RMB Psychology

31/12/2025

As 2025 comes to a close and we step into 2026, I find myself reflecting on our common humanity in a world that is not always forgiving. We are all vulnerable, wanting connection, seeking to be held, either physically or metaphorically, with love that is pure. We crave respectful touch, so we can be wrapped in compassion and understanding. We seek people we can talk to, who can hear and share with us in holding our pain, and can bear our tears when we cry.

Over the last 18 months, when my youngest became gravely ill, I was confronted again by a system that was rigid, fixed, inflexible, ableist, and shaming. I became voiceless in my advocating, and invisible in a system that could not acknowledge what I knew, both as a parent of a neurodiverse additional needs child, and as a practicing trauma-informed psychologist.

No one could hear my voice.

I ceased to exist in a world where I thought my voice mattered.

Where I thought my voice, I, could make a difference.

Through my child's countless procedures and hospitalizations, I connected to those surrounding us, listening to others in pain, or seeing other children laying in hospital rooms next to hers, and in doing so, I connected to humanity's suffering in a way that was profound for me. The range of emotions I have experienced in this short period of time has been acute. Chronic on acute. My body has vicariously felt everything done to my daughter, and it's been heartbreaking.

I also witnessed indifference, a coldness, or perhaps on reflection, numbness. We all have a choice in how we cope with the world and what it offers us.

I reconnected to my faith in a way, perhaps befriending the possibility of death only truly can, and in it, I found that which I had always known, but fear had hidden from me. When the world shunned me, I turned inward. I connected to Divine love that allowed me to transcend fear—to not be consumed by it, but rather to sit beside it with compassion.

Through Divine love, I created safety for all my thoughts, memories, and experiences. In that safety, they found their voice. And I have found mine again.

Only love matters. Love that is pure, selfless, has no agenda, and in reality, is simply Divine. Love to self, not in a self-adoring grandiose manner, but rather in a compassionate way. To be able to forgive ourselves for the mistakes we have made. Love to others, to neighbour, that seeks nothing for yourself but offers genuine care and gratitude for their well-being. A gratitude and grace through which I feel, and see, life so differently. So indescribably deep, so insanely rich., no amount of money could buy it.

It's been nothing short of humbling.

My deepest wish for each of you in 2026:
May you find your voice. May you know your truth. May you understand that you are worthy of being heard, seen, and so much more.

You are connected to the Divine—we all are—and therein lies our common humanity, connected in pure love.

When systems fail us, when the world feels unforgiving, may you remember to turn inward.

You are connected to the Divine, we all are, and therein lies our common humanity, connected in pure love, to each other, and the world we all share.

I am you. You are me.

Praying for peace, good health and stability in the world around us all in 2026.

24/12/2025

The holidays can be tough.

You don't have to face them alone. 💚

RMB Psychology is open throughout the Christmas 2025 and New Year period 2026, providing continuous support for your mental health and wellbeing.

Whether you need ongoing care or someone to talk to during this time, we're here.

Limited appointments available.

15/12/2025

There are no words adequate to the weight of this moment.

Yesterday, on what should have been an evening of light, celebration, and community at Bondi Beach, darkness visited us in the most senseless and horrifying way. Fifteen precious lives were stolen from us. Families gathering to celebrate Hanukkah—a festival of hope and perseverance—were met with hatred and violence that has no place in our world.

We are shocked. We are heartbroken. We are grieving together.

This was an attack not only on the Jewish community, but it is an assault on all of us—on the very values that bind us together as Australians and as human beings. The cruelty of targeting families, children, people gathered in joy and faith, is something our minds struggle to comprehend. The senselessness of it all threatens to overwhelm us.

