The Plumber, His Missus, & Her Brain Tumours

The Plumber, His Missus, & Her Brain Tumours Wife with a wheelchair
CNS tumour advocate

CAN YOU SAVE A STARFISH?ParableAn old man was doing his daily walk along the beach one morning, when he spotted a young ...
31/10/2025

CAN YOU SAVE A STARFISH?

Parable
An old man was doing his daily walk along the beach one morning, when he spotted a young boy crouched by the water, scooping something up from the sand and throwing it into the sea.

The beach was normally empty at this time of day, and so the old man stopped to watch for a while.

He noticed that the boy kept on shuffling a little further down the beach, then repeating this same action again and again – stopping, scooping, throwing, moving.

“What are you doing there, boy?” the old man asked, walking closer.

“I’m saving these starfish that are stranded” replied the boy, “if they stay on the beach they will dry out and die, so I’m putting them back into the ocean so they can live.”

The old man was silent for a few seconds.

“Young man,” he said, “on this stretch of the beach alone, there must be more than one hundred stranded starfish. Around the next corner, there must be at least one thousand more. This goes on for miles and miles and miles – I’ve done this walk every day for 10 years, and it’s always the same. There must be millions of stranded starfish! I hate to say it, but you’ll never make a difference.”

The boy replied “well I just made a difference for that one”, and continued with his work.

***********************************************************************

You don't need to do grand things to make a difference. Every small thing has a ripple effect. Find your tribe, do what you love, save a starfish.

Service above self.

Photo credit: Rotary Club of Laurieton
Photo description: Rach in a floral dress and green sparkly shoes sitting in her wheelchair, John is beside her in a blue shirt and jeans. They are looking at Graham, Rotary Club of Laurieton President as he inducts them into Rotary.

WHEN LIFE GOES FULL CIRCLEIn 1988 I decided I wanted to be an overseas exchange student. With the support of my long suf...
25/10/2025

WHEN LIFE GOES FULL CIRCLE

In 1988 I decided I wanted to be an overseas exchange student. With the support of my long suffering dad who was probably keen for a year off, I successfully applied to be a Rotary Exchange student.

I asked to be sent to Norway. I'm not saying the Rotary coordinator was dyslexic, BUT I ended up in Norman, Oklahoma instead.

As a mostly vegetarian atheist, from a big city in a small country, spending 12 months in a small town, in a meat loving bible belt state of a huge country, was life changing.

Part of my obligation to Rotary was giving speeches, the benefit of that is that I don't fear public speaking, something which has come in very useful.

36 years later The Plumber & I have become members of the Rotary Club of Laurieton. The members have been incredibly welcoming & generous. In particular Noel Hiffernan OAM who has gifted me a Firefly attachment for my wheelchair. Effectively this motorises my manual chair, awesome when going over long distances, and an item which was not in our budget. And since it's red, it will definitely go faster!

Photo credit: Leesa Baxter
Photo description: Rach in a multi coloured top sitting in her wheelchair in a park. The wheelchair as a motorised attachment on the front.

21/10/2025

When the Federal Minister of Disability has an office that is not accessible, what hope is there?

Some days I want to just curl up in a ball & cry.

Please watch & share.

Australia 2025-not good enough.

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1AiPnoJCch/

MAMMA MIA HERE WE GO AGAINOne of the challenges of our life together is navigating support workers. I have a fair select...
17/10/2025

MAMMA MIA HERE WE GO AGAIN

One of the challenges of our life together is navigating support workers. I have a fair selection over the last 4 years. A couple of truly awful ones, some average ones and some outstanding ones.

Having people so intimately involved in your life takes some adjustment. There's days where you just don't want outsiders seeing you at your worst. And it can impinge on privacy.

Buy, if you're lucky enough to get a great one, well it just works. Leaving Tracey my amazing support worker in Canberra was hard. I still really miss her. Happily I've found her sister from another mister in Nichole.

This week we had an excursion to see Mamma Mia, we both laughed so hard it hurt.

I also had the privilege of interviewing Michelle Hedger for Carer's Week. She and her husband are full time carers of their daughter Demi. She is a budding photographer, so take a minute and head over to her page and give it a like.

Life through the lens with Demi
https://www.facebook.com/share/1H3okeNPm8/

Rach x

Photo description
Rach & Nichole in a selfie. They are both smiling.

SEVEN YEARS MARRIED-NO ITCHES HEREIn a week that has been heavy with grief, it has concluded with some joy.The NDIS has ...
28/09/2025

SEVEN YEARS MARRIED-NO ITCHES HERE

In a week that has been heavy with grief, it has concluded with some joy.

