Topaz Healing

I practice primarily from a compassion-oriented perspective. In my practice, I embrace vulnerability and lean on the power of human connection.

I am dedicated to providing a therapeutic healing space that is Anti-Racist, LGBTQQIAAP+ affirming, Fat Liberating, Sex Positive, and Disability Justice Oriented. We can collaborate in building a solid foundation, in which we can begin to explore the challenges of our internal and external experiences. My approach to this work centers on the mind-body connection, nervous system awareness + relational equity as the most valuable components in healing from trauma. All of the biggest emotions are welcomed in the container we co-create. Trauma can create an imbalance in power dynamics and rigid options in our lives, so power-sharing + access to choice will be the anchor we often come back to.

01/13/2023

this may be the inspiration to get my creative streak back on track in this little virtual world.

miley clearly over here telling us about growing her secure attachment with herself

*which I’m sure she did through the support of some solid community*

andddd WE LOVE to hear it !

✨I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can✨

#2023

12/30/2022

The Southern Appalachians may not have the same visual “wow factor” as the Wasatch or other breathtaking mountainous areas I’ve had the privilege of exploring.

However, these rolling hills hold a comfort and a wisdom that is unmatched by any young + flashy mountains I know.

I am grateful for both the kinship and the solitude I get to experience this season! I am grateful for gentle summits! I’m grateful for my relationships to the humans and the mountains and lots of things in between!

Also, it is pronounced app-uh-latch-an.

Sending everyone some tender love and care into this new Gregorian calendar year. ✨

12/11/2022

Today we celebrate 2 years of Topaz Healing. It has been an amazing journey and experience of building community, and we look forward to the community healing we will have the opportunity to creating and facilitating for years to come.

Holidays can often be a tender + stressful time of year for many. In our culture, we are spoon fed loud messages related to how things should look and feel. One of the most painful parts of trauma + relational wounds is being told ‘we should have a different internal felt experience than the one we are currently having.’

During a time of year where we are encouraged to be ‘merry,’ it’s not surprising that we are left feeling alienated and alone with our complex holiday emotions. The loneliness of being told our internal experience is wrong can be a heartbreaking experience.

On Sunday December 18th from 3p-5p MT, we are hosting an experiential practice of creating, securing, and embodying boundaries to support our relational experiences during the holiday season.

Participants will receive tangible skills they may apply in their life. Our offering will contain moments of intention embodiment, compassionate communication skills + experiential practices in the support of likeminded individuals.

To celebrate our anniversary, lifetime access to the Topaz Healing Library is included with registration.

Follow our scheduling link to join us. We look forward to seeing you on December 18th.

12/10/2022

👋🏻 I'm Caroline Pegram, LCSW. I am a white, able-bodied, neurodiverse, q***r person from the South living with complex trauma who uses collective and internal liberation approaches to find healing. I have learned from intersectional feminists, abolitionist activists, and q***r theorists and embrace the perspectives offered by these mentors.

💕 I’m a human healing from complex trauma, tending to her attachment wounds, and validating the hell out of big, messy emotions that show up in the process.

In my journey, I have learned to use stones as an anchor in my relationship with nature and encouragement to be in the present. A few years ago, I made a connection with the semi-precious stone Topaz due to its sweet symbolism: grounded and humble, sensitive and strong.

Topaz is hard, but it cracks very easily. It’s beautiful and diverse. Topaz requires some pretty harsh environments to form before it is pushed up toward the surface over time. Topaz mirrors a similar process experienced when working with trauma and represents gentle guidance in mining our shadows.

☀️ As we approach 2 successful years of .healing, I want to thank everyone who has supported us along this journey, as well as those who are just learning about our work. Our anniversary is tomorrow, and as humans should, we will celebrate well 🎉

12/07/2022

It’s a reminder I can’t get enough of it seems. Our emotions are messengers, not enemies. When we listen they support. When we suppress they just get more creative until they are heard.

12/06/2022

🪐 We are social creatures. Our nervous systems are literally hardwired to find safety in the nervous system cues of others. Living in a vacuum is not an option. Our physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and LIBERATION needs are bound up in the needs of each other.⁠⁠
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🗻 There is a lot of rugged individualism and hyper-imposed self-responsibility showing up on this platform.⁠⁠
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“Heal yourself”⁠⁠
“Change your life”⁠⁠
“Stop being a victim”⁠⁠
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🤷‍♀️ I just can not with these kinds of catchphrases that lack nuance and only seem to operate with microsystems.⁠⁠
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✨ I am all for looking at my own personal process, especially as a means of creating more compassion and understanding for myself and others. I’ve found that self-reflection and taking ownership of my shortcomings has been an integral part of freeing myself from the shackles of shame.⁠⁠
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♡ However, all of my needs are not my responsibility. Yes, I am a grown-up. Yes, I am quite independent and capable of caring for myself.⁠⁠
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🤝 But I am human, I am interconnected with all living things and I am trying to survive late-stage c*pitalism (in which all living things are currently being threatened).⁠⁠
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🌱 Our needs are interdependent on each other, so caring for you is caring for me. I think there is a way to re-adopt these natural animal instincts. Maybe there is a way to recondition ourselves towards the pack mentality without taking it to the length of codependence. ⁠⁠
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🌟 Anyways, I’m just over here dreaming up a world in which our needs were met with abundance and we are able to care for each other without the fear of scarcity.⁠⁠
healing

