10/08/2025
Yes!! This!!
The Human Need for Challenge (and Why Scrolling Won’t Fix Your Horse Problems)
People think humans are reward junkies - carrots, gold stars, likes, dopamine hits.
But here’s the twist: our brains are actually wired for challenge, growth, and connection.
That’s why toddlers fall on their face fifty times trying to walk and still get up for fifty-one. They’re not chasing praise - they’re chasing progress.
But somewhere between learning to walk and learning to “double tap,” we traded struggle for scrolling. Now our phones deliver tiny hits of fake achievement, and our nervous systems are like, “This’ll do, right?”
Fact check: it won’t.
Self-Determination Theory (the less sexy cousin of common sense) says we need three things to feel good about life:
1️⃣ Competence - feeling like we can do the thing.
2️⃣ Autonomy - choosing to do the thing.
3️⃣ Relatedness - doing the thing with others who don’t drive us mad.
This is why real horsemanship works—it’s growth through clarity, skill, and relationship.
When you can actually handle your horse, you feel capable and calm. You stop guessing. You stop grasping. You connect.
When you can’t, you end up wrestling a 600 kg of power and uncertainty that freaks you out.
So yes, challenge is uncomfortable. But that’s where the good stuff lives - confidence, trust, and the kind of partnership you can’t download from the App Store.
This is Collectable Advice Notebook Entry 45 / 365 of my notebook challenge so you can hit SAVE or SHARE to at least spread some good ideas. But please, it is a no-no to copying and pasting ❤