The NDIS has finally agreed that I need an accessible bathroom. This has been a marathon journey that would not have happened without my awesome OT. I had five articles published in News Of The Area, and two were front page!

Today we celebrated 7 years of marriage. I feel like there were people that thought we wouldn't get here. The age gap [16 years], the large amount of children between us [seven of them aged 23-51], 2nd marriage for me and third marriage for John; not to mention my diagnosis and subsequent disabilities.. But it works. I can honestly say he is my ride or die, and I don't see that changing. Simply put, we're attuned.

We have celebrated by crossing two more items off the bucket list. Whale watching with the fabulous crew of Whalesong Cruises Hervey Bay. Not ashamed to say I cried when the first one breached. And last but not least the Mary Poppins Festival, something I have wanted to go to ever since I heard about it.

Love wins.

Photo description

John in a blue shirt, Rach in a navy dress. They have their arms around each other and are looking at each other with their faces touching. Behind them are some trees, it is their wedding day.

Link to our 4 minute wedding video in the comments. Video was done by the amazing Nick Haggerty, and I never get tired if watching it.

GRIEF IS THE PRICE WE PAY FOR LOVEThis is the week where a piece of me broke. My cousin Julia died very unexpectedly in ...
25/09/2025

GRIEF IS THE PRICE WE PAY FOR LOVE

This is the week where a piece of me broke. My cousin Julia died very unexpectedly in London. We never met, but nevertheless shared a special connection. I don't have the words to describe the absolute tragedy of her life. May she rest in love.

Then on Tuesday I had the privilege of interviewing an amazing woman-Emma. In 2010 Emma met Blake. They fell in love, got married & had a beautiful daughter named Sophie. Four years ago their life went in different directions, but they remained close. In July of 2024 Blake was diagnosed with a rare, aggressive cancer.

He endured absolutely brutal treatments, and gave it everything. During this he & Emma found their way back to each other, she told me that his courage has been an absolute gift. Blake is 40 next month, his prognosis means he is unlikely to be here to celebrate it.

As I spoke to Emma I could clearly hear her strength and the immense love she has for Blake.

So if you can be anyone this week, be Emma and Blake. Model courage and express love.

Pic description

A screenshot which reads: My Grandma told me,
"Marry someone you can suffer with."
I used to think that was sad.
Now I understand.
Love isn't who takes you to dinner.
It's who holds you when you're drowning.
And builds you a boat.

BUCKET LIST ITEM  ✅️ If you know me at all you know that marrying Jason Momoa is the  #1 item on my list. But item  #2 i...
21/09/2025

BUCKET LIST ITEM ✅️

If you know me at all you know that marrying Jason Momoa is the #1 item on my list. But item #2 is not something I've ever vocalised. Mainly because I honestly felt there was more chance of me becoming Mrs Momoa than achieving this one!

My maternal side of the family includes several journalists & authors. My earliest memories are of being a voracious reader. And my secret hope was that one day I too would have a paid piece of writing published.

Well I did it.

In fact I've done it 3 times in the last few weeks. And I'm planning to do it again.

Thanks to everyone who has praised my writing and reads my blog. On the days (like today) where I struggle to get out of bed the encouragement helps.

Rach x

Photo description
Photo of a newspaper page

I AM ENOUGHI contemplated several topics this week. Spinal Cord Injury Day, my very recent birthday, and my daughter's h...
06/09/2025

I AM ENOUGH

I contemplated several topics this week. Spinal Cord Injury Day, my very recent birthday, and my daughter's hens event.

Then last night we went to a show where I watched a frail, elderly lady struggle to walk. And I realised what I needed to write.

WE HAVE TO STOP DEMONISING MOBILITY AIDS. And yes I'm yelling as I write that. A few weeks ago I went to an art exhibition where a blurb about an artist stated that he was: restricted to a wheelchair.

No he wasn't. He also wasn't bound to a wheelchair. Or confined to a wheelchair. Rather he was a wheelchair user. So I emailed the gallery to draw their attention to this problematic language. [I know some of you are rolling your eyes as you read that.] But here's the thing, a wheelchair is an assistive device. As are glasses. But you never here anyone say, look at that woman, she is forced to wear glasses.

Often comments are made about how using a wheelchair means you have given up. You know you should try harder to walk. And the absolute doozie, you're too young to be in one of those. Yet as my very erudite Cousin Nathan pointed out, when we see someone using pot holders to get something hot out of the oven, we don't gasp and say oh do you REALLY need those? And you shouldn't be using those at your age.

Why does all of this matter? Because people internalise the negative language around assistive technology. And as they age they resist using devices that would make their life simpler, safer, and more enjoyable. They feel it will diminish them in some way. It doesn't, it enhances your life.

So do me a favour, watch your language.

