Flannel People Mediation

12/04/2025

Virtual backgrounds in mediation sessions?
Research says they kill trust by 19%.

I learned this the hard way.

Early in my mediation practice, I thought virtual backgrounds made me look more “professional.”

Clean office. Tasteful bookshelf. Perfect lighting.

Then I noticed something.

Couples weren’t opening up the way they did in person.

The conversations felt… hollow.

So I ditched the fake background.

Now they see my actual home office.

The books I’ve actually read.

The window where my chickens occasionally photobomb.

The yellow beanie hanging on the wall.

My messy, real life.

And something shifted.

People started trusting me faster.

Sharing deeper.

Getting to resolution quicker.

Because here’s what I realized:

When you’re helping people through divorce, authenticity isn’t optional.

They need to see you’re real.

That you’re not hiding behind polish and performance.

That what they’re getting is actually you.

Same reason I wear a hoodie, not a suit.

Because when you strip away the corporate theater, people can finally focus on what matters:

Their family.
Their future.
Their peace.

Virtual backgrounds aren’t just fake.

They’re a barrier between you and the people who need your help.

P.S. - What’s your take? Virtual backgrounds professional or performative? Drop a comment.

11/13/2025

$18,000 on therapy. Still fighting about an $800 dishwasher. I see this pattern constantly.

One divorce pattern, one mediation technique, one myth I'm debunking, and one thing that actually works.

(new format, tell me what you think)

The Pattern 👇
Couples spend $15K-$20K on therapy understanding WHY they fight about money. They can articulate their triggers perfectly. His dad lost everything in 2008, so control equals safety. Her mom hid spending, so transparency equals trust.

Then the dishwasher breaks. Costs $800. Three-day fight. Someone sleeps on the couch.

They've got the insight. They just never learned the protocol for "unexpected expense conversation when you're both triggered."

The Technique 👇
Interests vs. Positions. In mediation, we don't negotiate positions ("I want to spend it" vs "I want to save it"). We identify interests underneath (security, autonomy, trust, partnership). Then we solve for those.

The Myth: 👇
"We just need to communicate better." No. You need a protocol for when communication breaks down. Understanding each other is great. Having a structured process for when you're triggered? That's what keeps marriages alive.

What Actually Works:👇

The $800 dishwasher protocol:

(1) Acknowledge the trigger: "This feels stressful."
(2) Name your underlying need: "I need to feel like we're financially secure" / "I need to feel like I have input on spending."
3) Problem-solve the INTERESTS, not the dollar amount: "What if we had a household emergency fund so neither of us feels panicked by surprise expenses?"

That's mediation thinking. Not therapy. Not "communication." Actual tools.

Kate and I teach this in our 3-hour Marriage Rescue Intensive. Because I've watched 80+ couples get divorced over problems they could've solved with better protocols.

If you're on the brink, DM us.

11/12/2025

Hi I’m Ryan. I’m a divorce mediator with 5-star Google reviews from people who want to separate without expensive lawyer battles. My sessions are 100% virtual, flat fee, and 3-hrs is the most common time to completion.

10/30/2025

Everything you need to know about virtual flat fee divorce mediation with Flannel People Mediation

10/29/2025

I listened to a podcast yesterday that challenged business owners to define their mission, then keep a Google doc tallying all the instances where they deliver on that brand mission promise.

I'm going to do that, make the Google doc public, and shared for accountability.

For now, here's the basics about our practice.

10/28/2025

POV: You're wondering if you need a lawyer to get divorced 👇

A common and critical question: Do we both need lawyers for divorce mediation? The short answer is No, you don't need lawyers. It's a personal preference.In ...

10/27/2025

The MOST COMMON word I hear from folks is 👇

Amicable.
Amicable.
Amicable.

They want to keep things "amicable."

That's the word.
That's the mission.
That's the mantra.

If you want to keep your divorce "amicable," click the video below to learn more.

👉Divorce doesn't always have to be a battle. In this video, we break down the crucial question: Should you choose Mediation or hire a Divorce Lawyer?Learn t...

10/16/2025

Going through a divorce or family conflict?

You’re not alone — and you don’t have to go to war to get through it. At Flannel People Mediation, we help people calm the chaos, talk things through, and reach fair agreements that actually work in real life.

Most of our work is divorce and post-decree mediation — helping couples navigate property division, parenting plans, support, and those tough post-divorce adjustments — but we also mediate family, business, and end-of-life conflicts.

We work 100% virtually via Zoom, so you can join from anywhere in the country — no courtrooms, no travel, no stress.

✅ Top-Rated on Google – clients consistently highlight our fairness, calm energy, and compassion.
✅ Free 15-Minute Consultation – talk through your situation before committing to anything.
✅ Neutral, grounded, real – we’re not judges or lawyers here to tell you what to do. We’re here to help you talk, listen, and find your way forward.
✅ Cost-effective and private – mediation is typically a fraction of the cost (and time) of traditional legal battles.

We get it — this is personal, emotional, and maybe overwhelming. That’s why we do things differently: down-to-earth conversations that bring clarity, not conflict.

Reach out today to grab a free consult.

10/04/2025

Myth: "Mediation only works for simple divorces." 🚫

Truth: We successfully mediate complex cases including:

-High-asset divorces
-Business ownership divisions
-Retirement account splits
-Cases with multiple properties
-Complex custody schedules

The question isn't how complicated your divorce is.

The question is: Are both people willing to negotiate in good faith?

If the answer is yes, mediation can work - regardless of complexity.

02/15/2025

02/15/2025

Divorce doesn’t have to be a battle.

But right now, it probably feels like one.

💔 The stress.

The uncertainty.

The gut-punch of realizing this is really happening.

You didn’t plan for this. No one does. And now you’re asking:
❓ How do we split everything fairly?
❓ Will this drag on for years?
❓ What about the kids?

Most couples enter divorce without a plan. They get caught up in the system, spend 💰 thousands on legal fees, and walk away more broken than when they started.

But here’s what they don’t tell you: divorce doesn’t have to ruin you.

At Flannel People Mediation, we guide you through these conversations—step by step—so you can move forward with less stress, more clarity, and a fair resolution that actually works.

💻 Here’s how it works:

📅 Step 1: Book a free consultation. We’ll talk through your situation and see if mediation is the right fit.

🤝 Step 2: We help you work through the tough decisions—finances, parenting, and property—without court battles or endless legal fees.

✍️ Step 3: You reach a full and final agreement that works for both of you, so you can move forward with confidence.

💡 Divorce is hard. Mediation makes it easier.

🔗 Book a free consultation today: https://calendly.com/flannelpeoplemediation/free15consult

💬 Have questions? Send a message. You don’t have to figure this out alone.

07/26/2024

-cost efficient / flexible scheduling / virtual divorce mediation

👕Flannel People Mediation
🌎flannelpeoplemediation.com/divorcemediation
☎️Phone: (763) 316-8323