Rachel Henning LPC, CST

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Rachel Henning LPC, CST

Follow me for content and resources on topics of relational and sexual heath!

04/17/2026

“Not tonight” doesn’t mean “I don’t want you” — no matter how hard your brain tries to convince you it’s the truth.

If a sⓔxual decline from your partner feels like rejection of your worth, think: did you grow up hearing that sⓔx is proof of love in a marriage? Or that your spouses body “belongs” to you? These messages are not only false, but don’t allow space for curiosity. Do you know WHY your partner is declining?

A “no” probably isn’t commentary on your desirability or their love for you at all. Declining an advance isn’t the same as rejection. A “no” is probably a signal that your spouse has something else going on. Exhaustion, overstimulation, or carrying a mental load can leave you with little capacity left to give.

Your worth isn’t tied to the amount of sⓔx you have, and you most definitely aren’t entitled to anyone’s body but your own. Connection comes before intimacy, so ask your partner:
“Is there something you’d like me to take off your plate this week?”
”What’s something that’s been weighing on your mind lately? And how can I help carry that?”
”Is there anything you feel like needs more attention in our relationship or home?”

They still love you even when their answer is no.

Rachel Henning, LPC, CST, LMFT
Licensed Professional Counselor
EMDR, Certified S_x Therapist
ICP IASIS MCN Provider

04/12/2026

We put so much pressure on ourselves to have it all together. You might feel the need to collect yourself before you can laugh at the dogs or enjoy moments that matter. But healing isn’t linear; it’s learning how to hold the heavy stuff in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.

You don’t have to be perfectly regulated to still be okay, and you certainly don’t have to be “fixed” to experience joy. Life is found in the unscripted mess and simple moments, the loud laughter, and even the days where you’re just doing your best to breathe.

You’re allowed to be a work in progress and still be deeply, wildly happy in the middle of it. Joy isn’t a reward for finishing your healing journey; it’s a gift you’re allowed to open right now, even when things feel a little shaky.

Take in the beauty and the chaos today, exactly as you are. You’re doing so much better than you think.

Rachel Henning, LPC, CST, LMFT
Licensed Professional Counselor
EMDR, Certified S_x Therapist
ICP IASIS MCN Provider

04/10/2026

You walked down the aisle thinking the struggle with purity culture was finally over, only to find that its rules followed you right into your honeymoon.

It’s exhausting to feel like you’re failing at the one thing that was supposed to be “godly” and “good” once you were married. When one of you is overriding your own comfort just to keep the peace, and the other is pursuing closeness through a lens of entitlement, authentic desire simply can’t breathe.

This isn’t a character flaw in either of you; it’s the result of a system that taught you how to perform roles instead of how to be humans. You weren’t given the tools to navigate different levels of desire or the language for healthy boundaries, so your bodies are doing the only thing they know how to do: protect themselves.

Your marriage isn’t a mistake — you’re just unlearning a script that was never meant for your joy. It’s okay to slow down, name the cycle, and start over; when you’re ready.

Rachel Henning, LPC, CST, LMFT
Licensed Professional Counselor
EMDR, Certified S_x Therapist
ICP IASIS MCN Provider

03/31/2026

The list of games that are good for your brain has arrived!

As I explained in my previous post, there are certain games and hobbies that utilize repetition, pattern recognition, and visual problem solving. These games use the same cognitive energy involved in memory and emotional processing! This phenomenon has been coined, the “Tetris Effect.”

I listed out a handful of games — available on your phone, pc, or console — and hands-on hobbies that mimic the Tetris Effect in similar ways. Let me know which one you try first!

Rachel Henning, LPC, CST, LMFT
Licensed Professional Counselor
EMDR, Certified S_x Therapist
ICP IASIS MCN Provider

Just a reminder: video games and hobbies do NOT replace good therapy, nor are they stand alone treatments. They’re support tools that can be complementary to your existing care.

03/24/2026

Do you ever find yourself pulling away from a simple hug or a hand on your shoulder because your brain has already fast-forwarded to the bedroom?

Your nervous system has learned to view touch as a contract rather than a connection. Those old voices telling you “not to be a tease” or that “if you start it, you have to finish it” have turned a moment of affection into a high-stakes negotiation. It’s exhausting to always be on guard, managing expectations before they’ve even been voiced.

I want you to know that your body is just trying to protect you in the way that it was taught to — that touch must lead to sⓔx. But this anticipatory anxiety and a tendency to avoid closeness can interfere with your relationship and ultimately reduce feelings of safety for both partners.

You are allowed to enjoy affection or a cuddle without it needing to lead anywhere or mean anything more than a silent “I love you.” It’s never too late to unlearn the beliefs that were given to you; when you’re ready 🤍

Rachel Henning, LPC, CST, LMFT
Licensed Professional Counselor
EMDR, Certified S_x Therapist
ICP IASIS MCN Provider

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Mansfield, TX
76063

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