And guess what? My wheelchair moves faster than your feet walking.

Photo description
A group of 8 people, mixed male and female. Seven of them wearing red heart shaped sunglasses, in the middle is my daughter PJ with white, pearl beaded, heart shaped sunglasses & a veil. Everyone is smiling & holding up paintings of Mt Fuji.

THE GIFT OF TIMEIn the last 3.5 years I've found the people that assist me fall into 3 broad categories.1. Friends/Famil...
22/08/2025

THE GIFT OF TIME

In the last 3.5 years I've found the people that assist me fall into 3 broad categories.

1. Friends/Family who are there because they love me.
2. Allied health professionals, medical staff, support workers. They genuinely care, but are also doing their job.
3. Randoms. They see the wheelchair or hear the story & want to join the pity party.

I've spent the last week at a wellness retreat run by the beautiful Brooke Elliston Yoga. She organised a group of 10+ ladies to volunteer to come to the retreat & be 1:1 assistants to help myself & 5 other spinal patients. These amazing ladies gave up time with their families, they put aside their paid work, and they incurred travel & accommodation costs. At the end of the retreat as we profusely thanked them for the generous gift of their time, they insisted on thanking us. They were grateful for the privilege of assisting us. My heart is SO full.

Since diagnosis I've had frequent encounters with the floor after falls. This retreat was my first time being on the floor intentionally since surgery. Completely amazing.

Extra special gratitude to my assistants: Talara, Libbie, Lauren & Steph.

Check out the comments for a video of me doing one of my favourite things: heading down a hill with my arms in the air.

Pic Description
1. Me lying on my stomach on the floor with my head raised like a turtle. I'm smiling. On the left is Libbie. She is also smiling.

2. I'm sitting on the floor, propped up against cushions, with my legs stretched out in front of me, & smiling. On the left is Talara, on the right is Lauren. They are smiling.

I AM HOMEMy current NDIS plan funds 28 nights of STA per year. STA stands for Short Term Accommodation. It enables disab...
25/07/2025

I AM HOME

My current NDIS plan funds 28 nights of STA per year. STA stands for Short Term Accommodation. It enables disabled people to have a break from their informal supports & engage in capacity building activities that align with their goals.

Blah blah, but what does that actually look like, and where are your tax payer dollars being spent?

For me STA is held in a purpose built facility for spinal cord injury patients in Collaroy. It is such a fabulous place to work that staff rarely leave. Which means when I arrive I'm greeted by name & everyone is aware of my insane Jason Momoa crush.

Being purpose built means EVERYTHING is accessible & I have a huge level of autonomy. A massive range of adaptive equipment means that I can engage in activities I wouldn't normally be able to do. I also get to socialise with other people with spinal cord injuries.

My current 2 weeks are extra specific, I'm having wheelchair 'driving lessons' with Dave the OT and intense one on one gym sessions with some fabulous physiotherapists & exercise physiologists from Queensland.

Being here is life changing & I'm so very grateful.

Photo descriptions

1. Rach sitting in her wheelchair smiling. On the left is Elisa who is resting her hand on Rach's shoulder while smiling. On the right is Holly who is smiling.

2. Rach standing up attached to a tilt table. (50 mins in this, the longest stand in 3.5 years.)

3. On the left is Anthony in sunglasses & a helmet, in the background is Bella in sunglasses & a helmet. They are both on bikes. On the right is Rach sitting in an adaptive bike with hand controls. They are on a bridge.

4. Rach sitting on an adaptive bike on a sunny day, looking out to the ocean.

THIS IS NOT THE LIFE I SIGNED UP FOR-CAN I HAVE A REFUND?I try & write as positively as I can, but sometimes keeping it ...
18/07/2025

THIS IS NOT THE LIFE I SIGNED UP FOR-CAN I HAVE A REFUND?

I try & write as positively as I can, but sometimes keeping it real means getting gnarly.

Our bathroom is not overly accessible or safe. But while we wait for NDIS to hopefully approve funding to rectify that, we make it work. Mostly.

On Wednesday night I fell getting out of the shower. I had also managed to inadvertently lock the door. So John & our youngest Sass had to get in & pick me up. I'm ok albeit in pain. What hurts the most & caused the bulk of my floods of tears is the sheer humiliation. At 53 I don't have the bodily autonomy to be able to shower on my own whenever I feel like it. And that sucks.

Thank-you (sarcasm) to the person who said: on the bright side John wasn't in the shower with you. Because he'd be traumatised now 🙄. Yeah alright it was a little bit funny. 😛

Photo description
Photo by me of the breakwall near us at sunset. A reminder that no matter how I might rage, the sun will continue to rise & set.

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North Haven, NSW

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