Faith Deeter Get All Your Relationships Right

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Faith Deeter Get All Your Relationships Right

Master all of your relationships. What are natural principles? Natural principles come from nature and have been a part of our makeup from the beginning of time.

No matter what type of relationship you’re in, whether it’s parent/child, romantic, or work-related, your relationship is governed by natural principles because, YOU are governed by natural principles and so is everyone else. Similar to instincts, these principles tend to govern the way human beings behave. They are underlying factors as to why we feel happy, fulfilled, anxious, or lonely. By understanding what is natural for a person, you can work in harmony with them. When we don’t understand what is natural, we are more likely to make mistakes. For almost twenty years, people have been coming to me when they need help. They come when their spouse is leaving them, when their kids won’t listen, or when they are unhappy in their life and need a change. The way I help every person is unique to their situation, but the paradigm I use is always the same. I use Natural Principles. It is my hope that by sharing these principles with you, you will have a road map that can keep your relationships strong as well as guide you in knowing what to adjust when you run into trouble.

02/14/2026

Have you ever found yourself having the same argument over and over again? The words might
change, but the pattern stays the same—raised voices, defensiveness, and no real resolution.
It’s frustrating because we keep thinking, if I just say it louder, maybe this time they’ll get it. But
more pressure doesn’t create more understanding.

In horsemanship, Ray Hunt put it simply: “Fix it up, and let the horse find it.” If something isn’t
working, the answer isn’t to push harder—it’s to adjust. Sometimes that means changing the
smallest thing: your timing, your feel, or your own position. And those tiny shifts can change
everything.

The same is true in relationships. Instead of repeating the same words, try a softer tone. Instead
of confronting in the heat of the moment, wait for calm. Instead of defending, ask a question.

You don’t always need an overhaul. Often times, a small adjustment is all it takes.

If you want a step-by-step program that helps you shift relationship patterns in small but
powerful ways, piece by piece, you’ll find it at NaturalRelationships.com.

02/13/2026

Getting triggered doesn’t mean you’re broken or doing something wrong. It means something important is happening — and your nervous system wants you to pay attention.
Sometimes, a trigger is a sign of unresolved pain. A reminder of an old wound that still needs care.
Other times, it’s a signal that your boundaries are being crossed right now.
Both are valid.
The key is to pause and listen before reacting. Ask yourself:
Is this reminding me of something from the past?
Or is this a cue that something happening right now isn’t okay with me?
You don’t need to ignore triggers, and you don’t need to obey them blindly either. You need to understand them.
That might mean doing some healing work. It might also mean saying “no,” speaking up, or stepping away.
Your triggers aren’t the enemy. They’re messengers.
And when you listen with clarity — not shame — they can help you grow and protect yourself at the same time.
So the next time you get triggered, ask:
What is this trying to tell me?

02/12/2026

It’s a fine line between asking for what you want and criticizing what you don’t—and that line can make or break how the other person responds.
A request is future-focused and actionable. A complaint is past-focused and critical.
“You never call” is a complaint.
“Could you call me after work this week?” is a request.
Research on conflict shows that couples who frame needs as requests rather than complaints are far more likely to stay connected and avoid escalation (Gottman).
If you want change, make it easy for the other person to know what to do, not just what you don’t want.
Requests build bridges. Complaints build walls.
When you speak up today, listen to your words. Are you building a bridge or a barrier?
To learn how to ask for what you want without triggering defensiveness, visit NaturalRelationships.com.

02/11/2026

It feels good to try to help someone, and there's nothing wrong with supporting the people we care about. But there's a difference between healthy support and using someone else's problems as a way to avoid doing our own work.
Sometimes, the urge to fix someone else is really about avoiding something in ourselves. Their mess is just easier to focus on than our own. It may give us a sense of accomplishment and purpose while keeping us safely distant from whatever we're not ready to face in our own lives.
But here's the truth: healing ourselves doesn't come from "fixing" other people. Other people don't need to be fixed. Our own growth comes from being honest about what's actually happening inside of us. Our own work — the uncomfortable conversations, the patterns we need to change in ourselves, the dreams we've been putting off — that's where our real transformation lives.
The good news is, when we stop trying to manage someone else's process, we finally get to face our own. The energy we've been pouring into their transformation can finally go toward our own growth.
What's one thing you've been avoiding in yourself by putting all your energy into someone else?

