Jenny Howe Consulting

19/12/2025

Joy has been on my mind lately.

I spend so much of my time with clients working through the difficult spectrum of emotions and not nearly enough time on joy. Isn’t that interesting?

Joy is hard. It absolutely requires presence. It demands we notice it before the world takes our mind to the million of distracted places we have infinite access to.

We have to look for it.
And when we find it we have to wrangle it tight and keep it close. Soak it all the way up.

Maybe that’s why.

As I’ve mentioned, my Deak has had a rough Fall. Ironically, seemingly struggling with some compulsions that have come after a stressful illness and surgery. Let me tell you, trying to create exposure and response prevention for a young man who is non verbal is no small feat! But we are doing it and we are all powering through.

A few weeks ago I sat with him in his room amidst a pretty dysregulated emotional episode. The “mommy duck” song came up on his iPad and I began to sing and dance, in a kind of half hearted attempt to distract him. It worked, surprisingly, and we enjoyed our little moment together.

Last week while he was getting ready for bed, I stopped in his bedroom to say goodnight. With the urgency of an ambulance, he rushed to his iPad, scurried through many videos and again, to my surprise, he played the song.

He looked at me absolutely beaming with words of adoration and appreciation only I could hear.

With teary eyes, I sat and sang and danced as we counted ducks aloud. He reached to hug me tightly and in this embrace I heard gratitude and deep wells of love.

I heard him.

And he has seen me - my fatigue, frustration and defeat the last few months.

Joy.
It kind of blindsided me that night. I think often I’ve turned my cheek to it, afraid that maybe it just might break my heart.

Yet the more I call it over, the more frequently it returns on its own.

Quietly, loudly, playfully and soberly.

Unexpected vessels of diaper changes, mundane meals and lonely nights have all contained handfuls of joy for me lately.

And moving through the last of the holiday, may we all be blindsided by the joy in our lives.

Happy Holidays ❤️

20/11/2025

From Sarah:

My name is Sarah Steiner. I was born in Southern California, and that’s where my love for the ocean started. My father and I used to free-dive off Catalina. After high school, I moved to Hawaii to pursue my dream of attending college and living on the island. I went to the University of Hawaii Manoa for my undergrad and got my master’s degree from Chaminade University of Honolulu.

My husband and I share our love for the ocean with my kids, as we are avid surfers and swimmers. I do yoga and strength training weekly because it centers me and helps me stay calm in the life of being a mother. I feel so lucky to be a therapist, as I have grown so much from my own therapy. My mental health is so important to me, and my career aligns with what I feel is vital for every human to have.

19/11/2025

I am so excited to introduce you to Sarah, a new associate therapist we are just thrilled to have join us. Sarah, like Lauren, practices strictly virtually and joins us from Oahu!

Sarah is so motivated, self driven and kind. She is directly supervised by me and very passionate about learning and treating OCD, Anxiety and Trauma.

With Ash, Lauren and I offering waitlist availability we are IN NEED of a wonderful option for clients who need care more quickly. As Sarah fills her schedule, I will be offering sessions for a reduced rate. Once she is full, this rate will shift to our regular rates. Sarah also accepts SelectHealth Insurance and is working towards Medicaid credentialing.

Please reach out to us with any questions! We are so grateful to Sarah and so dang happy to share her with you. Info for booking in bio!

18/11/2025

My partner joked the other day that he’s never heard the word “bandwidth” used so much.
I was like, “look if I had bandwidth I probably wouldn’t be feeling like I needed to say it so much!!”
Bandwidth.
I don’t have a lot of it lately.

I’ve been a little off the grid - Deak’s had a couple of tough months (illness and oral surgery) and is finally just getting back to his little happy self. As I know any parent knows, when our kids are struggling - they take all the emotional reserve.

I’ve had to really work to spend any of that energy on me. I play in pickleball leagues, I work out, I make bread - all of that is fuel for my soul. However, the bandwidth elasticity just kept snapping back at me.

