Ayla Fleming LLC

Ayla Fleming LLC Contact information, map and directions, contact form, opening hours, services, ratings, photos, videos and announcements from Ayla Fleming LLC, Psychotherapist, Philadelphia, PA.

🌱 Family addiction therapist for women
⚡ Break the painful cycle of codependency
✨Weekly therapy or intensives- let's pick what's best for you
💬 DM me to schedule your FREE consult
📍PA, NJ, NY Reach out for a free therapy consultation at https://www.calendly.com/aylathetherapist
Disclaimer: This site is for education and is not intended as medical advice.

12/06/2025

If you love someone with addiction or mental illness, you are all too familiar with the pain of knowing you may lose them. It is unbearable. So much so, that we focus on the small things we can control: how much money we give them, how we lecture them, trying to rationalize with them like they’re a child...

But what we’re really doing is trying to control a potentially uncontrollable disease.

Our time would be much better spent learning about the disease of addiction—and then learning how to keep supporting them (who they are at their core) while simultaneously processing the reality that we could lose them.

If we don't do that, all our efforts will continue to be to control them; not to unconditionally help and love them. And a piece of them knows that.

This doesn't mean we don't have boundaries, but the boundaries are self preserving, consistent, and not punitive. Learning how to do this emotionally takes work and healing on our part.

If you're ready to stop losing yourself in your loved one's addiction, and learn how to help them in a way that's no longer oscillating between resentment, anger, guilt, and denial, contact me today.

🛋️ I’m a therapist who specializes in helping loved ones of people struggling with addiction, mental illness, and dysfunctional family patterns. I offer virtual therapy for clients in📍PA, NJ, and NY.

👉🏼 Book a free 15 min call with me to see if we're a good fit. 🔗 In bio

⚠️ Disclaimer: this post is for information and entertainment only and is not for diagnosis or guidance on your specific situation.

12/05/2025

Sometimes we grip them so tightly because we’re terrified.
We obsess. We can’t sleep. We miss who they used to be.
And they carry the guilt and shame… thinking they’re the reason we’re hurting.

If you’re ready to help without losing yourself, I’m here.
📍 PA • NY • NJ
💻 Video therapy for people loving someone with addiction. From a counselor who gets it.

🗓️ Request a free consult via link in bio

⚠️ This post is for entertainment only. Not medical or diagnostic advice.

12/02/2025

It's time we come to terms that if our loved one has relapsed, they may be in their own world 😵‍💫

If it's feels like you've been screaming into the void for years, you're not alone. This is a very common feeling for loved ones.

🌿 My name is Ayla and I'm a therapist for women and men struggling with a loved one's with addiction and mental illness. My goal is to help you go from walking on eggshells, stressed out, and confused, to grounded, confident, boundaried- and most important, able to give the best possible support to your loved one- whether they get sober or not ❤️ I am a unique therapist because I have both extensive professional specialization and personal experience.

Contact me directly:
📞267-217-3017 call or text
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

Disclaimer: this account is for entertainment only and not diagnosis or advice. Consult your health care provider for medical care.

12/02/2025

It's VERY important that you lean into that urge. Having multiple loved ones struggle with mental illness and addiction was the push I needed to stop thinking other people were the problem and start my own codependency recovery journey. I've now been in the process of recovery for the past 10 years and couldn't be happier about my decision.

11/30/2025

Happy Holidays!
..

Email me to schedule your free 15-min phone consult today. I provide highly specialized and unique therapy for parents who have tried everything else 🍁

My direct line. Contact me today:
📞 267-217-3017 (call/text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

11/29/2025

1. Stop labeling yourself "responsible for" any other adult (including your partner, adult child, or elderly parent). Whether you have been running defense with them and their job, finances, or relationships, it's inappropriate.
🍁 Helping prevent inconvenient or even bad things from happening to your loved ones (even if they struggle with addiction or mental illness) will typically be unsustainable, will cause shame and resentment on both sides, and sends the message that you think they're incapable of doing *anything* for themselves (regardless of what they tell you or ask you to do).