02/10/2026

📣 NEW COURSE: Never Fight Again
What if conflict didn’t have to tear you apart — but could actually bring you closer?
Most people were never taught how to resolve disagreements in a healthy way. So we yell. Or shut down. Or give in…
It doesn’t have to be that way.
In my self-study course Never Fight Again, I’ll show you exactly how to:
✅ Stay calm during conflict
✅ Be heard without fighting
✅ Repair trust after an argument
✅ Set boundaries without guilt
✅ And finally feel safe and respected in your relationship
This isn’t talk therapy. It’s a practical, step-by-step process based on what I’ve taught for 25+ years as a licensed marriage and family therapist.
You go at your own pace. And you don’t have to wait for the other person to change.
Real peace starts with new skills. And you can learn them.
14 videos
💻 Enroll now and get instant access: https://f.mtr.cool/zkjalcosma

02/09/2026

If you’ve ever heard that women are “too emotional,” I don’t agree. Feelings are signals — and women are often highly attuned to them. That’s not a flaw; when used well, it’s a feature.
Sensitivity is like having a finely tuned radar — it can detect subtle shifts in tone, safety, or connection that others might miss. Most women are instinctively wired to bond, nurture, and protect. And biologically, there’s a good reason for that: females across species tend to be smaller and therefore more vulnerable to predation. Nature equipped them with heightened awareness to keep themselves — and their offspring — safe.
If you’ve ever seen a mother hen, cow, or mare get separated from her babies, you know — her alarm bells go off immediately. That’s biology doing its job. People often say it’s the male’s job to protect, but it’s also deeply natural for the female to protect — especially to safeguard connection.
The trouble comes when that radar assumes every blip means danger, or when those signals are expressed in ways that sound like emotional attacks instead of concern. It’s a bit like a horse spooking at a napkin floating in the breeze — the instinct is right, but the interpretation and delivery may need refining.
So men — the next time you feel like dismissing a woman’s concern because it doesn’t seem relevant to you, remember what my husband, a commercial airline pilot, always says: “Listen to your co-pilot — they’re usually right.”
When women learn to communicate their insights with calm confidence and not reactivity, their sensitivity becomes their superpower.
The truth is, women aren’t too emotional — they’re wisely attuned.
Learn how to turn that attunement into calm, clear communication at NaturalRelationships.com.

02/07/2026

Have you ever been in an argument where someone’s words or actions seemed over the top?
Maybe they lashed out, went silent, or shut you out completely. Our first instinct is often to
address the behavior: “Don’t talk to me like that.” “Why won’t you just engage?” But behavior is
just the surface. Underneath is always a feeling—fear, shame, stress, or overwhelm. It’s the
feeling that is driving what you see.

Tom Dorrance used to say, “First get with the horse, then the horse gets with you.” He knew that
what looks like defiance or resistance in a horse is usually just fear or confusion. If you punish
the behavior, you never solve the root. But when you work with the feeling underneath, the
behavior shifts naturally.

People are quite similar. If you respond only to behavior, you might win the moment but lose the
connection. But - if you respond to the feeling, you create safety which often builds
connection—and connection changes everything.

So the next time conflict flares, instead of snapping back, pause and ask yourself: What’s the
feeling underneath this reaction? When you can see the feeling you’ll know how to respond in a
way that brings connection instead of distance.

If you’d like a step-by-step program that shows you how to get to the real roots of conflict—so
change actually lasts—you’ll find it at NaturalRelationships.com.

