01/11/2025
It wasn’t the meds—it was how I talked about them.
I used to think collaboration meant talking it all through. Every med change, every dose, every side effect—I explained, prepped, checked in, and made sure we were “on the same page.” I’m a big talker so…it was A LOT of words. My heart was definitely in the right place. I wanted consent, partnership, and trust.
But the more I talked... the harder it got.
The more words I used, the more my kid shut down, panicked, or refused their meds.
And honestly? I get it now.
For PDA kids, even hearing about medication can feel like a demand. The idea that something is acting on them, changing them, is freaking scary. Being reminded, asked, or told about meds can send their already-vulnerable nervous system into overdrive. I thought I was helping by explaining. But if I’m really honest, I was putting pressure on my kid to give a verbal “yes” so I could feel better about the whole thing.
What changed everything? I stopped talking so much.
Short, factual, emotionally neutral statements replaced my “pep talks.” Mostly, I didn’t say anything at all. I would silently drop off a gummy or mix his dissolvable into ketchup. I didn’t hide it. I wasn’t being sneaky. I just wasn’t forcing him to talk about it every time. He was fine with taking his meds, as long as I didn’t force him to agree with it or call any special attention to it.
When he said “I don’t need it” or “I feel fine,” I stopped trying to convince him I was right. Instead, I got curious. “What’s making this too hard right now?” became my silent wondering. Was it the words I was using, the expectations surrounding it, my energy, the time of day, the sensory elements, the feeling of pressure, the other demands of the day?
But there was always a reason.
That’s why I created the Low Demand Medications course.
You’ll learn how to:
• Reduce conversations to what’s necessary
• Hold compassionate nuance around consent
• Stay curious when your child pushes back
• Focus on trusting relationship and build slowly
Because so often, the medication isn’t the problem. It’s the talking about it that gets us stuck.
Explore the new Low Demand Medications course by commenting “medication” and then check your DMs.
