Ruth Larwill Psychotherapy and Counselling

10/06/2024

The urge to ask for people’s advice and options can often come from being stuck in functional freeze. We think maybe someone else has the “right” answer. And often when we get advice that doesn’t align, or we get different options— we get even more stuck.

We get stuck in this cycle because we don’t trust ourselves.

The practice of making our own choices sounds simple. But it’s a profound act. It takes getting quiet and asking: “what makes sense for ME?” Not for anyone else. Then, following through with our choices gives us incredible feedback. We can learn, grow, and learn how to trust ourselves in the process.

This is especially important for people who grew up in homes with strict, controlling, or domineering parents. Agency gets lost in childhood, so looking outside of ourselves becomes a habitual pattern.

The truth is: no one really knows what they’re doing. We’re all guessing to a certain extent. And the best wisdom of all comes from within us. It’s our silent intuition that speaks to us and guides us when we have the courage to listen

CAN YOU MAKE DECISIONS WITHOUT CHRONIC ADVICE SEEKING?

21/05/2024

If you missed seeing the film at the cinema, you can watch this beautiful film about Nary - a brave young woman who has found healing, hope and purpose after being rescued from s*x-trafficking here: - https://vimeo.com/user121919064/freetobeme
It has been such an honour to be part of Nary's healing journey and I welcome any enquiry from those who are interested in cutting edge trauma therapy that is safe, gentle and does not retraumatise.

21/04/2024

I was able to speak into how to cope with challenging world events such as the Bondi Junction stabbings. You can here my radio interview here: https://omny.fm/shows/96five-interviews/jess-chats-with-ruth-larwill-about-how-to-handle-d?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTAAAR3wURokwVV5eP9DH5RHKbH8gkEMFFCEi-XEZqvuApZVpSKAqxsEklvPScM_aem_AckFWLTJAtx1XW3fm0ONIbPdJgiZSAUet1vOoEG0XPgZ-3ToIY4yP6UOZY7t-ptzXk5L8p7yDd4D2I2FvR9q5yme

96five's Jess Drummond speaks with counsellor and psychotherapist Ruth Larwill about how to handle difficult and traumatic news.

02/02/2024

Please, please, please do yourself a favour and listen to this eloquent interview from Rose Hunter who is a survivor of the s*x industry. As Australia moves towards decriminilising s*x work, Rose presents the option of the 'Nordic Model' that enables women a true choice for their future. Rose's experiences echo what I hear over and over in my work with survivors. Bravo Rose! Bravo!!!

https://www.abc.net.au/listen/programs/religionandethicsreport/rose-hunter-speaks-out-on-traumatic-experience-in-s*x-industry/103404996?fbclid=IwAR251rUJo0-viTzAez3ATCNb01200FXBLCodDrlYxr1Ai1QfXVlbMJfcWSI

Rose Hunter is a s*x industry survivor, and she's urging South Australian politicians to rethink their support for full decriminalisation of the trade.

25/01/2024

BIG announcement - The premiere of our Bloom documentary "Free to be me" will be on Friday 8 March at Dendy Cinema Coopooroo!!! Nary will be flying in from Cambodia for the premiere and there will be a Q&A after the film, where you can meet Nary in person! Get in fast and book your free tickets for the premiere here: https://free-to-be-me-brisbane-premiere.raisely.com/
Here is a link to the film trailer: https://vimeo.com/905847823

Dates for the premiere in other Australian cities.

Brisbane - March 8th - free-to-be-me-brisbane-premiere.raisely.com/
Townsville - March 9th - free-to-be-me-townsville.raiselysite.com/
Sydney - March 19th - Stay tuned for ticket release
Melbourne - March 20th - Stay tuned for ticket release
Sunshine Coast - March 26th - Stay tuned for ticket release
Online Premier - March 27th - Stay tuned for ticket release
Gold Coast - April 5th - Stay tuned for ticket release
Canberra - April 16th- Stay tuned for ticket release

Get your tickets to see the documentary: Brisbane - March 8th - https://free-to-be-me-brisbane-premiere.raisely.com/ Townsville - March 9th - https://free-to-be-me-townsville.raiselysite.com/ Sydney…

14/07/2023

Looking forward to presenting again at the Asia Region Anti-Trafficking Conference in Bali on Tuesday.

