Perfectly Made Early Childhood Intervention

10/03/2026

Autistic.
Autism Spectrum.

These days we are finding more and more people who are Autistic.

Why? Is it because there are more of us now? Possibly. There are a huge number of Autistic adults reproducing, after all.

Is it because we have gotten better at recognising Autistic people of all presentations? Likely. Before, diagnosing professionals were only ever looking for one very particular presentation of Autism. If you didn’t fit that presentation then you didn’t get diagnosed.

These days we know more. We know that Autistic people can present in so many different ways. You aren’t going to find two Autistic people who are exactly the same- just as you aren’t going to find ANY two people in the world who are exactly the same ANYWHERE.

I don’t think that’s difficult to grasp, and I’m tired of people demanding sameness from us.

More and more adults are recognising that they are autistic later in life. They often come to this realisation after struggling for a really long time. We struggle, we search, we reflect, we learn, and many of us find community. Many of us find acceptance, understanding, the vocab we need to explain our experiences. Many of us find validation, inclusion, authentic relationships, and pride- when all those things have been missing for a lifetime.

We don’t usually come out with funding. We don’t get additional supports. We don’t even get understanding or empathy a lot of the time.
We aren’t taking anything from anyone. We are only finding ourselves.
I don’t think that’s problematic.

And to those who might say that the autism spectrum is now too wide to be clinically useful, I say this:

We aren’t clinical products.
We aren’t case studies.
We aren’t hypotheses.
We aren’t data.

We are human.
We are living this life.

And for many of us, finally recognising that we are Autistic was life-changing. It was the moment we stopped wondering why, stopped hating ourselves, and started healing.

If I don’t meet your expectations of what an autistic person looks like, I don’t really care. I might have before. But my community has helped me develop self-acceptance, self-worth, and strong Autistic pride.

If you have found acceptance here, I’m extremely glad.
I’m sorry if anyone has made you feel invalid or unwelcome.

Titanic reference-
There is plenty of room on the floating door.
None of us deserve to sink.

Em 🌈

09/03/2026

We're late!

I recently heard an interview with Ross Greene, who spoke about how our systems and policies are designed for us to be "late" when addressing concerning behaviors. Allow me to explain.

If a child gets put in timeout, or seclusion, we're late. We, the adults, are reacting to a behavior that already happened.

Sending a kid to the "calm down" corner? We're late. The dysregulation already happened.

Detentions, suspensions, expulsions? Late again.

"Consequences?" Late. Consequences are handed out after the fact, with the hope that we "teach them a lesson" through the punishment so they don't do it again. We know that's not working. Talk to any teacher and they'll tell you that the behaviors are worse than they've ever been.

Dr. Greene was right!

I had the opportunity recently to work in a classroom, with a paraprofessional, on being "early".

We saw a young student walking on their toes during a transition between activities. This child typically didn't do that. That extra proprioception he was seeking out was interpreted as a stress cue. He went to the rug to play and bumped into another child. Yep, he needed help. I positioned myself to support both students on the carpet playing with blocks.

What happened? Nothing. The kids played. I helped them delegate who gets what blocks. I "noticed" what each student was building and encouraged either imitation or collaboration from the other. I re-directed the one student to a different set of blocks to knock down when demolition was more appealing than construction, as he was certainly eyeing his friend's structure to knock down. They played for about 15 minutes and then moved to snack. No issues. No sadness. No fighting. I was early.

What would have happened, as has always happened in the past? The two kids go to the carpet and fight over blocks. An adult comes in and separates them (late). Then, the demolition-desiring student manages to sneak over and knock down his classmate's structure. He gets put in timeout and the victim is crying because his work was destroyed (late). A tough moment for everyone (including the teacher).

Just think about how many big behavioral events would be avoided if we were "early". But, as Dr. Greene expressed, as parents and teachers, we're usually late, albeit unintentionally. It's how our systems, and society in general, are set up.

How can we do better at being early? This is going to sound like a giant plug for occupational therapists, but on some level, I think we all can step back and 'notice' some stress cues. Noticing those stress cues can help us solve problem proactively, before big behaviors occur.

Parents can notice when their child had a tough day at school, or they're tired, or their sibling is driving them a little bit crazy. Those are opportunities to be early, to communicate to them that you 'notice' the difficulty, and set them up for success.

Teachers have to deal with classroom disruptions multiple times a day. We lose millions of classroom days every year because of disruptions in learning. If a teacher 'notices' the dysregulation, pauses teaching to address the dysregulation, and returns to teaching once they are regulated, many of those (late) 'behavior management' tools (clip charts, loss of recess) wouldn't be necessary.

In the example I gave, toe walking was a stress cue. The loss of body awareness was another. Leaving your desk to walk around the room, deeper breathing, a furrowed brow, intense fidgeting, all could be stress cues and an opportunity to be early, if we recognize them.

The other thing I noticed is that being early was much more regulating for ME than being late. When we (the adults) are late, we often come in hot 🔥. We're mad, or really frustrated. Kids feel that. WE feel that. When we're early, we are in helping mode, which feels so much better (and calmer).

