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02/03/2023

Sorry for the repost! No one's head is cut off in this picture.

Our recent trip to southern California concluded with a visit to the National Cemetery in Riverside. My dad was buried there in 2013 along with my older brother, Daniel, who had been there since 1981.

I struggled unexpectedly to explain who Daniel was to my older two. “Unexpectedly” because I knew my dad wasn’t there - only his body. “Unexpectedly” because Daniel’s death happened years before I was born.

Daniel was stillborn at nine months gestation. On the surface, it’s easy to understand. However, if they’re like me, it will be some time before they fully comprehend what that means.

It was devastating to my family. To come home from the hospital empty-handed. For two parents who have to explain to three young children that there is no baby anymore. For my dad, who came in from an assignment overseas for the delivery and burial, to leave the next day.

On one hand, I wouldn’t want my children to understand it at their age. It’s too heavy. On the other hand, I want them to be safe. I want them to know how much they are loved, and how much they were (and still are) wanted.

01/03/2023

Our recent trip to southern California concluded with a visit to the National Cemetery in Riverside. My dad was buried there in 2013 along with my older brother, Daniel, who had been there since 1981.

I struggled unexpectedly to explain who Daniel was to my older two. “Unexpectedly” because I knew my dad wasn’t there - only his body. “Unexpectedly” because Daniel’s death happened years before I was born.

Daniel was stillborn at nine months gestation. On the surface, it’s easy to understand. However, if they’re like me, it will be some time before they fully comprehend what that means.

It was devastating to my family. To come home from the hospital empty handed. For two parents who have to explain to three young children that there is no baby after all. For my dad, who came in from an assignment overseas for the delivery and burial, to leave the next day.

On one hand, I wouldn’t want my children to understand it at their age. It’s too heavy. On the other hand, I want them to be safe. I want them to know how much they are loved, and how much they were (and still are) wanted.

10/02/2023

After I finished a year of doing and 's and , I thought that I had a story worth sharing. Well, so did the folks over at the Beachbody Challenge! My entry to their contest has made it to the semi-finals! My semi-final entry is now competing against 11 others in my category for a chance to go to the finals this summer.

The Beachbody Challenge ranks the entries, at least in part, due to their dramatic and compelling nature. I had lost 50 pounds, a non-trivial amount to be sure. However, I thought my story could inspire and uplift, not because of what I did, but why I did it.

For those of you who don't know, my father (in the blue shirt and suspenders) died about 10 years ago from complications of type 2 diabetes. I received my own diabetes diagnosis (CF-related) in 2019. As you can imagine, it's weighed heavily on my mind ever since. Dealing with multiple chronic health problems on top of normal (though demanding) responsibilities of life can be emotionally, physically, and spiritually draining.

Bottom line is that I take less for granted. My father didn't get to see me get married, graduate school, or any of that. My kids won't know him in this life. But, I'm going to know my grandchildren. I'm going to be there for my kids and watch them become adults. I'll be there for both their accomplishments and their challenges.

Adopting a healthier lifestyle is the real challenge, but these people, whom I love, are worth it.

09/02/2023

Playing around with Instagram filters 🤣

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