2. You need to start respecting them.
Regardless of what they say or do, you are still responsible for acting like a kind, responsible human. If you think it's okay to treat someone like crap because that's what they're doing to you, you will probably find yourself in chronically toxic relationships.
🍁 Everyone has their bad days. Modeling is often the best chance that the system will change (aka not adding to the chaos).

3. The reason focus on *our own* behavior isn't to change others; it's to break a pattern in the system, and not make things worse. The goal isn't to be "perfect". We're focusing on being "differentiated" (ie, keep our morals and ethics consistent, no matter what anyone else says or does). This consistent behavior is what finally allows others to look at their own lives; becoming "codependent" or "enmeshed" just keeps controlling others the status quo for everyone.
🍁 Whether others change or not, we are responsible to be the best possible version of ourselves (whoever we want that to be). And when we focus on that, it's often the best chance that others in our family system will become their best selves, too.
..

🛋️My name is Ayla and I'm a licensed therapist seeing clients virtually in PA, NY, & NJ. I provide highly specialized, unique therapy for parents of an addicted or mentally ill adult child who have tried everything else 💛

👉🏼Reach out today to schedule a free, 15-min phone consultation:
📞 267-217-3017 (call/text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

11/28/2025

If I were starting over after enabling my adult child for years, here's what I would do first:

🍁 I would refocus my energy to what my boundaries are. Boundaries define what my hard limits are and what I'll do if they are crossed (walk away, say something, etc.). My boundaries would be the same for everyone in my life so they don't end up being punitive or another attempt to control my child's behavior. Odds are, all my mental energy had been going toward justifying throwing out all my needs for a long time.

That changes now.

Every time you start to notice a boundary slip, gently refocus. What is my next step to gently hold my boundary?

Wondering what they need? What do *I* need?

Changing this one thing can transform the relationship.
➖When you hold boundaries, it can help avoid resentment from building.
➖You remain resilient and connected- so you will still be there when they're ready to try a change.
➖They meet a natural consequence, but the endless shame cycle stops.
➖You can view the facts more clearly, because you're not so angry all the time.
➖And their failure to respect your boundaries is no longer defined as their moral failing but instead as a complication of their illness...

I've done it, and you can do it, too 💛
..

👉🏼Your next step: Email me to schedule your free 15-min phone consult today.

My direct line. Contact me today:
📞 267-217-3017 (call/text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

11/27/2025

1️⃣ Treating your addicted LO like an adult- if we treat our LO like a kid, they'll be more likely to act like a kid. If we warmly encourage our LO to make the best possible decisions for themselves, it might encourage them to start thinking about what their best possible decision would actually be- and with the way our society looks at "addicts", this could be the most impactful thing you can do for your loved one. Assuming your LO is capable of eventual recovery (not losing hope) also prevents the shame/guilt relationship cycle from being perpetuated and harming both of your well-being (aka, chronically blaming one another). The last thing you both need is more pain.

2️⃣ It's not going to help your LO if the disease of addiction destroys you too- and, what is the point of making yourself a martyr if they never get better? Is their recovery about your image, or them getting well? Of course, you probably have a boatload of resentments and fear about them seriously harming themselves (or even death). But, is there a way to provide calm support, while also caring for yourself, and pacing yourself? The reality is that people struggling with addiction often relapse many times, and have to experience many uncomfortable "natural consequences", before they decide the pain of addiction outweighs a commitment to recovery. It's hard to watch. But the reality is, it may be part of their process....

3️⃣ Boundaries- flexible boundaries are meant to maintain relationships, not end them. When we hold a boundary, it allows calm and predictability to come into the relationship; We infuse respect and safety into the relationship. With family addiction, these qualities can make a huge difference. This is a way to be part of the solution, rather than add to the problem.

🛋️I'm a family addiction therapist who has been through it too, and come out the other side. Now accepting clients virtually in NY, NJ, and PA.

➡️ Email me directly to schedule your free, 15-min phone consultation today. I provide highly specialized and unique therapy for parents who have tried everything else 🍁

My direct line. Contact me today:
📞 267-217-3017 (call/text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

11/27/2025

If you’re sitting there pretending everything is “fine” while your stomach is tight, waiting for the next call, the next crisis, the next relapse — I see you.
If you’re hiding your fear, overfunctioning for everyone, and walking on eggshells around a grown child you love more than life, I get it deeply. I've been there too.

