Mohamed Rima

Mohamed Rima Social Media Disclaimer: This page and posts are not therapy or a replacement for a professional counselling relationship or mental health care.

Relationship Education
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Buy me a coffee ☺️ 🫶🏻 https://buymeacoffee.com/thecouplescounsellor I don't provide counselling via messages. No social media posts should be considered personalised professional advice. This is not a crisis service. If you're in a crisis call Lifeline on 131114 or 000 for emergencies.

Abusers hurt you then punish you for feeling it.Abusers cause pain then deny your right to name it. If they control your...
23/02/2026

Abusers hurt you then punish you for feeling it.
Abusers cause pain then deny your right to name it. If they control your feelings, they control you.

An abusive person will always try to convince you that you don’t deserve to feel what you feel after they've hurt you. They’ll minimise your pain, rewrite the story, and decide for you whether your experience was “bad enough” to matter. In their world, only they get to decide when you’re allowed to have emotions which conveniently ends up being never. This is how they manage their fragile grandiose false self from ever taking accountability.

They can hurt you emotionally, psychologically, or physically. They can lie, cheat, belittle, betray, and break you down. But the moment you express pain, they flip the script:
“It wasn’t that bad.”
“You’re exaggerating.”
“You’re too sensitive.”
“You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

This is how abusive people protect their power by invalidating your reality until you start doubting your own. When you doubt your own reality, you are controlled. The abuser writes your reality for you and gets away with taking accountability to maintain their abusive behaviour and deceptive lifestyle.

And if you’ve internalised this mindset, if you believe other people don’t deserve to feel their feelings unless their suffering meets your personal threshold... unlearn it. That belief is toxic. That belief is abusive. That belief is exactly how harm gets justified and repeated.

People are allowed to feel what they feel. Full stop.

18/02/2026

Kindness shouldn’t be a performance for an outcome. If it’s only “kindness” when it gets you s*x, then it’s not kindness, it’s strategy.

Emotionally immature people aren’t calm, they’re just better at hiding their chaos. They call you “too emotional” while ...
16/02/2026

Emotionally immature people aren’t calm, they’re just better at hiding their chaos. They call you “too emotional” while reacting with big emotions like defensiveness, rage, and blame. They can’t communicate so everything feels like an argument, and they lack accountability so everything feels like an attack.

Never put the person you’re getting to know for marriage on a pedestal.Putting someone you’re getting to know on a pedes...
15/02/2026

Never put the person you’re getting to know for marriage on a pedestal.

Putting someone you’re getting to know on a pedestal is idealisation. Idealisation is when we create positive illusions about a person and exaggerate their virtues while minimising or completely ignoring their red flags.

We do this because we want to believe we’ve found our soulmate — someone who can meet all our needs, soothe all our fears, and disprove the negative core beliefs we hold about ourselves, such as “I’m not good enough,” “I’m not worthy of love,” or “I’m unattractive.” We also do it to avoid the anxiety and uncertainty that comes with acknowledging the reality of being single.

Idealisation stops you from seeing your potential partner as they truly are, and it creates unrealistic expectations that are guaranteed to collapse. It can also blind you to signs of incompatibility, unhealthy behaviour, or betrayal. And when the idealisation wears off, you’re left feeling disillusioned, angry at yourself, and slipping back into the same low self-esteem that reinforces those negative core beliefs — “See, it’s true, I’m the problem, I’m not worthy of love” — making you feel even worse.

No one can change your negative core beliefs or your internal dialogue except you. These deeply rooted beliefs will push you to force the person you’re getting to know into the fantasy you’ve created, instead of focusing on the actual human being in front of you, the compatibility between you, and their behaviours.

Idealisation feels like hope, but it blinds you to reality.

Clarity comes when you stop worshipping the potential and start observing the person.

The narcissistic parents groom their children for other abusers to abuse them. They conditioned them to believe abuse is...
15/02/2026

The narcissistic parents groom their children for other abusers to abuse them. They conditioned them to believe abuse is normal "relationship problems."

Sometimes the most powerful boundary is accepting who someone is, and refusing to keep hurting yourself trying to make t...
11/02/2026

Sometimes the most powerful boundary is accepting who someone is, and refusing to keep hurting yourself trying to make them someone they’re not.

09/02/2026

Set an intention about paying attention to the small ways you disconnect from yourself.

09/02/2026

A healthy break during disagreements protects the relationship. Healthy couples know how to take breaks and return to the discussion when they said so.

Another angle of dismissive‑avoidant attachment in an enmeshed son: punishing women for wounds his mother created. ...
07/02/2026

Another angle of dismissive‑avoidant attachment in an enmeshed son: punishing women for wounds his mother created.

If you’re asking “Is this abuse?” it’s already a sign something in your body knows the truth. Abuse isn’t always a black...
04/02/2026

If you’re asking “Is this abuse?” it’s already a sign something in your body knows the truth.
Abuse isn’t always a black eye. Sometimes it’s the fear in your chest when he comes home. The way you shrink yourself to keep the peace. The constant monitoring, the put‑downs dressed up as “love,” the money you’re not allowed to touch, the pressure you can’t say no to, the Jekyll‑and‑Hyde and love bombing that follows the abuse cycles that keep you confused and off‑balance.

Your nervous system notices patterns long before your mind can name them.

If you are in danger call 000. For free support and counselling contact the domestic violence and s*xual assault hotline 1800RESPECT 1800 737 732.

02/02/2026

What's the difference between avoidant attachment and narcissism?

Narcissistic abuse summarised.
30/01/2026

Narcissistic abuse summarised.

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Liverpool, NSW
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About Me

I have been actively involved in community work for over 15 years focusing on grassroots work in the Muslim community. I am also a co-founder and General Manager of MIA - Markaz Imam Ahmad, a very active Islamic community centre in the heart of Liverpool CBD. My focal work in MIA is the development of youth in the light of Islamic teachings and building them to be productive in our community. MIA also serves as giving the youth a place to belong and feel accepted.

I have a passion for seeking knowledge and have been for many years under some of Sydney’s well known and respected Imams and teachers. I am currently on my 4th year and final semester in completing a Bachelor of Arts in Islamic Studies through the International Open University (IOU).

I am a qualified and insured counsellor and registered with the ACA - Australian Counselling Association. I have a dedicated private practice in Liverpool, NSW and my focus as a counsellor is to help my clients reach their potential and support them to transform personal challenges into life enhancing opportunities. This is achieved by providing a neutral, confidential, non-judgemental safe space, listening to their concerns and customising a therapeutic plan that suits their situation.

I am trained in the Gottman Method Couples Therapy (level 2) and have a passion in working with couples improve their relationship. I blend my methods to tailor for my client’s needs, whether it be one maintenance session you require or an in-depth therapy catered for your needs, marriage is something worth investing in.