26/04/2025
āØāWhat do we mean by ābottom lineā behaviours in CODA?ā
A bottom line is a boundary we set to protect our recovery and honour ourselves.
In Codependents Anonymous, we learn to break old patterns and build new ways of relatingāto others, and to ourselves. These bottom lines are gentle reminders of the boundaries we are learning to honour in recovery:
1. We do not say āyesā when we mean āno.ā
We practice honest communication and give ourselves permission to speak our truth.
2. We do not take responsibility for other peopleās feelings, choices, or outcomes.
We let go of control and trust that others are capable of managing their own lives.
3. We do not abandon ourselves to gain approval, love, or acceptance.
We stay connected to who we are, even when it feels unfamiliar or scary.
4. We do not fix, rescue, or manage others.
We honour each personās right to their own experience, and we focus on our own healing.
5. We do not make ourselves smaller to keep others comfortable.
In recovery, we learn to take up space and own our worth.
These bottom lines arenāt about perfectionātheyāre about progress, one day at a time.