Un-Patterned by Minky K

22/12/2025

Imagination Is Sacred. It’s how new worlds are born. ✨☺️
Visit webiste - link in bio


🙏

02/12/2025

You don’t need to fix your past - you just need to stop letting it define you.
Sometimes we think healing means going back and rewriting every chapter.

But the truth is this:
Your power is in who you choose to be today - not in who your past conditioned you to be.
You’re allowed to grow.
You’re allowed to change.
You’re allowed to outgrow entire identities.
You are not your history - you are the author of what comes next.

Want to release the inherited patterns keeping you small?
Visit my website: https://minkyk.weebly.com/
Minky Koekemoer | Un-Patterned

21/11/2025

With everything happening in our country right now - women standing up, speaking out, and refusing to carry the shame or blame for violence done to them - this message feels even more urgent. Guilt does not belong to us for someone else’s actions, choices, or harm.

And while I was having my own little wobble the other day, a friend reminded me: “Read page 20 of your own book.”
OMG. The laugh I had!

So, here’s the reminder - for me, for you, for all of us.

Let’s Drop the Guilt, Shall We!

That lingering guilt… the kind that shows up when you say no, take a break, ask for space, or - heaven forbid - actually enjoy yourself!
Yeah, that one. It’s time to let it go.

Because guilt is not a moral compass. It’s an inherited default setting from generations of women trained to serve, appease, and self-sacrifice like it was an Olympic sport. And we’ve won gold in it, time and again.

But guess what? That game is rigged, and we’re done playing.
You don’t need to feel bad for taking up space, taking care of your needs, or delighting in the simple pleasures of life. That’s not selfish - that’s sacred.

Rest is not laziness. Pleasure is not indulgent. Saying no is not a crime.

We were programmed to feel guilty for wanting more - more love, more peace, more joy, more chocolate, more sleep, more or***ms (yep, I said it). We learned to shrink, apologise, and compromise just to be liked, needed, or approved of.

But here’s the revolutionary truth:
You don’t need permission to feel good.
You were not born to be in service to everyone but yourself.
You’re allowed to want more.
You’re allowed to shine.
You’re allowed to feel sexy, silly, powerful, radiant, raw, soft, messy, and gloriously human - all in one day.

You are not here to be the unpaid emotional labourer of the universe.
So go ahead.
Drop the guilt.
Set it down gently… or throw it off a cliff.
Either way - don’t carry it one more step.

This reminder comes from my book OMG! I Remembered Me!
https://www.soulessence.co.za/omg-i-remembered-me.html

Full extract live on my blog: https://www.soulessence.co.za/minky-k-blog

21/11/2025

20/11/2025

04/11/2025

Failure to Launch - Houston, We Have a Problem! 🚀
(Extract from my book, “OMG I Remembered Me!” by Minky Koekemoer)

In my practice, I’ve met countless women stuck on the launchpad of life - brilliant, soulful, wildly capable women who are circling the runway but just can’t seem to take off. Whether it’s in love, work, creativity, purpose, or simply giving themselves permission to want more, the struggle is heartbreakingly real.

And spoiler alert: even the most outwardly “together” women often carry a hidden wound. Still seeking their mother’s approval. Still terrified of outshining the people who once dimmed them. Still quietly asking: Am I allowed to want this?

This is what I call the Mother Wound in action.
It’s subtle. It’s sneaky. And it’s been running the show from behind the curtain like a shadowy stage manager with a grudge.
It shows up as self-doubt, self-sabotage, guilt, shame, and that nagging fear that if we finally do shine, we’ll be punished, abandoned, or - worse - ignored.

But here’s the truth bomb, straight from the cosmic control tower:
You were born for lift-off. 💫

The real, gritty, glorious inner work of healing isn’t about becoming some shiny, perfect version of yourself.
It’s about peeling back the layers and reconnecting with the luminous, unfiltered you that’s been buried under decades of inherited fear and outdated scripts.

It’s not just about healing.
It’s about launching - your light, your joy, your unapologetic brilliance.
Launching the dream you’ve secretly carried.
The voice you’ve muted.
The life you’ve been told was “too much,” “not practical,” or “someday.”

It’s about reclaiming your place in the world - not as someone who’s here to serve everyone else’s needs - but as a force of nature, here to embody your own sacred, soulful YES.

And yes; the old systems will grumble. The inner critic will throw one last tantrum. The people around you might fumble and flinch as you shed the old skin.

But guess what?
You’re not here to be comfortable.
You’re here to be free.
So grab your truth. Strap on your courage.
The countdown has begun. 🚀

💫 Extract from my book, “OMG I Remembered Me! Break the Patterns. Reclaim Your Power. Remember Who You Are.”

Artwork Ronnie Biccard

Available on Amazon and Takealot
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29/10/2025

Un-Patterned - How Do You Know You’re Still in Survival Mode? 💫 🥰
By Minky Koekemoer – “Un-patterned” Blog | October 2025
Excerpt / Preview

If you’re always exhausted, overthinking, people-pleasing, or proving - that’s not a personality trait.
That’s survival mode.

Your nervous system is just trying to keep you safe. It’s loyal, protective, and sometimes exhausting. The shift begins when you start listening instead of pushing.

💭 Ask yourself:
“What part of me is still trying to stay safe the old way... through control, effort, or proving?”

Read more about recognizing survival mode and beginning the un-patterning journey here:
https://www.soulessence.co.za/minky-k-blog/un-patterned-how-do-you-know-youre-still-in-survival-mode

For more information visit: https://www.soulessence.co.za or https://www.facebook.com/RiseWomenRise2/

P.S. If you loved this, my book OMG I Remembered Me! dives even deeper into breaking old patterns and remembering who you really are.

Grab your copy! ✨
If you’re in South Africa, you can order the paperback directly from me. I’ll make sure it gets to you safely. For yourself or as a gift to someone who needs a little un-patterning magic.

📩 Send me an email: minky2@mweb.co.za to order.

Alternatively:
Takealot – https://www.takealot.com/omg-i-remembered-me/PLID99589572
Amazon – Paperback: : https://www.amazon.com/dp/1834924596
Ebook: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FRSPWBN2

-Patterned

14/10/2025

We’re born whole, wild, unfiltered… then life teaches us to shrink, please, and perform.

My latest blog is all about becoming un-patterned - letting go of old scripts, reclaiming your power, and remembering who you truly are.

Link to Blog: https://www.soulessence.co.za/minky-k-blog/un-patterned-the-art-of-remembering-who-you-are

For more information visit: https://www.soulessence.co.za

P.S. If you loved this, my book OMG I Remembered Me! dives even deeper into breaking old patterns and remembering who you really are. Grab your copy here: Takealot – takealot.com/OMG or Amazon – Paperback: amzn.to/OMG-Paperback | Ebook: amzn.to/OMG-Ebook

16/09/2025

🚀 It’s finally here!
After years of healing, writing, laughing (and crying), I am beyond thrilled to announce that my book OMG! I Remembered Me! is about to be published.

This book is for every woman who has ever felt stuck in old patterns, carried wounds that weren’t hers, or wondered if she was “too much” or “not enough.” It’s about breaking free, reclaiming your power, and remembering who you truly are.

✨ Break the patterns.
✨ Reclaim your power.
✨ Remember who you are.

This isn’t just a book—it’s a call to rise.

💛 Thank you to everyone who has walked this journey with me. I can’t wait to place this book in your hands.

Stay tuned for launch details soon! 📚🔥