Frank Anderson, MD

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10/30/2025

The “big T / little t” language was originally meant to help therapists categorize trauma. But in practice, it often does the opposite of what it intended - it minimizes people’s pain.

Because trauma isn’t about the event. It’s about the impact.

Three people can live through the same experience, and for one it’s life-changing, while another walks away seemingly fine.

That doesn’t mean one person is “too sensitive” or “overreacting.” It means their nervous system, their story, and their support were different.

The “big T / little t” language gave us a helpful starting point - it reminded us that trauma comes in many forms. But healing deepens when we move beyond labels and start understanding how differently each mind and body hold pain.

We often assume “processing trauma” looks the same for everyone: sit in therapy, talk it through, feel the emotions. But...
10/28/2025

We often assume “processing trauma” looks the same for everyone: sit in therapy, talk it through, feel the emotions. But for many people, simply remembering can reopen the wound.

When the body doesn’t yet feel safe, the brain can’t tell the difference between past and present. The amygdala fires, stress hormones surge, and you’re no longer remembering - you’re reliving.

That’s why trauma processing has to be personalized.
Some people need to start with somatic work to bring the body out of survival mode.

Others need modalities like EMDR, parts-oriented therapy, or neurofeedback to help the brain safely rewire the memory.

Healing isn’t about forcing yourself to “face it.” It’s about creating the safety and support that allow your system to integrate it.

Because when your body no longer treats the memory as a threat - that’s when remembering becomes rewiring and healing begins.

True healing asks more of us than insight alone.You can’t think your way out of what your body has been carrying.That’s ...
10/27/2025

True healing asks more of us than insight alone.
You can’t think your way out of what your body has been carrying.

That’s why the most effective approach to trauma healing is integrative - one that brings together the mind, body, and nervous system.

Talk therapy can help you make sense of what happened. But release happens through the body.
And healing doesn’t stop there.

Your biology also needs support - nourishing food, quality sleep, and rhythms that signal calm instead of crisis. It’s about helping your mind, body, and nervous system work together again.

When they’re in sync, your body no longer has to protect you from your own past. That’s when real healing begins.

10/24/2025

Healing doesn’t have to take a lifetime. The key isn’t just understanding your past, it’s learning how to live differently in the present.

Therapy helps us uncover what happened. Coaching helps us move forward. And neuroscience helps us understand why change is possible.

That’s why my approach brings all three together - so people don’t just gain insight, but integration.

Because healing isn’t only about where you’ve been. It’s about how you live now.

I’ve seen this dynamic play out so many times in couples, in families, even in therapy rooms. One person shuts down and ...
10/22/2025

I’ve seen this dynamic play out so many times in couples, in families, even in therapy rooms. One person shuts down and the other feels pushed away.

What often gets missed is that silence isn’t always a wall; sometimes it’s a wound that learned to protect itself.

When I talk about the body’s survival strategies, it’s because they’re the unseen bridge between trauma and our relationships.

Your nervous system isn’t trying to sabotage connection - it’s trying to keep you safe. But if we don’t recognize that, we end up blaming the very responses that once helped us survive.

Healing begins when we notice those patterns with compassion instead of judgment. When we can say, “This isn’t defiance- it’s a matter of survival,” something shifts. Safety starts to return, and with it, the ability to stay present, to speak, to repair.

That’s the work: not fighting our defenses, but understanding them so they can finally stand down.

We’ve been taught to “regulate our nervous system” as if calm is the goal. But calm is a byproduct of safety, not a subs...
10/22/2025

We’ve been taught to “regulate our nervous system” as if calm is the goal. But calm is a byproduct of safety, not a substitute for it.

Meditation, breathwork, affirmations, and cold plunges can absolutely help shift your state - but if you never address what’s beneath the anxiety, you’re soothing the surface while the root keeps firing.

Real regulation comes from integration: where you’re not just managing symptoms, but creating safety.

10/17/2025

Most people don’t realize how much of their behavior is actually a trauma adaptation.

And by “trauma,” I don’t just mean abuse or catastrophe. It can be any overwhelming experience your mind and body didn’t know how to handle at the time.

That kind of overwhelm leaves an imprint—one that can surface years later as overworking, people-pleasing, avoiding conflict, drinking, overeating, or needing control.

Those patterns aren’t random. They formed for a reason—your system’s way of keeping you safe when safety wasn’t guaranteed.

If we never recognize them for what they are, we just keep calling them “bad habits” or “personality flaws”—and miss the chance to understand what’s actually driving them.

Awareness doesn’t excuse the behavior, but it opens the door to change.

Most people see the inner critic as the problem. But from a trauma and neuroscience perspective, it’s more accurate to s...
10/16/2025

Most people see the inner critic as the problem. But from a trauma and neuroscience perspective, it’s more accurate to see it as a learned safety response.

When we experience judgment, rejection, or instability early on, our brain learns that self-criticism equals protection.

We internalize that voice to stay prepared, stay acceptable, stay safe.

The issue isn’t that you have an inner critic—it’s that your brain still believes you need it.

The good news is, the brain can change.
When you bring awareness and compassion to that voice, you teach your nervous system a new kind of safety— one that doesn’t rely on shame or self-attack to keep you secure.

The inner critic isn’t something you erase.
It’s something you retrain.

