BlujayStudio

09/11/2025

The person licking the fire feels like the epitome of self-destruction, a representation of my old life: self-harm guided by darkness. This awakening, this fire, has burned away all parts of my life that don’t serve me. At first, it was the jobs, then the people who influenced me to think I was garbage for being different, for being gay. The fire represents the destruction of all that once was.

The fire continues to burn, though. This time, it’s burning away internal thoughts and beliefs that no longer serve me.

What’s currently burning away is the wound of perfectionism. This wound exists because of my limiting belief that if I’m not perfect, I’m not worthy, I’m of no value. Logically, I know that isn’t true. My heart doesn’t know that, though. So that’s what’s burning away, and it’s painful. But as painful as this is, I know that I’m gaining wisdom — wisdom that says simply because I exist, I’m enough. I don’t need the approval of others to feel loved.

11/09/2025

22/06/2025

It’s not easy for me to show up here. Social media has always felt… exposing.

I know it sounds illogical, but the fear of being seen runs deep.

And yet—this Tuesday, June 24 at 6 PM—I’m speaking at the North Hampton Public Library. I’ll be sharing how I’ve used journaling and creative practice as a path through emotional healing.

This talk isn’t about perfection. It’s about being with yourself, especially in the places you’ve felt unseen.

If you’re local and this speaks to you, I’d love to share space with you. 🌸

15/06/2025

Father’s Day doesn’t always feel like a celebration.
For some of us, it’s a reminder of absence, silence, or pain.
This year, I’m learning to show up for myself with the love, safety, and presence I never received.
I’m becoming the man my father couldn’t be.

08/06/2025

Last week, I shared the darkness — the voices of shame, the thoughts I hid, the masks I wore.

This next panel is a turning point.

It’s where I began to see clearly.
Where I started to name the harm I had internalized — and where a small spark of warmth returned to my heart.

One painting shows a match lit in the cold — a symbol of the first flicker of self-compassion.

Another is a self-portrait of me as a teenager, around 15 — the age I learned it wasn’t safe to be myself. I see now how young I was to carry that silence.

The abstract fire represents me as an adult, beginning to burn away the lies and labels I had accepted. It’s the moment the masks began to fall.

This is the middle of Open Your Heart — the space between despair and healing.
The fire hurts… but it also clears the way.

Thank you for being here.
More soon. 🌈

02/04/2025

Each one touches the receiver at a soul level. Words alone cannot convey the feeling, it’s something to experience.

21/03/2025

What if the version of God you were taught… wasn’t the full truth?

For years, I walked away, believing I had no place in God’s love. But over time, I found something deeper—beyond fear, beyond rules, beyond judgment.

The God I know today is love. Infinite. Unconditional. Already within us.

✨ If you’ve ever felt unworthy of divine love, hear me now: You are loved. Exactly as you are. No exceptions.

❤️ Drop a heart if this resonates. Read the full story—link in bio.

🙏 ✨