Christian Murfet - Therapeutic Strategist - LEAP Dynamics

03/04/2024

03/04/2024

Great thing to reflect on: if an adult can’t communicate, express their anger, or cope with frustration— why would a 7 year old be able to? Children’s nervous system capacity is shaped by the interactions they watch and receive. When overstimulated, children intuitively look to the adults around them. What they’re saying is “help me make sense of this” and “am I safe?” A regulated adult can see the child’s capacity as different from their own. They don’t see their children’s tears or tantrums as a personal insult or disrespect. Or something to dismiss. They don’t expect children to be robots or stoic. Their emotional stability manifests as consistent behavior. The child learns: “this adult I can trust. I know how they’ll react”

Instead of punishing or shaming, they can help the child through big emotions. And at the end of the interaction, there’s a deeper connection. A chronically dysregulated adult cannot cope with frustration or tantrums. They see their child’s emotions as a burden and use punishment in an attempt to quickly get them out of that emotion. This works— temporarily. Usually because the child is filled with fear. But after the interaction there is a loss of trust and connection for that child.

We need to as a society take a look in the mirror and see where our level of regulation is currently at. Then, we need to develop patience for children who are still learning to cope with boredom, confusion, rejection, and the daily disappointments in life.

By being the calm stable presence we change the future generation

03/04/2024

Parentification is when a child is forced to take on the emotional burden that a parent or caregiver would usually shoulder. This can include practical duties, such as paying bills, or emotional support, such as acting as a confidant. When children have to act like adults taking responsibility for their siblings, parents, and running a household there are lasting effects.

When you're taking care of everyone else, you learn to deny your own needs and feelings. Out of necessity, you have to push them away and as a result, you end up believing that your needs and feelings don't matter. https://ter.li/1eqtz3

03/04/2024

03/04/2024

Keep running the race !

23/06/2023

Sending love to everyone on their healing journey and struggling today ❤️

01/06/2023

Cortisol [body's stress hormone] is just as addictive as a drug. Some people will seek it out in unhealthy (and self-destructive) ways.

28/04/2023

28/04/2023

Did you know that engaging your five senses may help calm your worries? Try this next time you feel anxious. https://ter.li/a8mdxc

28/04/2023

When we look at behaviour we don't see the physicality of the brain health problem behind it. Dr Daniel Amen shows we need to look at psychological diagnoses as having a biological basis that requires effective treatment that sits outside the medical model. We need our Australian counterparts to replicate his groundbreaking work. Refer to his website for further information https://danielamenmd.com/

19/04/2023

Some of you need to read this twice... ❤️