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The Doula Club

Doula & Doula Matcher Hypnobirthing & Antenatal Classes, Pregnancy & Postnatal Yoga, Couples Yoga for Birth & Doula, North & East London

12/03/2026

The words you hear in that room matter more than you think.

Discuss the best way to communicate with your partner before the big day - it’ll make such a huge difference to you and them.

Save this and send it to your birth partner.

Tell them to screenshot it and practice!

And if you think this is helpful, check out my online birth course for you and your partner! It’s EVERYTHING you need to get birth ready - link in bio

10/03/2026

I don’t think many birth partners would know this.

You’re not just there for moral support. You are physically, hormonally changing what happens in her body by how you support her in that room.

Your touch triggers oxytocin - the hormone that powers contractions. your calm voice lowers her adrenaline - the hormone that stalls labour and blocks her body’s own pain relief.

Your presence when steady, protective, familiar - tells her nervous system “you’re safe. you can let go.”

It’s basic birth physiology.

I’ve supported hundreds of births. And I can tell you the births where the partner was calm, prepared, and present looked different. Not because of luck, but because of hormones.

The partner who breathes with her instead of panicking. The one who keeps their voice low when the room gets loud. The one who dims the lights without being asked and says “can we have a minute?” when things move too fast.

That partner isn’t just helping. They’re part of the birth.

They don’t need to be an expert, but they do need this.

Share it with them Get them to save it and keep reading it before the big day!

07/03/2026

I hear it all the time. “I’m just really scared of giving birth.”

And the response is almost always the same. Watch a positive birth video. Do a hypnobirthing course. Read the right book. Think positive thoughts.

As if fear is a mindset problem you can fix with the right playlist.

But fear in birth is functional. Your body is supposed to respond to its environment. That’s not a flaw, it’s how you’re designed.

A watched, bright, noisy, unfamiliar room full of strangers tells your nervous system the same thing it’s told every mammal for millions of years: this is not safe.

Don’t open. Not yet.

So when a woman says she’s scared, I don’t tell her not to be. I ask her what specifically scares her. And it’s almost never just contractions.

It’s not knowing what’s happening. It’s not being asked. It’s the stories she’s heard from friends who felt ignored or rushed or left alone. It’s the sense that once she walks through those doors, she stops being in charge.

That’s not anxiety. That’s recognising a pattern.

The most useful thing you can do before birth isn’t eliminate fear. It’s get specific about it. Name it. Then build a plan around it. The right environment, the right people, the right language, the right questions.

06/03/2026

A sweep is offered so casually that most women say yes without thinking twice. No pros. No cons. Just “shall we do a sweep?” like someone offering you a cup of tea.

But a membrane sweep is a form of induction. It’s a hand inside your cervix, separating the membranes from the uterine wall to try to trigger labour. It’s not nothing.

And it’s not just at 40 weeks. Alot of women are offered one at 38 or 39 weeks. For no clinical reason.

At 40 weeks your pregnancy is still completely normal. Your baby is not late. So it’s worth asking: why am I being offered an intervention right now?

None of this means sweeps are always wrong. If you’re well past your dates and facing a more formal induction, a sweep that gets things moving on its own terms can genuinely feel like the lesser of two evils. That’s a valid choice and a different conversation.

But a routine sweep at 39, 40, 41 weeks deserves more than a casual yes. Ask what the benefits are for YOU. Ask what the risks are.

And if you don’t want one? You can just say no. You don’t need a reason. You don’t need to justify your choice. It’s your body, your cervix, your decision.

05/03/2026

Induction requires a different birth plan and different support, but what that support looks like is rarely prepared for.

Everyone talks about contractions and breathing and when to go to hospital. But induction is its own world.

It’s long. It’s often boring. She’ll likely be in a bay on a ward with a curtain for privacy and strangers either side.

And then suddenly waters are broken the drip is introduced and it can go anywhere from intense and fast to ‘still not a lot happenin’. Whatever it is, she needs you right there.

Here’s what I want every partner know:

You can’t control the process. But you can control the environment. Close the curtain. Dim the lights if there’s a dimmer. Put headphones on her. Keep her upright and moving. Breathe with her when it ramps up

And when anything new is added to the process, you’re allowed to ask why. You’re allowed to ask for a minute. You’re allowed to ask if she can stand, or move, or have the drip turned down.

She’s going to remember two things about her induction: how it felt physically, and how supported and safe she felt.

Be the calm in the chaos.

04/03/2026

When your baby is born and goes straight onto your chest, skin to skin, your body does something extraordinary. Your chest temperature adjusts - warming up or cooling down to regulate your baby’s temperature. Better than any hat.

And that contact, the smell of your baby’s head, the instinct to kiss and nuzzle (and sometimes lick!) , isn’t just lovely. It’s functional. It triggers oxytocin. Oxytocin contracts your uterus. That helps reduce bleeding.

I’m not saying hats are pointless and in some situations a hat is needed. But skin to skin in a warm room does a better job of regulating temperature than a hat ever could. And removing that barrier lets the smell and contact do its thing, driving the oxytocin that helps your uterus contract and reduces bleeding.

Now, theatre is different. It’s cold. Uninterrupted skin to skin can be harder. A hat makes more sense there.

But in a warm room, with baby on your chest and a blanket over you both? You don’t need a hat.

You don’t put one on them when you’re at home!

You ARE the hat.

03/03/2026

I’ve supported hundreds of births. And here’s what I know for certain:

If you’re a partner who shows up prepared, it makes ALL the difference.

Not the one who’s read every book. Not the one with the perfect birth plan who has memorised it word for word.

But, the one who dims the lights without being asked. The one who stands at the door and says “can this wait?” The one who knows when to talk and when to just be there.

You don’t need to be an expert. You need to be present, protective, and paying attention.

Hospital staff are busy. They’ll walk in, flip the lights on, do what they need to do, and leave. That’s how the system operates. If that happens, your job is to put the room back together every time. Lights down. Door closed. Her space protected.

It’s the smallest things that make the biggest difference.

Save this. Share it with your partner. Or, screenshot the slides and put them in a note on your phone for the day!

01/03/2026

Told your baby is measuring small? Small for gestational age and fetal growth restriction are NOT the same thing.

It’s important to get clarity on it and ask all the questions before you make any decisions ❤️

Key questions to ask if you’re told your baby is small:
Is baby proportionally small, or is there concern about growth restriction?
What do all the tests show? how’s the blood flow through the placenta?
What does the pattern of growth look like over time?

Save this in case this is your situation x

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