So maybe it’s the season? Or the stage of life? Or just maybe it’s life. Idk. But I’m feeling like I’m learning all over again how to care for myself, my work (which I deeply deeply love) and my people.

That all to say - I’m in this thing with you. I’m working in listening to my body - even when that means it needs rest and a little reality TV.

Monitoring bandwidth is a good thing.

We have an exciting new addition to our team that I’m thrilled to share with you in the next day or so. We are often so full and this woman is the perfect addition at the perfect time.

12/08/2025

Outsourcing our decision making can look like -

*asking a friend before you can send a text
*searching scripture for the “perfect” answer
*waiting for approval from your partner before purchasing the dress you love

There is a fine line between support and dependency. The best way to understand what we want is to make small decisions on our own. This teaches our brain that we can rely on ourselves even if our choices don’t work out the way we’d hoped which leads to self trust.

How do we learn who we are and what we want if something outside of us directs our autonomy?

06/08/2025

Intimacy and safety only exist when honesty is present.

And for some reason we exempt the relationship with our kids sometimes saying things like…

They aren’t old enough.
It will worry them.
They can’t handle it.

Sure, development helps guide us to appropriate explanations and disclosure - but it should not exempt us from telling the truth.

Did you have a bad day?
Tell them.
Are you feeling sad because you’re grieving?
Tell them.
Are you needing support and feeling underwater?
Tell them.

Holding our feelings inside and masking happiness makes everyone feel unsettled.

We can handle the truth.
So can the kids.

05/08/2025

(Reposted from my personal account)

I had a conversation this week about expectations when a child has different abilities. Although it was a professional conversation I teared up because it still hurts.
It always hurts.

Several years ago someone gently and directly told me that Deakon needed his own life (apart from me). Which was pretty ironic considering what I’ve made a living doing.

They were right.

Deak has such a rich and fulfilling life - and it’s his own.

Isn’t that powerful?
Someone as dependent as Deak can still be himself.

These photos are just from this last week of his time at his day program - just one week. I’m flooded with photos daily.

He is so happy - which makes me happy.

And I feel brave every day I put him out into the world. Still.

Also yeah his hair is out of control right now. July has been nuts.

29/07/2025

Enmeshment, by definition, is a lack of boundaries and fused emotional responses inside of a relationship - often the parent/child relationship.

Over-response to another’s emotional state can lead to insecurity in attachment, a lack of self identity and an over identification with the parent/family/partner’s identity.

Empathy is recognizing and offering compassion for another’s emotional experience - not living it with them or fixing it for them.

In a world of shared locations, story uploads, ring cameras and cell phones in elementary school - it’s become incredibly difficult to know the line between safety and healthy separation.

Yet the only way we learn to securely trust in a relationship is through differentiation (leaving and returning).

How can you reflect and create room for trust in your relationships?

01/07/2025

You can find yourself…
and still doubt what you see.
⠀
Therapy can help you not only uncover who you are—but also trust that truth.
⠀
📍 Now accepting new clients in Utah
🧠 Children | Young Adults | Families
📩 Book a session through the link in bio
⠀

28/06/2025

I had an experience this week that really confirmed the intention I’ve had behind the scenes in this practice since inception (7 years!!!!)

I was (am) determined to provide really considerate and specialized care and create a team of professionals who I would trust with my family and sincerely want to hang out with.

This is a business, yes. However, I’ve never grown with any intention other than to provide more people an opportunity to receive the kind of mental health care we all deserve.

You and your loved ones deserve more consideration than a practice where the owner has little to no interaction and consultation.

You and your loved ones deserve individualized treatment plans with therapists that see you as a whole person and not just a diagnosis.

We sincerely care.

We have clinicians who provide cash pay services, some insurance plans and most Medicaid plans.

We will treat you with the compassion you deserve.

Please share with those who matter to you ❤️

27/06/2025

We’re taught to move on fast.
But emotions don’t disappear when ignored—they wait.

Sitting with your feelings isn’t weakness.
It’s how healing begins.

Therapy can help you feel what’s real—safely and gently.

📲 | 📍 Davis County, UT

17/06/2025