02/10/2025
Real talk about love in relationships. I think love has been a lesson for many of us myself included! I personally will admit that I have relied on the other person to make me feel loved at times.
Annnnnnd I’ve always had this idea of an epic fairytale love story and even to this day I have found myself at times getting caught up on what it “should” comparing our story to others and at times getting stuck in the comparison. Focusing on the parts that weren’t working and coming into a space of demand and expectation.
Its easy for humans to loose touch with why we love our individual love story and can create disharmony and at times can feel as if you are at war with each other and then at war with yourself.
I’ve seen it in many lives in the couples sessions I’ve done people lose their spark, doubt their future, question if this is the one they are meant to be with and I mean don’t get me wrong sometimes it is a straight up honest answer of this is not your person! Butttttt… in many cases it’s a communication break down and being distracted from why you chose each other in the first place
I had a conversation recently and the words this person said to me was “love without expectation” These words ran through me like a big wake up wave from spirit!
Reality is (WE) need to be the person (WE) need and if we’re going to be in a relationship with another than we need to truly learn to love without expectation ✨
Remember who they are as an individual and and not tie our own happiness to whether the other person behaves how you had hoped, to love as an act of giving rather than a transaction and find peace by not measuring if it’s equal
How many times have you heard the saying when your with the right person Love should be easy?
(I’m tapping into my brave pants here as I type this!!!) but I don’t necessarily agree with this, I think love has easy times for sure! But I also think love is hard at times as is life….
We go through lessons and hopefully learn, grow and expand before we completely lose touch, so if this speaks to you try not to compare your love story to how you think it should be… love it for what it really is, when it’s in shadow see the invitation for what this means for YOU what are you learning about yourself through this?
And then when it’s in bloom adore it for its sweetness and bask in its beauty!
Each part of light and dark makes it what it is YOURS and UNIQUE
Maybe it holds traits of courage, strength, happiness, cuteness, resilience, dedication, loyalty, laughter but it’s real in all its forms.
Obviously, we still need to create healthy boundaries and express our hearts desires and our dreams for the future, but it all comes down to communication and sometimes figuring out how to communicate as a team can be a challenge but if we don’t give up, remain consistent and clear with each other I think many of us have beautiful potential
And though it may not be that magical fairytale it is love. It is real. It’s tricky at times but it’s also amazing at others!
Throw kids into the mix and well that’s a whole other story but I think creating that time at least once a month to have no distractions for a date night is key at keeping that spark alive. It might be extravagant, full of passionate sexy time and deliciousness and other times it might be boring, exhausted and plain but it is still that time to connect with each other reminding you of the individual you chose to love and that mirror between you both is clear again
So on that note if you’ve made it to the end of this post ponder on loving without expectation and what that means for you
And if you have a partner go and give that unique individual a gesture of love❤️
And if you haven’t found your person yet be the person you need because when they come along, you will naturally be ready to love without expectation
This pic was from a recent date night me and my one had after what I’m ashamed to say almost 6 months of no date night! We were completely burnt out. War had struck and we clearly missed each other! Our date night was rushing to get to the island in time before sundown We made it !! getting attacked by midges but sitting by the fire having great conversations a couple of delicious drinks and noodle box watching the sunset and rise and cuddles in the swag which was super uncomfortable and forgetting to bring breakfast not realising that island life doesn’t open till 9 am 😂 but it was still as awesome as ever ! xx