gun violence. Discretion advised.

The Night Laughter Turned to Screams

The warmth of Christmas Eve should have wrapped Elle Edwards in comfort.

The clinking glasses, the chatter of friends, the scent of festive cheer, it all felt familiar, even normal, but most of all, safe. At 26, she had her whole life ahead of her, laughing freely, dreaming boldly. A normal and carefree night at a pub with friends.

At 11:50 pm, that normalcy was shattered. A gunshot tore through the air in the quiet English town of Wallasey Village, in Merseyside. One bullet. One moment. One life stolen.

Elle’s body fell amidst the celebration, blood pooling on the wood floor, echoes of Christmas music mixing with screams. Connor Chapman, then 23 years old, who was later convicted of her murder, had taken her future in a single, horrifying act.

Imagine, one minute, holding a glass of sparkling wine, a toast on the tip of your tongue, and the next, feeling the burning sting of metal tearing through flesh. The horror froze Elle’s friends' faces mid-laughter, their expressions contorting in shock as reality collided with a nightmare they couldn’t wake up from.

But long after the sirens faded and the pub was emptied, a different kind of silence settled over the place, a hollow, lingering quiet that felt heavier than the gunfire that caused it. It was the silence of lives abruptly rerouted, of futures rewritten without consent. In that darkness, the ghost of that night still clings to the walls: a reminder that violence doesn’t simply take a life, it sends aftershocks rippling through every soul left behind. What was once a place of laughter became a monument to absence, a chilling testament to how swiftly joy can be swallowed by terror.

Violence does not wait for holidays. It does not pause for joy. It barges in, uninvited, leaving devastation in its wake. According to the Office for National Statistics (2023), nearly 2 million adults in the UK experienced violent crime in 2022. Too often, the stories of those lost, like Elle, are reduced to numbers. Elle and Connor were complete strangers, and police discovered that gang disputes led to the shooting. Connor callously saw Elle as simply collateral damage.

On nights meant for celebration, victims like Elle and those she loved face the unimaginable: a life cut short, memories tarnished, families forever altered. A cruel reminder that trauma and violence can lurk in places that feel the safest.

Anyone in the world can get caught in the crossfire of violence at any time of year.

This holiday season, as we decorate and sing carols, let us not forget the Victims silenced in the shadows. Let us honor them by standing up against the brutality that claims the innocent.

Learn, act, and protect. Understand the signs, support Victims, and help prevent tragedies like Elle’s from happening again.

Fund Safety. Make a donation at AbuseRefuge.org.

12/25/2025

Wishing you a night filled with peace, warmth, and joy. May you find stillness and comfort as the holiday begins.

We send our very best wishes to you and yours. 🎄✨❄️

12/23/2025

WARNING: This post has discussions of Domestic Violence. Discretion advised.

Tinsel, Trauma, and the Truth: The Rising Shadow of Holiday Violence

Christmas is painted as a season of joy, a time when families gather under warm lights, exchanging gifts and laughter, forming core memories.

But beneath the glowing surface of holiday happiness lies a truth rarely discussed: for many, Christmas is a time of fear, tension, and hidden suffering.

Behind closed doors, cheer is replaced by dread. Houses displaying sparkling lights outside may be filled with intimidation, manipulation, and violence inside. While the world celebrates, some family members walk on eggshells, trying to avoid the next outburst.

Domestic Abuse is a global issue, and cases rise disturbingly during the Christmas period. Reports show a 15% increase in incidents (French, 2024), with countless more unreported. Financial pressures, unrealistic expectations, and increased alcohol consumption often escalate existing tensions, but none of these factors excuses violence.

It must be clear: Christmas does not cause abuse. Abusers do. The holiday season simply exposes what already exists behind the façade of a “happy family.”

A powerful example is the story of Samantha Billingham, who openly shares the hidden terror she lived through.

She recounts her first Christmas with her abuser: “On Christmas Day, instead of laughing around the table with my family, I sat in an armchair alone, staring into space as he visited his parents” (Billingham, 2022).

Her second Christmas was darker. Samantha describes how her then-boyfriend destroyed the Christmas tree and ripped down the ceiling decorations, shredding symbols of joy in anger before punching her in the head.

Almost a year later, he slapped her so hard he split her lip while she was holding their baby. That moment forced a truth upon her: it wasn't going to get better. It was going to get worse.

That was the day she decided to leave. Her daughter was the reason for taking this terrifying next step.

