01/08/2024
Are you ready to be a mother?
The word “motherhood” comes with a gender-based role. We, the women are selected by nature to be mothers. This is an amazing experience that comes with lots of challenges and duties. Nobody can teach you how to be a mother. Not even your own mother can teach you the techniques to be a good mom! Every child is different and the duties that come with it are unique. Some women are born “mothers”- their maternal instincts are either used on their dolls or on their siblings, cousins or friends. Take Monica of “Friends” for example; she was the mother hen of that group. She was an example of how a woman is born with maternal instincts. She wanted to be a mother always. She even selected the names of her future babies when she was may be ten or eleven! On the other hand, her best friend Rachel was a slacker in every duty she was given. She only discovered her motherly nature when she herself wanted to keep her baby and take the duty that comes with it. Reading books about maternity and asking her mom to stay with her during her maternity leave as she doesn’t even know how many times one needs to change diapers! This might be a situational comedy but was every bit real for a lot of women out there back then or even now.
In this era, women are equally responsible for their study and economical independence just as their male counterparts. Most of the women can’t even find the time to think of starting a family. Once the ex-CEO of Pepsi India Indra Nooyi told in her interview that “the biological clock and the career clock are in total conflict with each other.” When the career needs you the most, you also have to be a mother and nurture the baby at the same time. How working mothers are managing it today still amazes me. We South-east Asian women should be awarded as super-women, as we have to face so many obstacles each day, the rest of the world can’t imagine. Even if you don’t have a salary account, staying at home is not easy for a daughter-in-law. Waking up early and doing all the house hold chores, taking care of kids, taking care of in laws and involving into dramatic cold wars with mother-in-law without the praise and support of husband is not easy. When you are the working daughter-in-law, the chaos is even worse. Ofcourse, there is always an exception. Some mother in laws have proved better than your own mother and make your life easy. Therefore, at this day and age, thought of becoming a mother is not as easy as it sounds. Yet time will never give you an option to hold the matter for later.
When you are thirty, you are technically a high-risk maternity subject. Diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity etc will be an issue for a majority of women. Some cases where PCOS, PCOD patients have trouble getting pregnant. Nevertheless, take it as a challenge. Giving birth to a life was never easy for anyone in any era. When you want to start a family, please take some basic steps. First of all , visit a gynecologist. She will give you some basic guidelines to prepare for motherhood. Check and balance your weight, diabetes, blood pressure, menstruation cycle etc. And please follow your doctor’s instructions carefully. Stop having alcohol or ci******es if you indulge in them. A lot of us don’t know that eating papaya and pineapple in the early trimester has proven deadly for a miscarriage. Follow the diet chart for pregnancy. Read maternity books or download an app helps you to calculate your menstruation cycle or your ovulation timing. Chat with your close ones who have been mothers recently. Decide who will take care of your kid when you’re at work.
How to monitor your kid, how to feed or change the diapers when you are not there. The office gives you maternity leave for highest six months (depends on the office rule). Some daycares provide services for working mothers. Of course, one should properly investigate if those daycares are up to the standard or not. Some offices have daycare services for their employees as well. Some women can trust their own mothers to be replacements when they are at work. Always remember, pregnancy and post-natal period is not the same. One has to deal with “baby blues” & take care of the kid. Taking mental health courses during pregnancy might sound advanced in our country but the city women should take it as a pre-natal to-do list. Some women are too occupied with career that having a child might seem like a dead end to their career. They can visit a gynecologist & freeze their eggs, if possible, for future. The technique is expensive and tiresome. The bio clock waits for none. Finally, whenever you decide to be a mother just sit back and relax. You are going to embark into a journey no one can explain. Don’t feel pressured, just feel it. Motherhood is an instinct, a heavenly thought, not everyone is blessed with. Ask yourself, are you ready for it?