You can keep trying to hold the family together, fantasize about cutting them off just to finally breathe (and yes… the fantasy feels peaceful 🏖️), or you can try the third option: get support for you and learn how to stay connected without being consumed.

I hope you choose the third option. 💛

I’m a therapist seeing clients virtually in NY, NJ, and PA.

➡️ Email me to schedule your free 15-min phone consult today. I provide highly specialized and unique therapy for parents who have tried everything else 🍁

My direct line. Contact me today:
📞 267-217-3017 (call/text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

11/25/2025

1. You are afraid to lose them

2. You think they can change

3. You feel bad for them and want to make it work

🟰 You are controlling them

There is no way to NOT control someone if you are unwilling to lose them.

Mic drop 🎤
..

These types of behaviors are SO common if you're in a relationship where your loved one struggles with addiction or mental illness. Whether it's your adult child, partner, or parent. I don't say this to shame you, but to help you understand why you keep trying even though you feel so guilty...and still, nothing seems to work, and oftentimes things even seem to make it worse. 🌿 Change is possible when you get off the merry go round 🎠 and start taking care of yourself and grieving the life and relationship you wish your loved one could've had.

💗➡️ If you're ready for change you never thought was dpossibke and an improved relationship with you and your LO, contact me today for a free therapy consultation, about your unique situation, and to see if we're a good fit 🤝

Warmly,
Ayla (a therapist with both personal and professional experience) 💛
..

Disclaimer: this post is not for diagnosis or advice but entertainment purposes only. Contact your health provider for tailored support/diagnosis.

11/24/2025

🛋️ Are you walking on eggshells with your loved one?
😣 Confused and overwhelmed
🔁 Swinging between cutting them off and enabling them
🤯 Doubting yourself one minute
😤 Yelling the next
💔 Feeling like your obsession with them is draining your energy and hurting your other relationships?

🌿 Hi, I’m Ayla.
I’m a therapist for women and men struggling with a loved one’s addiction, mental illness, or other dysfunction.

✨ SpeciaIized therapy with me can help you go from:
• stressed out 😵‍💫
• confused 🤷‍♀️
• emotionally tangled 🧶

to feeling:
• grounded 🌱
• boundaried 🛑
• and thriving again 🌼

💯Whether they get sober or not, you can increase the chances they'll get help by taking care of yourself.

I’m a unique therapist because I have both extensive professional specialization and personal lived experience. 💛

➡️ Ask me for more information during a 15 min free consultation call, and see if we're a good fit to work together.

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📞 Contact me directly:
📱 267-217-3017 (call or text)
📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com

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⚠️ Disclaimer: This account is for entertainment only and not diagnosis or advice. Consult your healthcare provider for clinical guidance.

11/23/2025

If you grew up in a family with addiction or mental illness, you may have learned to make yourself small. 💛 To stay “easy.”

You might be the one who can make friends with anyone—and the second you say no, people ask why you’ve “changed.” 😔

Living this way for years can make it feel impossible to let go of the people-pleaser identity. Your nervous system may be chemically on high alert—even if you’ve lost touch with it...

But, here's the good news: that gut feeling—the one you’ve ignored or doubted—it never went away. You can reconnect with that intuition. 🌱

🛋️ I’m a therapist who helps women do exactly that. Both in relationships with others, and most importantly, yourself. If you’re ready to start listening to yourself again, contact me today to schedule a free, 15 min consultation to see if we're a good fit. ✨

📩 ayla@aylaflemingllc.com
📞 267-217-3017- call or text

Disclaimer: Posts are not therapy nor diagnosis. Please contact your own health provider for treatment.

Address

Philadelphia, PA
19123

Opening Hours

Tuesday 9am - 3pm
Wednesday 9am - 3pm
Thursday 9am - 3pm

Telephone

+12672173017

Website

http://www.calendly.com/aylathetherapist

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