06/03/2026
My dog accidentally demonstrated one of the most important emotional skills we use with kids.
This is Augie in his very first automatic car wash… and he was not a fan.
You’ll see he’s pretty unsure about what’s happening. The noises, the movement, the big spinning brushes- it’s a lot. I’m patting him and talking to him while we go through.
A little real-life example of co-regulation 🐾
Co-regulation isn’t taking the feeling away. I can’t make the car wash less loud or confusing for him in that moment. But I can stay with him, reassure him, and help him feel supported while he experiences it.
It’s the same principle with kids.
When children feel scared, overwhelmed, angry, or upset, our job isn’t to immediately remove the feeling or rush them past it. Their brains are still learning how to manage big emotions.
What helps most is a supportive, safe adult presence.
Sometimes that looks like:
• sitting beside them
• acknowledging or naming what they’re feeling
• offering a hug or gentle touch
• talking them through what’s happening
• or simply letting them know they’re not alone in it
The goal isn’t to eliminate the feeling.
It’s to help them move through it with support.
Over time, children internalise this. They learn that big feelings are manageable and that they can get through them.
So if you ever feel like “just being there” while your child is upset isn’t really doing much… That’s co-regulation, and it’s one of the most powerful ways we help kids build emotional skills.