But even in our darkest hour, we witnessed the very best of humanity. We saw an ordinary man who became extraordinary in a moment of unthinkable courage, disarming a gunman with his bare hands and risking his own life to save countless others. We saw people sheltering strangers, running toward danger to help, holding each other as they sought safety. We saw our first responders—police, paramedics, emergency workers—running toward the gunfire without hesitation, treating the wounded with skill and compassion, securing the scene while their own hearts must have been racing with fear.

These acts of grace and courage remind us who we truly are. Hate may wound us, but it cannot break us. Violence may shake us, but it cannot defeat our humanity.

In the Days and Weeks Ahead:
Trauma from an event like this ripples through all of us—those who were there, those who love someone who was there, those who feel this attack in their very souls. Please know that what you're feeling is real and valid:

For those directly affected:
There is no "right" way to grieve or process trauma. Shock, numbness, anger, profound sadness, fear—all are normal responses to something deeply abnormal

Reach out to professional support services:
Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636),
Lifeline (13 11 14), and trauma counseling services are available 24/7

Allow others to help you. Accept offers of practical support—meals, childcare, company.

The Jewish community has specific support networks activating now—please lean on them

For all of us:
Stay connected. Isolation amplifies trauma. Talk to friends, family, colleagues. Share what you're feeling.

Limit exposure to graphic images and rolling news coverage if it's overwhelming you.

Stay informed, but protect your mental health.

Maintain routines where possible. Structure provides stability when the world feels chaotic.

Be gentle with yourself. Sleep may be difficult. Concentration may waver. Anxiety may spike. These are normal responses.

Look after your children. They're watching us to understand how to process this. Be honest but age-appropriate. Reassure them while acknowledging it's okay to be sad or scared

For the community:
Stand together. Check on your neighbors, especially those in the Jewish community who may feel particularly vulnerable right now.

Reject hate in all its forms. The answer to this darkness is not more division, but radical solidarity.

Support those who ran toward danger. Our first responders carry these traumas too. They are heroes, and they are human.

The road ahead will not be easy. There will be funerals to attend, lives to remember, questions that may never have satisfying answers. The grief will come in waves—sometimes when we least expect it.

But we will walk this road together. We will hold each other up. We will remember the fifteen lives taken from us, and we will honor them by refusing to let hatred have the last word.

To the families who lost someone yesterday: we see you. We grieve with you. Your loved ones will not be forgotten.

To the survivors: we stand with you. Your courage in the face of terror is extraordinary.

To our Jewish community: you are not alone. An attack on you is an attack on all of us.

Light will return. It must. Because that is who we are—a people who choose light over darkness, together over division, love over hate.

May the memories of those we lost be a blessing. May the injured heal. May we find strength in one another.

Professional Support Services:

Lifeline: 13 11 14
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800
NSW Health Mental Health Line: 1800 011 511

You are not alone. 💙

29/10/2025

🎓 Professional Development Milestone 🎓

II'm thrilled to share that I've just completed my Level 3 Internal Family Systems (IFS) training!

This intensive course has deepened my understanding of the profound healing that's possible, when we learn to access our Self-Leadership capacity and compassionately engage with all parts of our inner world.

IFS has been transformative in my work, and integrating it alongside EMDR and Somatic Experiencing allows me to offer my clients a truly holistic, parts-aware approach to healing.

I'm excited to bring these enhanced skills into my solo practice here in Melbourne, continuing to support people on their healing journeys with greater depth and nuance.

For those curious about IFS, it's a powerful therapeutic approach developed by Richard Schwartz that recognizes we all have different "parts" of ourselves—like an inner critic, a people-pleaser, an anxious protector, or a part that holds anger. Rather than trying to eliminate these parts, IFS teaches us that every part has a positive intention and is trying to protect us in some way.

The model identifies three types of parts:
Managers (parts that try to keep us in control and safe), Firefighters (parts that react when we're overwhelmed), and Exiles (vulnerable parts that carry painful emotions and memories from the past).
Beneath all these parts is our core Self, characterized by qualities like curiosity, compassion, clarity, and calm.

