Next Level Counseling & Consulting, LLC

07/16/2025

Everyone 🌺

05/13/2025

Narcissistic systems thrive on drama but your healing needs stillness

Recovered survivors of trauma aren’t “picky”—they’re fierce guardians of the peace they nearly died to claim. After years spent drowning in a narcissistic mother’s chaos—her jealousy, her sabotage, her relentless need to compete with your light—you’ve learnt the cost of tolerating toxicity.

This isn’t about judgment. It’s about survival. You didn’t claw your way out of the fog of gaslighting, grieve the mother you needed, or rebuild your nervous system from ash to let conniving patterns back into your sanctuary. Narcissistic systems thrive on drama, but your healing thrives on stillness.

Let them call you “cold” for refusing to play their games. Let them spin tales of your “arrogance” because you no longer shrink to soothe their egos. Every boundary you set isn’t avoidance—it’s defiance. Proof that you’ve traded survival mode for sovereignty, and you’ll burn bridges before letting anyone drag you back.

To everyone protecting their peace like the sacred flame it is- Your boundaries are a revolution. Keep guarding them.

05/13/2025

The real glow-up isn’t a new hairstyle or a curated Instagram feed—it’s the moment you stop seeing yourself through her eyes. Narcissistic mothers plant mirrors that distort your reflection- “You’re too dramatic.” “No one will love you like I do.” “You’ll never survive without me.” For years, you internalised these lies, mistaking her criticism for care and her control for protection.

This glow-up is demolition work. It’s smashing those warped mirrors and rebuilding your self-image from the ground up. It’s realising that her “lessons” were shackles: the way she mocked your dreams to keep you dependent, weaponised guilt to keep you compliant, or hijacked your milestones to keep you small. While friends learnt self-esteem, you mastered survival tactics—silencing your voice to avoid outbursts, shrinking your sparkle to dodge her envy, trading authenticity for scraps of approval.

Healing is rebellion. It’s wearing the outfit she’d call “too bold,” pursuing the career she’d ridicule, and saying “no” to the guilt trips that once paralysed you. It’s rejecting her script where you’re the sidekick in her drama, and finally starring in your own story. Each boundary set isn’t just self-care—it’s a Molotov cocktail hurled at the prison she built.

Yes, she’ll rage. She’ll recruit flying monkeys to label you “selfish” or “ungrateful.” Let them. Their outrage is proof you’re winning. Every time you prioritise peace over her chaos, every time you choose self-trust over her conditioning, you’re not just glowing up—you’re resurrecting the self she tried to bury.

05/11/2025

A new study led by MIT neuroscientists reveals an exciting discovery about how the brain unlearns fear, with dopamine playing a critical role in this process. Dopamine, a neurotransmitter linked to reward, activates specific neurons in the amygdala to drive the extinction of fear, challenging the previous notion that fear extinction is simply about suppressing fear. This new finding could have profound implications for treating anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

The research focused on a specific neural circuit involving the ventral tegmental area (VTA), known for encoding surprise and teaching the brain to adapt. Dopamine released from the VTA targets neurons in the amygdala, specifically the Rspo2 and Ppp1r1b neurons. These neurons are responsible for encoding fear and fear extinction. Rspo2 neurons encode fear memories, while Ppp1r1b neurons encode extinction memories, which help the brain unlearn the fear. Interestingly, these Ppp1r1b neurons also encode reward, suggesting that the process of unlearning fear is linked to a positive, rewarding experience.

By using optogenetics and other experimental methods, the team demonstrated that activating dopamine in the VTA, specifically targeting Ppp1r1b neurons, accelerates fear extinction. Conversely, inhibiting dopamine in these neurons impairs fear extinction, highlighting the essential role dopamine plays in the process.

03/13/2025

Hyper-independence isn’t strength—it’s the armour I forged in a war I never chose.

Growing up with an emotionally immature mother meant learning early that needing help was a liability. Her unpredictability—the storms of rage, the droughts of neglect—taught me to rely only on myself. I became the architect of my own survival, building walls so high I mistook isolation for safety.

Now, asking for help feels like dismantling a fortress brick by brick. It’s not that I don’t want support—it’s that my nervous system still equates vulnerability with danger. Admitting I’m struggling? That’s not weakness. It’s defiance against the lie that love must be earned through silent endurance.

To anyone else who waits until they’re crumbling to whisper ‘I can’t do this alone’:
Your hyper-independence isn’t a flaw. It’s the tragic masterpiece of a child who learnt to parent themselves. But here’s the truth you deserve: needing others doesn’t make you burdensome—it makes you human. The people who stay won’t weaponise your softness. They’ll hand you tools, not tally your debts.

Healing begins when you let the walls crack. Let someone hold the blueprint. Let them say, ‘Rest. I’ve got you.’ Not because you’re broken, but because you’re finally safe enough to be tired.

Your mother’s emotional immaturity isn’t your legacy. Your courage to need, to trust, to receive? That’s your revolution.

03/13/2025

03/12/2025

Let’s be blunt, your narcissistic mother doesn’t care to know you—she cares to own you. To her, you’re not a person with dreams, flaws, or a voice. You’re a mirror to reflect her fantasies, a character in her script, a prop to soothe her ego. Her ‘love’ was never about connection—it was about control.

This isn’t cruelty; it’s clarity.
She doesn’t want to understand your boundaries, your pain, or your truth. She wants compliance. Silence. A version of you that fits neatly into her narrative of martyrdom or superiority. And when you resist? When you dare to exist outside her orbit? That’s when the mask slips—the rage, the guilt trips, the theatrical victimhood.

But here’s what she’ll never grasp- You are not a role to play. Your worth isn’t a debate. Your healing doesn’t require her consent.

To anyone still aching for her to ‘see’ you, stop begging for crumbs from a banquet she’s incapable of hosting. Your value isn’t measured by her willingness to acknowledge it. It’s etched into your bones, your resilience, your refusal to shrink.

Redirect that energy. Pour it into relationships that celebrate your messy, magnificent self. Into passions she’d sneer at. Into a life where ‘mother’ isn’t a synonym for ‘wound.’

You don’t need her curiosity to be whole. You just need your own.

03/12/2025

Preventing fear and anxiety 🙏❤️

02/24/2025

There's less fear when we know we're not alone.