26/10/2021
why do I get so angry??
I work with a lot of women who worry that they have "an anger problem". They describe flying off the handle about small things, being intolerant and impatient, getting really angry about tiny imperfections and raging at their partner or kids even though they know the other person didn't mean to upset them. They feel ashamed about this and they worry what it says about them. They resolve every morning that today that will stay calm, but they end up raging by the end of the day.
The first thing to understand about anger is that it's an important feeling to have and it's all about keeping you safe. You need to be able to feel anger in the right circumstances. However when we have subconscious triggers, combined with anxiety and a lack of control or confidence this creates a perfect storm for irrational anger outbursts.
These women don't have an anger problem. They have anxiety. Anger is just the mechanism trying to keep them safe and in control.
Using wellbeing coaching we can work with both the conscious and subconscious mind to heal triggers, reduce the anxiety and increase your sense of confidence and control to deal with situations. Rather than putting so much energy into worrying about your "anger problem" you can focus that energy into resolving anxiety and increasing your confidence.