The healing happens when we can access Self-energy as it were, and turn toward our parts with curiosity rather than judgment. When parts feel heard and understood, they can release their burdens and step out of their extreme roles. It's beautiful work that honours the wisdom and complexity of our internal systems.

Grateful for the ongoing learning journey and the privilege of walking alongside my clients as they discover their own inner resources and healing capacity.

07/09/2025

ARFID Petition
Please sign the Petition advocating for individuals with a diagnosis of Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) to be eligible for rebated eating disorder care.

Why the Petition?
ARFID is characterised by persistent difficulty eating sufficient amounts or varieties of food, leading to significant weight loss, nutritional deficiencies, dependence on supplements or enteral feeding, and/or low psychosocial wellbeing. Unlike anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa, ARFID is not driven by concerns about weight or body shape but rather by sensory sensitivities, fear of aversive consequences (e.g., choking, vomiting), or low interest in food (Ramirez & Gunturu, 2024; Fonseca et al., 2024).

According to meta-analytic investigations, ARFID has an estimated pooled community point prevalence of up to 11% (Nicholls-Clow et al., 2024), compared to 3% for anorexia nervosa (Galmiche et al., 2019). Autistic children are disproportionately represented among those diagnosed with ARFID. Recent evidence shows that up to 54.8% of children with ARFID are autistic while 21% of autistic children are deemed at risk of ARFID according to a genetic study (Cobbaert et al., 2024).

ARFID-specific screening and diagnostic tools should be incorporated into Medicare eligibility assessments for eating disorder care (Eating Disorder Treatment and Management Plan, EDP). While ARFID is predominantly conceptualised in the context of childhood, the medical literature highlights that it is a chronic and lifelong disability that also impacts adults (Ruiz Fischer & Starr, 2024; MacDonald et al., 2024). Therefore, ARFID care must extend beyond childhood and include autistic adults as well. At present, the exclusive reliance on the Eating Disorder Examination Questionnaire (EDE-Q) to assess eligibility for an EDP excludes those with a diagnosis of ARFID, rendering them unable to access rebated eating disorder care. Indeed, the EDE-Q primarily focuses on anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa and is not intended to assess ARFID. Expanding assessment criteria to include validated tools such as the Nine Item ARFID Screener (NIAS) (Zickgraf & Ellis, 2018) would help ensure that autistic children and adults with ARFID are not systematically excluded from essential care pathways.

ARFID is a severe eating disorder with a higher estimated prevalence than anorexia nervosa and disproportionately affects autistic individuals. ARFID has serious consequences ranging from malnutrition and cognitive difficulties to permanent organ damage (blindness, osteoporosis) and death (Schimansky et al., 2024; Bourke et al., 2025; Birmingham Mail, 2024).The serious medical, nutritional, psychosocial, and cognitive consequences of ARFID are well-documented in the academic literature (James et al., 2024; Fonseca et al., 2024; Ramirez & Gunturu, 2024). The exclusion of ARFID from current Medicare eating disorder care urgently needs to be addressed to ensure affected individuals receive the multidisciplinary and lifesaving support they require.


References

Birmingham Mail. (2024, January 13). Mum’s warning after boy died after battling undiagnosed eating disorder. Birmingham Mail. Retrieved September 5, 2025, from https://www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/uk-news/mums-warning-after-happy-schoolboy-28440516

Bourke, C., Panteli, V., Marmoy, O. R., Thompson, D. A., Mankad, K., Sudhakar, S., James, G., Garnham, J., Connor, A., Cheung, M. S., & Bowman, R. (2025). Optic neuropathy associated with vitamin A deficiency in children: A case series. Journal of AAPOS. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaapos.2025.104277

Cobbaert, L., Millichamp, A. R., Elwyn, R., Silverstein, S., Schweizer, K., Thomas, E., & Miskovic-Wheatley, J. (2024). Neurodivergence, intersectionality, and eating disorders: A lived experience-led narrative review. Journal of Eating Disorders, 12(1), 187. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40337-024-01126-5

