Evolve Mental Health

Evolve Mental Health Perinatal & Couples Counsellor | Supervisor
Support for Mothers, Couples and Professionals

I, like many of you struggle to say a simple "no". I over explain my reasons why, every single time. In hope that I'm no...
06/12/2025

I, like many of you struggle to say a simple "no".
I over explain my reasons why, every single time. In hope that I'm not offending, creating a sense of ungratefulness, or coming across as rude.

Because I, like many of you, have grown up with "good girl" and "people pleaser" narratives. Simply saying "no" is not tolerated nor acceptable and so I must let you know my reasons why, in hope you understand and can validate my "no".

This causes much more internal pain and twisting than necessary and often ends up with my "no" being invalidated and persuaded to a "yes" .

Clear is kind and a "no" is pretty darn clear.

If you, like myself and many other Mothers I work with, find it hard to "simply say no" this might be something to reflect on and perhaps a goal to work towards.

Share this with a Mother who might need the reminder this month 😉

Kindly,
Ashleigh

27/11/2025

Birth Trauma is often misunderstood- or dismissed entirely.
Trauma isn't defined by medical notes or WHAT happened.
It's defined by how safe, supported and in control someone felt in the moment.

Birth trauma affects:
👉 the birthing parent
👉 the partner
👉 the couple
👉 older siblings
👉 the family unit

For many the Trauma doesn't show up as a clear "event" or "timestamp".
It shows up in hypervigilence, emptional numbness, irritability, nightmares, disassociation, hyperactivity, defensiveness, substance use...just to name a few.

And when trauma sits between two partners, it can impact communication, closeness and the ability to reach for each other.

If this I'd your experience, there is nothing wrong with you. Your body and mind are responding to something that felt too much, too fast or too overwhelming.

is a reminder that your story matters - that the support you need is here, when you need it.

As part of my support services I offer birth debriefs for indoviduals and couples.

Kindly,
Ashleigh



26/11/2025

I see all too often how the social narratives of masculinity play out in Fatherhood.

These are the scripts from men in sessions who have only been "allowed" to subscribe to the rules of masculinity:
➡️ stop feeling
➡️ start earning
➡️ avoid meaningful connection
➡️ pursue status

Men are coming to sessions feeling deflated, useless and confused. Women want men to be more relational but they've never been given the road map or the tools to do it.

It's often in that transition to Fatherhood that men have more permission to "soften" with their children and become more aware of how harsh the rules have been on them and how limiting they are for intimate connections with their partners.

My goal in sessions with couples is to give men permission to step outside the rule book that dictates how they show up and create relational, emotional and psychological safety for men to step into their authentic selves. To allow them to show up for their families and be the Father they truly want to be.

If you are curious about couples work pop an enquiry through via my website so I can help demystify what goes on and how we work.

Kindly,
Ashleigh

10/11/2025

I work with many adult survivors of child sexual abuse, neglect, domestic and family violence or attachment trauma and one thing many women don't realise is that even when you think you have "healed" mothering can bring up so many unknown triggers.

Body autonomy and lack of control can feel profoundly disruptive and unsafe to a mother who has a history of body autonomy and boundaries being violated. Hypervigilence means every bit of sensory input feels overwhelming and flooding.

In our sessions we talk to these triggers, we acknowledge them, confront them and find a new sense of safety within them. Because mothering doesn't stop when you are triggered.

We don't always focus on the narratives that got you to therapy, we skim the surface first, establish safety and once we have some stable foundations to work from we dive deep (if that's where you want to go).

Trauma work looks different for everyone, but is absolutely needed if you want to show up as the Mother you want to, and deserve to be.

If you are fumbling through trying to find your way and unsure where to start, reach out. It all starts with a conversation to help guide you to the right space and fit for your journey.

You aren't broken, what happened isn't okay. You deserve better.

Kindly,

Ashleigh
mh

I have done this community a disservice and I think it's about time I did better. I hear you, I see you. Kindly Ashleigh...
06/11/2025

I have done this community a disservice and I think it's about time I did better.

I hear you, I see you.

Kindly
Ashleigh
mh

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Forresters Beach, NSW

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Tuesday 9am - 7pm
Thursday 9am - 7pm

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