12/03/2022

✨ Caroline Pegram, LCSW, TCTSY-F will be hosting two opportunities to better understand what boundaries are, what they may look like + how to actively hold compassionate boundaries even in our most complex relationships.

❄️ In this Embodied Boundaries for Holiday Season offering, participants will walk away with tangible skills they may apply in their life. This offering will contain moments of intention embodiment, compassionate communication skills + experiential practices in the support of likeminded individuals.

Offerings will be made available on two different occasions:

- On December 11, 2022, in-person gathering at Trolley Healing Hub located at 515 South 700 East Suite 2D Salt Lake City, Utah 84102 from 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm. Financial exchange is $80 per person.

- On December 18, 2022, a virtual experience of this same workshop from 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm Mountain Time. Virtual exchange is $50 per person.

Scholarships available upon request!

🔗 link in bio to sign up!

12/02/2022

Neurophysiology: a branch of physiology and neuroscience that studies nervous system function rather than nervous system architecture.

AKA - the meanings our neurological system has accumulated from our lived experiences (data). The ways in which we survive in action + real time.

This is a process that begins its development in utero (some may argue it starts even earlier). It’s a process shaped by our environments, caregivers and larger systems that impact our access to safety.

We don’t consciously choose how we learn to survive. These deep networks are rapidly developing in our childhoods without our awareness.

When we recognize where our survival patterns originate, we begin to understand what influences how we show up in the world + why we tend repeat to repeat behaviors .

While it may seem counter intuitive, acknowledging the ways in which we have not had control in our own development may increase enough self-compassion to then lean into the grief + alchemy work to heal these internal systems.

I’ve spent a lot of time with the book Scattered by Dr. Gabor Matè after. This insight I’m sitting with is inspired by his reflections in chapter 29 of his book. If you’re interested in learning more, this is a resource I recommend!

11/30/2022

✨ I don’t have all the answers, but I do have some perspectives + practices that you may find helpful.

11/25/2022

❄️ Here are a few mindful ways to show up with some trauma awareness in relation to others.

Not exhaustive, but helpful insight! More to come in time ~

11/20/2022

🫣 Sneak peek at some of the themes we will be experiencing + exploring in my upcoming workshop Embodied Boundaries for Holiday Season.

On December 11, 2022, Caroline will be offering an in-person gathering at Trolley Healing Hub located at 515 South 700 East Suite 2D Salt Lake City, Utah 84102 from 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm. Light refreshments and tea will be available.

On December 18, 2022, Caroline will be offering a virtual experience of this same workshop from 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm Mountain Time.

Relational care is a part of our human experience that is an absolute need, not a luxury. I am looking forward to exploring + growing curiosity around the ways in which honoring our own needs + communicating boundaries can lead us to more fulfilling and safer relationships with those we hold dear.

11/18/2022

I know we mean well when we provide tutorials and ‘how to’ suggestions when it comes to healing trauma and accessing safety.

There are some key components to working with trauma that we consistently find helpful for many different kinds of people.

*and*

I start to feel a pause and resistance in my own body when I hear individuals (providers, facilitators, coaches, etc) start to give prescriptive suggestions on how individuals can start to “feel safe” in their lives and bodies “again.”

1. Who knows if an individual has ever experienced a conscious feeling of safety in there bodies?

2. There is absolutely no way I can know that if breathing deep in your body is going to offer the same support that breathing deep in my body offers.

I believe these A + B = C formulas for repairing trauma are deeply influenced by our cultural desire to heal fast, quick and easy. I also believe these approaches have the capacity to be re-traumatizing.

In these prescriptive approaches of “move your body this way, to get _____ desired outcome” - assumptions are being made about someone’s lived and embodied experiences.

When we are reminded that what we are feeling in our bodies is “wrong” because we should be feeling “at ease” or “safe,” we create potential for trauma patterns to be significantly reinforced.

For individuals who have complex relationships with their bodies related to trauma - you are invited to explore the idea that you are not wrong for the way you experience your body.

This is a reflection I hold dearly and am deeply passionate about. I hope to support other healing practitioners begin to better understand + implement more trauma aware approaches into their unique offerings.

Address

515 South 700 East Suite 2D
Salt Lake City, UT
84102

Website

http://www.topaztraumahealing.com/

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