Guiding Gates Doula

02/05/2026

It's been about a year since I posted this, and I still tell this amazing story!

I can truly say this is one of the written pieces I'm most proud of! I'm equally proud of my client, who has allowed me to share her empowering birth story with you.

Please stop by and give it a read. My biggest hope is that it inspires you to break free from the undue fear of birth.

"Amber's story became a testament to the power of embracing the unknown, of finding strength in surrender, and of the transformative magic that occurs when we trust in the wisdom of our bodies."

https://www.guidinggatesdoula.com/hampton-virginia-doula-blog/finding-strength-in-surrender

01/30/2026

Sometimes it's a C-section.

And I know it's not about me. But I am there. I also hoped, sacrificed, got angry, cried.

My insecurities bubble up.

Did I do enough?
Do they still value me?
Do they blame me?

I visit them weeks after birth and help them process and heal. They feel only their experience and I get to feel many more. I hold that weight, let it go, and it comes back every now and then. I don't forget them. Years later, I wonder if they're truly healed.

I understand it's not about me, and, rationally, I know why it happened, but I'll always wonder if I could have done more.

01/27/2026

I'm incredibly lucky to have talented friends like Ariel Eishen whose untitled poem speaks to me beyond birth. It's a story of transformation and bravery. Values that we so desperately need in these times.

01/24/2026

Meet Arianne. You're gonna be glad you know her because she'll be your car seat BFF!

"I’m a certified Child Passenger Safety Technician (CPST) and the owner of That Car Seat Mom, a small nonprofit serving families throughout Hampton Roads. My focus is on car seat education, proper installation, and caregiver empowerment—helping families feel confident transporting their children safely from day one.

My approach is non-judgmental, evidence-based, and family-centered. I aim to complement the care you already provide by ensuring families leave the hospital or birth center with confidence in their child’s safety—not just a correctly installed seat."

She offers FREE:

✅One-on-one car seat checks and education sessions

✅Prenatal car seat education (ideal for expectant families)

✅Postpartum support for correct fit and adjustments

https://thatcarseatmom.com/
That Car Seat Mom

01/20/2026

I got a new tattoo! This one is for Artemis.

She's known as the goddess of the hunt, wilderness, and childbirth. Her symbol is a bow and arrow, that shows her dominion over the untamed world, her swift, precise nature, and her role in women's health.

She is also considered the first midwife after helping her mother deliver her twin brother, Apollo, during her mother's difficult nine-day, nine-night labor.

The same bow and arrow used to hunt animals also represented her power to bring sudden death to women during childbirth. This was seen as a way to "release" them from pain or as a, sometimes, vengeful, often protective, act.

Artemis is known as Diana in Roman mythology, who's represented by the moon, so I added that to the bow and arrow. She is invoked at childbirth because children are born after nine lunar revolutions.

01/13/2026

I love it when mamas go into their ritual during labor!

Sometimes, that looks like circling the hips on a labor ball in a specific rhythm, maintaining deep eye contact during contractions, or tapping a finger. They do these things repetitively to keep focused and cope with contractions. And don't you dare interrupt her ritual!

They don't practice this ritual ahead of time, nor do they choose what it'll be. Their body simply calls them to do it.

But my favorite is verbal rituals. I had the honor of attending two births this week, and the moms were deeply immersed in the moment, repeating their special words. One was "open," and the other was "amen." A verbal ritual says so much about the laboring person. ❤️

Did you have a ritual during labor?

01/09/2026

Let's talk money!

Did you know many new parents don't hire a doula because they can't afford one? Yet, they easily create a baby registry of 100-130 items that can total up to $2,000! Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't get the diapers, the gear, or the cute clothes. But instead of getting the latest and the greatest, I suggest you keep a minimal list and use your savings toward a labor/postpartum doula and lactation specialist!

In the end, the things you've bought likely won't add much to your labor or postpartum experience as much as a doula or breastfeeding expert. Look for minimalist registries for ideas and encourage loved ones to show their support by pitching in towards a doula through Be Her Village.

https://simplelivingtoolkit.com/blog/the-minimalist-baby-registry

https://behervillage.com/

This blog is devoted to helping readers create a simpler, experience-over-stuff lifestyle. Minimalism (also intentional living or essentialism) can help us to live our chosen values in a world that makes it all too easy to focus entirely on consuming.Years ago, my house burned down, and I got an imp...

01/06/2026

Personally, I'm not a huge fan of at-home Dopplers. I know many moms use them because it helps them feel reassured. However, that reassurance can sometimes be false. If you're waiting for your baby's heartbeat to change to go to the hospital, you've already waited too long.

The best indicator of something being wrong is your baby's movement. It's highly encouraged that you become aware of how and when they move so that you can get help as soon as something changes. This app makes it easy for you to count the kicks!

Of course, if anything EVER feels off, regardless of the heartbeat and movement, go to the hospital.

The FREE Count the Kicks app helps expectant parents get to know their baby's normal movement patterns in the third trimester of pregnancy.

01/03/2026

Hot take alert!

To me, saying "natural hospital birth" seems a bit of an oxymoron since there are few natural processes taking place at hospitals. Standard hospital care includes bright lights, beeping machines, wires, limited nourishment, frequent interruptions, limited mobility, and various interventions. If you choose or need any of those, that's fine. This isn't about which type of birth is right or wrong. This is about the words you use.

If you end up not using pain medication, that's an 𝑢𝑛𝑚𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑖𝑟𝑡ℎ.

If you don't undergo any (or minimal) standard hospital procedures and your body freely flows through labor with full respect for what your body needs, to include no pain meds, that's called 𝑝ℎ𝑦𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑔𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑙𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑟 or 𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑎𝑙 𝑙𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑟.

Where I think people get confused is thinking a 𝑣𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑏𝑖𝑟𝑡ℎ is a natural birth. You can have ALL the meds and interventions and still have a vaginal birth, but it's not considered a natural birth.

Choose your words wisely, friends.

12/31/2025

There's a time and a place for an OB but the majority of pregnancies and births are uncomplicated and not "trouble."

Undo the thought that labor requires fixing. Challenge what you believe to be typical care. Begin to trust that you were made for this and go see a midwife!

12/26/2025

Make sure your doctor doesn't just say he supports a VBAC...ask what he ACTUALLY does to make it happen. Wishful thinking alone doesn't make for successful VBACs.