After escaping, Samantha learned what peace actually felt like during the holidays. Today, she celebrates Christmas with her daughter, free from fear. “Being a mother and watching the daughter who saved your life open her presents in a safe environment is such a magical feeling.”

Her story shows a hard but powerful truth: even in the darkest situations, there is a way out. There is hope. And there can be life after abuse, one where Christmas truly becomes a season of peace again, not pain.

You can help others turn silence into strength, just as Samantha did. Support our mission at AbuseRefuge.or.

12/14/2025

We wish you a meaningful Hanukkah filled with light, joy, and the spirit of resilience. 🎁

As the menorah candles burn bright, may the miracle of light inspire hope and action in our community. 🕯️✡️

12/01/2025

The Worst I've Ever Seen: A Cop's Confession

WARNING: This post has discussions of Child Abuse. Discretion advised.

A quiet Southern town where days move slow and nights fall still.

Neighbors wave from their porches. Parents trade stories. Everyone thinks they know everyone.

Or at least, everyone thinks they do.

In towns like this, evil doesn’t usually come with warning signs. It becomes the house you drive past on your way to work or the family you greet at the grocery store.

April 27, 2015, began like any other day. Oklahoma police officer Jody Thompson, shaped by this small town and its sense of duty, will forever remember the day the call came in. A young boy had run to a neighbor’s house, breathless, shaking, claiming his parents were trying to kill him.

Even for hardened officers, the words cut through the air like ice. But for Jody, trained in Child Abuse, it stirred something deeper. He rushed to the address. What he found inside would stay with him forever.

The house was quiet. When Jody stepped inside, the smell hit first: rot, mildew, neglect. The kind of smell that tells you something was terribly wrong.

Then he saw the boy, John, who was fragile and barely holding on.

His hands were tied. His body was a roadmap of pain, cuts, bruises, and scars everywhere. A grotesque knot swelled on his head, the size of a tennis ball.

This wasn’t just a crime scene. It was a house of torment. Locks on the outside of the child’s bedroom door. Filth covering the floors. Little to no food.

Not a home, a prison.

John was taken immediately into protective custody. At the hospital, doctors admitted him straight to the ICU. He was malnourished, dehydrated, and traumatized beyond imagination.

And through it all, Officer Thompson stayed by his side. Because something about this child, this case, felt different.

John had been abused in ways that chilled even the most seasoned investigators. The boy had been submerged repeatedly in barrels of water. Sometimes headfirst, sometimes with lids closed over him, sometimes with bags of ice thrown in. Torture disguised as punishment. Jody later said it was one of the worst things he had ever seen done to a child who was still alive.

The boy’s parents were arrested and charged with two counts of Child Abuse by injury and neglect. Each received a 35-year sentence.

But justice, even when served, cannot erase trauma. And Jody knew that sending John to a foster home wasn’t enough.

When John was released from the hospital, Jody and his wife, already parents of two sons, with a baby on the way, opened their home to him. In an instant, their family of four became five. Then six. Then seven.

Because soon after, the Thompsons learned that John’s biological mother had given birth while in jail. And Jody didn’t hesitate. They adopted the baby, too.

Check out the full story below:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UD81Jd-zw4Y

Spread love by supporting a Victim today, like John at AbuseRefuge.org.

11/29/2025

The Father Who Tried to Kill Her

WARNING: This post has discussions of Child Abuse and domestic violence. Discretion advised.

Melissa Gallagher learned early that home could be the most dangerous place to exist. Her mother, an isolated immigrant with no support system, endured the first blows. Then the violence turned to Melissa. Broken glass, slammed doors, and acted-out threats became the soundtrack of her childhood. When you grow up without safe comparisons, abuse can feel like normal life.

It wasn’t until she went to summer camp that she realized something was wrong. She couldn’t participate in activities because her ribs and arms still ached from recent beatings. A counselor noticed. Mandatory reporters are trained to speak up, and that report opened the door to CPS, school officials, and church leaders to start asking questions.

But the fallout at home was immediate. Her father threatened her siblings if she said another word. Her mother pulled her out of counseling after one session. The family blamed her for CPS involvement, a common tactic in abusive households. As depression grew, Melissa began believing that disappearing might solve everyone’s problems.

Despite everything, Melissa pursued nursing school at eighteen. When her father became severely ill, she stepped into the caretaker role for him. But on March 2nd, 2021, he erupted again, so violently that her mother barely held him back as he tried to attack her. That night marked the beginning of her homelessness.