Fonseca, N. K. O., Curtarelli, V. D., Bertoletti, J., Azevedo, K., Cardinal, T. M., Moreira, J. D., & Antunes, L. C. (2024). Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder: recent advances in neurobiology and treatment. Journal of Eating Disorders, 12(1), 74. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40337-024-01021-z

Galmiche, M., Déchelotte, P., Lambert, G., & Tavolacci, M. P. (2019). Prevalence of eating disorders over the 2000-2018 period: a systematic literature review. The American journal of clinical nutrition, 109(5), 1402–1413. https://doi.org/10.1093/ajcn/nqy342

James, R. M., O'Shea, J., Micali, N., Russell, S. J., & Hudson, L. D. (2024). Physical health complications in children and young people with avoidant restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID): a systematic review and meta-analysis. BMJ Paediatrics Open, 8(1), e002595. https://doi.org/10.1136/bmjpo-2024-002595

MacDonald, D. E., Liebman, R., & Trottier, K. (2024). Clinical characteristics, treatment course and outcome of adults treated for avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) at a tertiary care eating disorders program. Journal of Eating Disorders, 12(1), 15. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40337-024-00973-6

Nicholls-Clow, R., Simmonds-Buckley, M., & Waller, G. (2024). Avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder: Systematic review and meta-analysis demonstrating the impact of study quality on prevalence rates. Clinical Psychology Review, 114, 102502. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2024.102502

Ramirez, Z., & Gunturu, S. (2024). Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder. In StatPearls. StatPearls Publishing. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK603710/

Ruiz Fischer, M. M., & Starr, R. A. (2024). A tradeoff between safety and freedom: Adults' lived experiences of ARFID. Journal of Eating Disorders, 12(1), 107. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40337-024-01071-3

Schimansky, S., Jasim, H., Pope, L., Hinds, P., Fernandez, D., Choleva, P., Dev Borman, A., Sharples, P. M., Smallbone, T., & Atan, D. (2024). Nutritional blindness from avoidant-restrictive food intake disorder - recommendations for the early diagnosis and multidisciplinary management of children at risk from restrictive eating. Archives of Disease in Childhood, 109(3), 181–187. https://doi.org/10.1136/archdischild-2022-325189

Zickgraf, H. F., & Ellis, J. M. (2018). Initial validation of the Nine Item Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake disorder screen (NIAS): A measure of three restrictive eating patterns. Appetite, 123, 32–42.https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2017.11.111

Credit: Eating Disorders Neurodiversity Australia (EDNA)



https://www.aph.gov.au/e-petitions/petition/EN7379

e-petitions

21/06/2025

Not everyone has the right to hear your story, or can carry it with you. Choose carefully.

03/06/2025

Victoria is not much better, including child and adolescent mental health. Not fit for purpose.

We need more voices to rise up, and speak up, to the inherent failures in the public hospital and mental health systems in Victoria.

It serves us all to explore, understand and address the pathology within the public hospital and mental health systems (adult & child), before projecting the brokenness of the hospital system onto the pathogy of the patient.

It shouldn't have to be this hard to advocate for what is right and fair.

***de

Distraught families say the New South Wales public mental health system abandoned their loved ones when they needed care the most — and doctors warn the crisis is only getting worse.

08/05/2025

Dear all, if you could please donate, however small, this is for my youngest. Please share widely. Asking for help if it moves you. Thankyou.

smartpups-fundraise : Make a donation today to support smartpups-fundraise

14/03/2025

https://www.facebook.com/resiliencep/videos/1791799938268209

18/01/2025

For those with a child with a disability, especially a hidden disability, you really are doing the very best you can. I see you.

24/07/2024

27/05/2024

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
C.S. Lewis - The Four Loves

Artist: Catrin Welz-Stein