02/06/2026

The real goal of conflict resolution isn’t to declare a winner. It’s not about who’s right, who started it, or who had the worst day.
It’s about identifying what needs to change so the pattern doesn’t keep repeating.
Blame keeps us stuck in the past — dissecting what went wrong, assigning fault, and defending positions. But progress lives in curiosity. When both people can shift from “Who’s to blame?” to “What’s not working?” something opens up.
In nature, pressure often leads to adaptation. A river doesn’t blame the rock for being in the way — it carves a new path. Slowly. Steadily. Over time, the whole landscape changes.
Relationships work the same way. Conflict is often a signal that something in the system needs to shift. It’s not failure. It’s feedback.
Research from the Gottman Institute shows that 69% of relationship conflict is perpetual — meaning it won’t go away unless the system changes. And systems change when people stop blaming and start looking for solutions.
In my courses, I teach how to recognize the deeper need behind the tension, and how to create meaningful, lasting change without escalating or shutting down.
So the next time conflict arises, ask yourself:
What needs to shift here — in me, in the dynamic, or in how we’re handling this?

02/05/2026

So many people hold back their needs out of fear of seeming “too much.” But here’s the truth: expressing a need doesn’t make you needy—it makes you healthy.
Needs are the foundation of connection. When they’re unspoken, they turn into frustration or resentment. Research on attachment shows that people who communicate their needs directly experience more secure, satisfying relationships.
The key is how you express it. “Could we spend more time together?” feels direct, but it’s also clear and constructive. Compare that to silence, which breeds distance, or to complaints like, “You’re never home,” which spark resistance.
Expressing a need isn’t about control—it’s about clarity. You’re not telling someone what to do; you’re sharing what would make you happier. When you do that, you give the other person a chance to meet you there. That’s partnership.
If you want to learn how to express your needs without guilt or fear—and build relationships grounded in mutual respect—visit NaturalRelationships.com.

02/04/2026

Having needs is natural. We need to eat. We need to drink. And emotional needs are no different. Having needs isn't a weakness. It's part of being human and alive.
But somewhere along the way, many of us learned to downplay, deny, or apologize for having needs — especially in relationships. Here's what's important to know: unmet needs don't just disappear. They build under the surface. They show up as resentment, burnout, over-giving, or pulling away without explanation.
You might find yourself exhausted and unsure why — until you realize you've been ignoring what you actually needed all along.
Don't feel guilty for needing support, time, space, or rest. What matters is finding healthy ways to honor those needs and getting curious about how to meet them — not just stuffing them down.
What's one need you've been pushing aside that's ready to be acknowledged?

02/02/2026

If you’ve ever believed that men care less about relationships than women, you’re not alone — but I haven’t found that to be true. In fact, in my practice, it’s usually men, not women, who make the appointment to get help. Does that surprise anyone?
Most men care far more deeply than what shows on the surface. Research shows men speak fewer words per day than women, which means their communication is often more succinct. But fewer words don’t mean fewer feelings.
Many men were raised with rules like: Don’t cry. Don’t be a sissy. Don’t show your feelings. They were taught to suppress emotion, not express it — and when they did, they may have been judged for it. When you think about it, what we, as a society, ask of men and little boys is a bit cruel. So when men do care deeply, it often shows up through doing: fixing, providing, protecting, or providing advice — even when it wasn’t asked for…or wanted. :-)
Women, on the other hand, are often tipped off by pain — they sense when something feels off and want to repair it quickly. Men are often motivated by loss — they feel the impact once connection or comfort is gone. That doesn’t mean they don’t care; it means they often miss the early signals. What can look like indifference is usually misunderstanding — he doesn’t realize something’s wrong until the disconnection has already started.
So before assuming a man doesn’t care, look again — and look differently. A man’s caring may sound more direct, quieter, or less emotional, but it’s no less real. The truth is, men don’t care less — they often care differently, and sometimes more deeply than they show.

Learn a step-by-step way to read the quieter signals, translate actions into care, and respond in ways that build connection at NaturalRelationships.com.

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