01/09/2025
DROWSY BUT AWAKE BS
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When I help families with their child’s sleep, a good portion of our conversation is about re-learning what’s useful and put sleep training BS in the bin..
For years, parents have been told to put their babies down “drowsy but awake” - but with more research into infant sleep, we now know this advice is outdated and unrealistic for most families.
From an evolutionary perspective, human infants are designed to sleep in close proximity to caregivers. Contact, movement, and feeding aren’t “bad habits”… they’re biologically normal sleep associations that have kept babies safe for thousands of years.
Sleep science has moved on. We now understand that infant sleep develops gradually, shaped by the nervous system, environment, and parental responsiveness. Studies show that babies who are supported to fall asleep with help are not only normal, but may experience benefits in emotional regulation and attachment.
The “drowsy but awake” rule came from older sleep training teachings that focused on behavioural modification, expecting babies to self-settle on command. In reality, many infants simply aren’t developmentally ready for that. Pressuring them to comply can create stress for both baby and parent, rather than better sleep.
Instead of outdated rules and behavioural tricks, what helps most is:
✔️ Responding to your baby’s cues
✔️ Supporting them to sleep in ways that feel manageable for your family
✔️ Understanding that frequent waking and needing help to settle are normal in infancy
Your baby isn’t broken… the advice is.
Have you tried “drowsy but awake” with your baby? What has your experience been like?