I would love to hear your thoughts on this. As parents and teachers, we are late...a lot. 🙋‍♂️ I am certainly guilty of that. But, many of the big behaviors that occur are predictable and can be addressed proactively if we commit to it and have the right tools. I knew my proprioceptive-seeking, demolition-desiring friend wanted to knock down his classmate's tower. That's a huge dopamine sq**rt for him. He needed my help. He needed me to be early. When I was early, everything went smooth. When I'm not early, "stuff" happens. I can own that, and I can work to be early more often. The consequence isn't necessary, but being early so I can teach them strategies and skills to play reciprocally with their friends is really important.

This is a longer post that usual for me. If you're still reading, I hope you aren't 'late' to whatever you were planning to do next. 😉

I appreciate you being here! 🥰

07/03/2026

💯

05/03/2026

When a child is overwhelmed by emotion, the instinct of many adults is to focus on the behavior.

Stop the crying.
Correct the outburst.
Fix the problem.

But a child in that moment is not asking for instruction first.

They are asking a far more primitive question:
Am I safe right now?

And they search for the answer in the person they trust most.

Not in the words we carefully choose,
but in the signals our nervous system is sending.
The steadiness in our voice.
The softness or tension in our body.
The expression that crosses our face before we even speak.

These cues tell a child whether the world around them is still safe enough to settle.

When we meet their distress with alarm,
frustration, or urgency, their system escalates to match it.

But when we meet it with calm, something powerful happens…

Their nervous system begins to borrow ours.
And little by little, they learn how to find that same steadiness within themselves. ❤️

26/02/2026

So timely, worth a re-share (need to watch the whole thing). I was just thinking about this today. Know you’re not alone. And your child or your children are Perfectly Made. They are exactly who they were and are meant to be. The early years can be tough, especially when you feel the weight of the world upon you. Just know, all of the love and kindness you pour into your child or children now, flourishes later. The fruits of your labor will be seen. Hold on to hope. The best is yet to come. And when your child grows up filled with love and acceptance, you’re paving the way for them to grow into their incredible potential 💕♾️

21/02/2026

I love this explanation of walking. Sometimes children (and adults) need to be explicitly taught things as they don’t always learn by osmosis.

14/02/2026

There is so much learning happening in play 💕♾️💕🎉

Today we explored farm animal puzzles — following a strong interest and letting curiosity lead the way. What might look simple on the surface is actually rich with development:
🧩 Fine motor strength and control
🐄 Hand–eye coordination
🐑 Visual discrimination and problem solving
🐖 Spatial awareness
🌾 Planning and sequencing

I especially loved seeing the pieces carefully lined up — a beautiful example of pattern exploration, order, and focused attention. When we honour a child’s interests, we open the door to deeper engagement, confidence, and joyful learning.

Interest-based play isn’t “just play” — it’s meaningful, brain-building work.

Celebrating neurodivergent play and the incredible skills that shine when children are supported to learn in ways that feel good to them. 🌈✨♾️💕🎉

13/02/2026

My 2-year-old’s special interest at the moment is all things animals. We incorporate his interests into everything we do with him. When children learn through play, they learn new concepts and build capacity far quicker than other methods of teaching/learning.

There’s so many great things happening in this play here. This post could be super long going into all the details. One thing that stands out to me while playing with him are his fine motor skills that he’s developed over time from lining up his toys. He’s developed these skills through play. I’ve always celebrated his ability to line up toys. If we were trying to make him play like many of his peers (neurotypical child development), he would have missed all of these wonderful opportunities to develop his fine motor skills doing something that he loves and engages with for so long. And he would have learned that his play is inferior. That breaks my heart because that is exactly the approach I have seen used with some neurodivergent children.

Instead he has learned that his play is valued and appreciated. He has shown so much pride in his play, and he has also demonstrated so much knowledge, far more than he can communicate, having been mostly non-speaking so far. Play is so exciting!!!

I absolutely love when he invites me in to his world of play. I love the exceptional knowledge he has about animals. And his echolalia for animal noises is incredible.

Every child is unique and every child is perfectly made. I celebrate my children and their incredible neurodivergent brains.

12/02/2026

12/02/2026

Research in child psychology shows that a full school day places far heavier demands on the nervous system than most adults realize. Noise, transitions, rules, social dynamics, and constant stimulation push a child’s brain into hours of self-regulation without rest. By pickup time, the emotional tank is empty.

This is why many children arrive home withdrawn, tearful, irritable, or overstimulated. Their behavior is not disrespect—it is recovery. Neuroscientists call this decompression. The brain needs two to three hours to downshift from high alert into a calmer state where connection becomes possible again. Homeschoolers rarely show this crash because their learning environments have fewer stress spikes and more flexible rhythms.

During after-school hours, the nervous system prioritizes survival over conversation. Snacking, quiet play, screens, or alone time are not signs of laziness—they’re attempts to regulate. Once the brain settles, emotional warmth returns naturally.

Understanding this changes everything. Parents can shift from “Why are you acting like this?” to “Your brain is tired from working so hard today.” A little softness, slower routines, and space to breathe make afternoons smoother for everyone. Sometimes the best parenting strategy is giving the nervous system time to come home too.