Surviving without a home tested her in new ways. She learned firsthand what many social workers already know: escaping abuse is not a single event but a long, unstable process with many setbacks. Her father eventually offered a hollow apology, and she experienced six months of fragile peace before the cycle snapped again.

Her partner eventually signed a lease and insisted she finally have a real place to sleep. A safe room with a door that only opened when she allowed it. As time progressed, Melissa finished her nursing degree,

In the end, Melissa’s survival is not a miracle. It’s a warning. There are countless children still living in houses where screams are muffled by walls and silence is enforced by fear. They are bruised into obedience, blamed into quiet, and threatened into believing escape is impossible. Melissa crawled out of that darkness, but many never do.

If her story teaches anything, it is this: abuse doesn’t end on its own, and Victims can’t save themselves while trapped inside the violence. They need witnesses. They need intervention. They need people who refuse to look away. The question now is painfully simple: after hearing her story, will you choose to be one of them?

To watch the full story, click below:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euomWzaOReA&list=PLXKR6akvUrerTYjOFvU193ZhDTIoqS4yW&index=6

‌Guard the vulnerable. Contribute to AbuseRefuge.org today.

11/28/2025

❄️ Hot Off the Press! ❄️

Our ARO & Norm Therapy® Winter 2025 Quarterly Newsletter is here!

Dive into the latest updates and insights. We'd love for you to spread the word and share with anyone who could find our work helpful!

Thank you to Amanda Hildreth for her incredible effort in managing all aspects of our newsletter and to Grace Gong for the Winter-themed design.

Please note: There are hyperlinks throughout the newsletter that you can click on to learn more!
✨ Be sure to click “accessibility mode” to access all the hyperlinks.

Wishing you a happy holiday season. ☃️🎄 ❄️

❄️ Hot Off the Press! ❄️ Our ARO & Norm Therapy® Winter 2025 Quarterly Newsletter is here! Dive into the latest updates and insights. We'd love for you to spread the word and share with anyone who could find our work helpful! Thank you to Amanda Hildreth for her incredible effort in managin...

11/27/2025

Today, we take a moment to pause and appreciate the people and progress that truly matter. We're deeply thankful for our followers, supporters, donors, and community. 🫶

Wishing you and your family a memorable day of thanks. 🙌🥧🍏

11/26/2025

Hate Disguised as Love

WARNING: This post has discussions of Emotional Abuse and R**e. Discretion is advised.

From the moment he met her, a single mother trying to juggle work and life, he was an absolute force, sweeping her off her feet with relentless, overwhelming attention. She felt seen, cherished, and finally, supported.

He didn't just ask about her struggles; he offered a solution. "Move in with me and work for my family’s business," he insisted.

The moment she settled, the light began to dim. The job he promised never materialized. She found herself stuck at home, jobless and financially reliant on him.

Then came the subtle, insidious isolation. Every close connection she had was met with his disapproval, creating a reason why they shouldn’t come around. Soon, her world shrank to just him.

When she challenged the broken promises, the gaslighting began. She was depressed, anxious, and scared.

One night, she fell asleep, exhausted from motherhood and the constant psychological warfare. When she awoke, she realized her sexual boundaries had been violated. He insisted that this was just part of their relationship that she would have to get used to.

The incidents of anger and aggression escalated quickly. The mask of the charming provider fully slipped away, replaced by volatile temper and emotional outbursts. The constant tension became an unbearable weight.

The relationship eventually ended, but the terror didn't. When his behavior finally crossed a line and she called the police, he was arrested. But when he was released, he turned the manipulation up to an eleven, begging her to forgive him, promising change, until he convinced her to drop the charges—a promise he never kept.

His final, cruel blow was delivered in court. He filed for emergency custody, using the medical records he had leveraged for years. He called her mentally unstable and a flight risk, painting her as an unfit mother.

Luckily, the judge saw through him, and she became free from his grasp.

This is the story of Michelle Brinn, who endured Psychological and Emotional Abuse at the hands of her partner. While he was also Physically Abusive, his primary weapon was psychological torture.

Almost half of American women experience psychological violence at the hands of an intimate partner.

Words are powerful. They can build or break a person. They can teach love or instill fear.

If you recognize yourself here, know this: you can still change the ending.
You can learn new ways to speak, to heal, to show love.
You can ask for help. You can stop the cycle before it reaches another generation.

For the full story, click here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGwBAS6kMNk

Empower Victims and get the help you need at AbuseRefuge.org