28/02/2026
I was never encouraged as a child, if I did well at anything my dad would always say "why didnt you do better?" "Its not good enough"
Anything I showed interest in was shut down, I was told I'm not smart enough, Ill never amount to anything
I was raised in a very toxic abusive environment, I wanted to thrive but spent the majority of my childhood trying to survive.
By age 14 I was an emotional mess smoking pot, getting in trouble and I remember my year 8 coordinater saying to me "you will never amount to anything" exactly what my dad had said, labled as being a bad kid. No one bothered to ask if I was ok, what was happening at home, if I needed help, guidence support.
I had dreams but no one bothered to ask or to care.
I was trying to process emotions I had no intelligence for and my nervous system was fried.
Its taken me a good part of 25 years to unravel and still unraveling! And these days Im so grateful for those experiences. Its been through years of yoga, meditation, intentional art, movement, sound, nature, plant medicine, healing modalities such as acupuncture, massage, kinesiology, inner child work and so so much more.
I am learning to be in a state of inquiry, to be curious about why I do things or say things or behave in a particular way, to come face to face with the deep seeded programming thats playing in my unconcious being and bring it to the light of awareness so that I may create a new way of being.
The story I have unraveled is one of not being smart enough, good enough worthy to have dreams.
I have written a new story where I am my best support system, Im in my corner, Im cheering for me, Im feeling the fear but im not going to let that stop me because I am deserving of good things and I can achieve great things and make the world a more beautiful place along the way. To help those who are suffering and heal togther along the way!
And so on Monday I start my degree in Chinese Medicine.
I will learn chinese remedial, gua sha. Medical Qi gong, accupuncture and chinese herbal medicine
It will take me around 8 years to complete as I will be studying part time so I can keep my business going, have quality time and adventures with kyah, paint, dance and surf!
There is no way I would have thought this would have been a possibility even 10 years ago but here I am, Ive got my lab coat, my accupuncture man and some light reading to get me started ๐คฃ thanks Karen Thomas
If you feel fear, if you have a critical voice in your head dictating how you live, get curious, ask some questions, keep showing up even when it feels like you are going nowhere, become aware of the stories holding you back and choose to create new ones.
You are the author, the editor, the illistrator, the main charactor and the publisher.
Never stop dreaming ๐๐คฉ