And every time you meet it with awareness instead of fear, your brain learns a new way to keep you safe.

Your imagination can help heal your trauma.Not by escaping reality—but by rewiring it.Most people think healing only hap...
10/15/2025

Your imagination can help heal your trauma.
Not by escaping reality—but by rewiring it.

Most people think healing only happens through what’s real—what we do, say, or experience in the outside world.

But neuroscience shows something extraordinary: your brain responds to vividly imagined experiences in many of the same ways it does to real ones.

That means you can start forming new neural pathways of safety and connection even before those experiences happen in real life.

✨ Imagining being held by a caring figure can calm the amygdala and activate oxytocin pathways.
✨ Visualizing yourself setting a boundary or speaking up can strengthen prefrontal circuits involved in self-agency.

While imagination doesn’t fully replicate lived experience, research shows it can activate enough of the same neural pathways to begin changing how the brain encodes safety and connection.

This is what makes imagination one of the most powerful ways to create corrective experiences in trauma healing—moments where your brain and body get to feel, even symbolically, what should have happened but didn’t.

Because trauma locks the brain into rigid patterns—hypervigilance, shutdown, shame loops. Imagination reintroduces flexibility.

Even something as simple as imagining yourself moving, running, or being protected can begin to complete the defensive cycle your body never got to finish.

In that imagined movement, your brain begins to relearn: I can act. I can choose. I’m not frozen anymore. And as those images become felt in the body—not just seen in the mind—they begin to anchor a new sense of safety.

Over time, these imagined experiences activate neuroplasticity—carving new neural pathways that anchor safety, power, and connection where fear once lived.

So when you close your eyes and picture a new ending, don’t dismiss it as “just imagination.”

That’s your brain—and your body—practicing healing in real time.

10/14/2025

Most couples don’t realize how often they’re re-enacting each other’s history. What feels like a fight about dishes, attention, or tone is often an old wound being re-activated.

That’s why love can feel both magnetic and maddening.

🔹Your partner’s silence might remind you of being ignored.

🔹Their criticism might echo a parent’s disapproval.

And before you know it, your nervous system is reacting to the past— not the moment you’re actually in.

We often think: “If you could just love me the right way, this pain would go away.” But no partner—no matter how patient or kind—can heal what belongs to your inner world.

Healing begins when you notice what’s been activated and turn toward it. Not by blaming yourself or your partner, but by bringing compassion and curiosity to what’s surfacing inside you.

And here’s the paradox—when you take responsibility for your own healing, love actually does become more healing.

Because instead of seeking someone to complete the work for you, you create a relationship that supports it.

Real love isn’t about avoiding activation. It’s about learning to meet what arises—together, but from a place of wholeness within yourself.

Ever wonder why two people can live through the same thing, but only one develops trauma?It’s not about willpower or tou...
10/12/2025

Ever wonder why two people can live through the same thing, but only one develops trauma?

It’s not about willpower or toughness—
it’s about whether your nervous system felt safe enough to process what happened.

When we face overwhelming pain without support,
the brain encodes it as ongoing threat.

When we face it with safety and connection,
the nervous system can reprocess and integrate it.

That’s the essence of integrative trauma healing:
helping the mind, body, and relationships reconnect
so that what once felt unbearable can finally be resolved.

Because healing doesn’t come from erasing the past.
It comes from finally having what you needed back then: safety, support, and connection.

Most of us try to get rid of painful thoughts:“I shouldn’t feel this way.”“Stop overthinking.”“Just move on.”But here’s ...
10/10/2025

Most of us try to get rid of painful thoughts:
“I shouldn’t feel this way.”
“Stop overthinking.”
“Just move on.”

But here’s what neuroscience shows us—
the more you fight a thought, the louder your brain makes it.

That’s because your amygdala interprets that inner struggle as danger, and your prefrontal cortex—the part that helps you regulate—temporarily shuts down.

So instead of calming your mind, you end up reliving the same emotional loop.

Those thoughts that keep looping aren’t random.
Many were formed in moments when your brain was trying to protect you.

That’s why healing isn’t about forcing positive thoughts—it’s about changing how you relate to what arises inside you. When you meet a thought with curiosity instead of judgment, you send a powerful signal to your body: “I’m safe now.”

Your body doesn’t know the difference between an external threat and an internal one. So if you meet your thoughts with fear or frustration, your brain reads that as danger— and your amygdala, the part that scans for threat, amplifies the sense of threat.

But when you pause, breathe, and simply notice what’s happening—without trying to fix or silence it—your nervous system receives a different message.

The amygdala quiets.
The prefrontal cortex—responsible for reasoning, reflection, and choice—comes back online.
And that’s where neuroplasticity begins.

Your brain starts building new connections that link awareness with safety instead of threat. Over time, that repetition teaches your mind:

“I can think and feel difficult things without being in danger.”

That’s what true rewiring looks like—not controlling your thoughts, but creating safety inside your relationship with them.

So the next time an old thought shows up— “you’re not enough,” “something bad will happen,” “they’ll leave”— pause. Notice it. Soften your response.

You don’t have to believe it or banish it. You can simply get curious about it—maybe even listen to what it’s trying to protect.

That’s where healing begins.

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30 Domino Drive
Concord, MA
01742

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