08/06/2023

Join me on Tuesday evening to learn about the latest trauma research and what we are doing at Bloom to work with survivors of s*x-trafficking.
Date: Tuesday 13th June 2023
Time: 7.30pm (AEST)
Registration: Click here to register https://signup-aus.keela.co/webinar-registration-inside... (a Zoom link will be sent on the day)

Join us on a webinar: Inside the Mind of a Survivor

Hosted by Ruth Larwill (Bloom Asia Founder and Director of Trauma Care), we'll explore the neuroscience behind the biological changes that happen when we experience trauma. With this knowledge, we'll discuss practical ways to assist survivors in their healing journey.

The session will include ground-breaking research and practical demonstrations of trauma-informed care.

You will come away with a greater appreciation of the incredible strength of trafficking survivors, as well as practical exercises to improve your own mental wellbeing.

Date: Tuesday 13th June 2023
Time: 7.30pm (AEST)
Registration: Click here to register https://signup-aus.keela.co/webinar-registration-inside-the-mind-of-a-survivor (a Zoom link will be sent on the day)

20/05/2023

For helpers, givers, empaths, and compassionate-hearted folks, our unboundaried notions of loyalty can cause us to stay in toxic and harmful situations long after the warning signs arrived.

This can happen in all sorts of dysfunctional or troubled relationships, whether a partner, friend, family member, and even a workplace, church, or group.

We become progressively more and more miserable (because, hello, humans don’t respond well to being treated poorly), but we don’t know what else to do.

After all,

😟 “Love never gives up.”

😮‍💨 “If I work harder, I can change them.”

🤐 “I can handle the way they treat me — I’m resilient. They’re too fragile to handle my (fair and necessary) complaints, since they’re so deeply wounded every time I express dissatisfaction, so I’ll stop making them.”

🥺 “Their behavior comes from old trauma, therefore it’s not their fault…and therefore I’m not allowed to be hurt by it, because that would mean I’m not being sensitive to their trauma.”

Any of these sound kinda familiar?

What are the messages that you were told about unboundaried loyalty?

By the way, discovering how to become boundaried can help to change this.

Yep. Honor-based (pro-relational!) boundaries are kind and respectful to others…while also being kind and respectful to *ourselves.*

Because that’s the one part of the loyalty equation we’ve forgotten.

Ourselves.

❤️
Molly
Cartooning the boundaries (because boundaries are for kind people, too)!

Want help?

My approach to boundaries is pro-relational and honor-based. This method gives our relationships the best possible chance of success if there’s any hope to be had (and often there is!), and yet also equips us with a powerful “inner red flag detector” (and the courage to make hard choices) when it becomes clear that a relationship is truly harmful to us.

Visit my website for more support and resources, including my totally free intro class! 🦋

20/05/2023

07/04/2023

Good job to this Mum who is doing such a great job with emotional coaching!

The Gottmans have identified four styles of parenting emotions:
1. Emotion Dismissing (ignoring emotions)
2. Emotion Disapproving (where emotions are punished)
3. Laissez-Faire (all emotions are allowed, but without any boundaries or help with appropriate and healthy responses)
4. Emotion Coaching

28/02/2023

Such a powerful image to remind our amygdala (unconscious learned memory system) of what it can control and what it can only influence!

27/02/2023

The work that often takes place in therapy is learning how to maintain a 'solid sense of self' (that is, know who you are and what you stand for!) in the crucible of life - be that in relationships or existential challenges such as pandemics. I think this video is a great explanation of how to work towards a 'solid sense of self' via self-differentiation.

You are invited to celebrate with me my birthday and learn about the concept that has changed my life - Differentiation (developed by Murray Bowen and David ...